(The first part of this chapter is from Caramel Snail's perspective, temporarily switching to first person.)
I was always thinking.
When I was very young, before I had earned the name "Jiao Ziniu," I kept thinking about one thing.
Why was so much expected of me when I could accomplish nothing? My elders always boasted about me, praised me, and believed I was a genius. They prayed to gods and Buddhas, begging nonexistent deities to bless me. They hoped I would study hard, change my social class, and fulfill their dreams.
For that purpose, they would give everything they had, offering me all their love and all their nourishment.
Sometimes it was a box of almond milk, sometimes a fountain pen, sometimes a set of One Hundred Thousand Whys. I had even received a game console and a tablet.
Back then, I did not know that this treatment, like a privilege, was called "hope."
I had once thought that this privilege, like that of a crown prince, would continue forever.
But when I merely attended an ordinary school and became an ordinary person, I no longer enjoyed that privilege.
There was no other reason. I had extinguished their expectations. The candy and delicious nourishment bestowed upon me in childhood had ultimately gone down the drain along with their failed investment.
Perhaps from that moment on, I became afraid to answer anyone's fervent expectations. I hid my personality, deliberately avoided others' gazes, stopped interacting with people, and immersed myself in my own world.
Exercise was a good way to relieve stress. I chose armored combat from traditional martial arts. Only amid the clash of blades and armor, when adrenaline surged, sweat and shouts flooded my senses, and something like scorching lava poured into my veins and raced through every limb and