Brawl

It took Aburame Tetsumaru a full three days to finish his seclusion.

Once he regained mobility, the first thing he did was borrow several scrolls recording the Kikaichū Secret Technique from the clan. After obtaining Kikaichū, his privileges had clearly increased, allowing him to borrow plenty of materials and bring them home for study.

Another ten days passed, and all the Kikaichū in the Insect Hive had matured. They could no longer receive imprints.

This round of Kikaichū inheritance in the Aburame Family had ended. Twelve out of seventeen boys had succeeded, an unusually good result.

The boys who failed would have another chance next year. After that, they could only change their surnames and seek an opportunity to become ninja at the Ninja Academy. After all, not every child of the Aburame Family could become a ninja.

Aburame Tetsumaru read a great deal of material on Kikaichū, including organized traditional teachings and research notes left behind by clan elders. Combining the clan records with his own ten days of observation, he reached a conclusion: Kikaichū nest-building was harmful.

It was obvious when he thought about it. Building a nest meant creating a vast wound inside the body and carving out space, then destroying the body's original balance to establish a new one capable of housing Kikaichū. No matter what, it could not compare to the natural coordination of a body born whole.

The harm caused by Kikaichū nest-building had two aspects. First came the loss of potential: weaker constitution, slower Chakra growth, and impaired physical development.

Then there was an additional weakness: the inner walls of the Insect Hive were less resistant to poisonous gas, bacteria, and viruses than skin.

Of course, the clan's secret technique inheritance had measures to address both issues. From the moment one mastered Kikaichū, one would complete one stage of nest-building every two years, for a total of six stages, avoiding serious effects on development.

Every Aburame ninja was required to cultivate specialized Kikaichū subspecies capable of resisting and disinfecting known toxins and bacteria. After completing the cultivation of twenty-nine basic Kikaichū branches, Aburame ninja would actually become more resistant to toxins and disease, laying the foundation for the Insect Users' greater adaptability.

However, cultivation required money. A lot of money. His family absolutely could not afford to strengthen every project at once.

Aburame Tetsumaru sighed. For now, he should focus on the ants. He was counting on them to make money.

A few days later, construction began on the Sandaime's face on Hokage Rock, signifying that he had finally taken full control and had the freedom to create a spectacle of his own.

Aburame Tetsumaru's mind was full of holy crap. So that was why there had only ever been two heads. The Sandaime, who had climbed to the top twice and ruled for over forty years, had started out in such a difficult position.

No wonder. If the main problem when the Yondaime took office was that Konoha F4 were all alive and well, suppressing him so thoroughly that he could barely breathe—

Then when the Sandaime took office, Konoha had a whole pack of old fossils still alive, all veteran killers who had fought through the Warring States Period.

These ninja who had personally witnessed the Founding Konoha had all seen monsters like the First and Madara, men who could redraw maps with a casual gesture. Other than those two, they respected no one.

In their eyes, even the Second Hokage was barely acceptable. A Hokage ought to be capable of suppressing an entire ninja village alone and sweeping aside thousands of ninja troops.

"Senju Tobirama? Not good enough."

"Sarutobi Hiruzen? A Monkey with a combat power of only five."

"He has to turn his face red like a monkey's ass just to unleash a big move, and even then he can't flatten a hill. Too weak, way too weak. He's barely any stronger than me."

Those had been Elder Shihui's drunken ramblings.

Aburame Tetsumaru had listened with shining eyes at the time. There was nothing wrong with that, Elder. You really were just like the Sandaime. Neither of you could knock down a mountain.

Unfortunately, there had been no recording device on hand. The next day, the elder refused to admit he had ever said any of it.

Over the past few years, the Sandaime Sarutobi Hiruzen's situation had been very much like the Yondaime Namikaze Minato's. He had merely been a figurehead puppet.

The process of power struggles among the upper ranks would not reach the lower levels, but there would always be symbolic markers. In Konoha, the Hokage faces were such a marker.

The Hokage's victory meant that Konoha's tendency toward division had been halted and its cohesion had grown stronger.

Power struggles never stopped when they had enough. The Hokage would not settle for the authority he was supposed to have. He would inevitably further encroach upon the interests of the ninja clans and suppress them.

That was the inertia of fighting for power and profit, and the nature of politics. It was not something Sarutobi Hiruzen could stop. Even if he did not want to, Danzo would still push it forward enthusiastically.

Konoha would continue through round after round of power struggles. The ninja clans would keep declining until it reached its peak in the Uchiha Clan Massacre.

Tetsumaru was very glad that the Aburame Clan was firmly on the Hokage's side. Whoever became Hokage, they supported him. They always stood with the victors, never entered the core circle, and remained very stable.

After the Hokage joined forces with civilian ninja, their advantages had become unstoppable. The disadvantaged ninja clans should have bowed their heads, tucked in their claws, and cut their losses in time.

But not every ninja clan was so self-aware. The most flamboyant and least self-aware of them all was the Uchiha Clan. Every one of those oddballs was clever on their own, but together they became complete idiots.

Every Uchiha ninja had negative political intelligence. The higher their eye level, the more outrageous the deficit. Especially those with Mangekyō Sharingan. The most absurd was Uchiha Itachi, who decided that the clan threatened Konoha and slaughtered them all.

Good heavens. Forget ninja with signs of rebellion—were ordinary civilians who did not even become ninja a threat? Were newborn children guilty too?

Still, half of that sin had to be pinned on Uchiha Fugaku. His son had already been precocious, yet he took him to witness war at four years old and thoroughly taught him wrong.

The Uchiha Clan was like a bunch of bratty children. They did not actually have bad intentions; they simply did not know the severity of things and kept doing stupid acts that caused little direct harm but terrible consequences.

Looking at the seven Uchiha blocking the road, Aburame Tetsumaru could not help letting his thoughts wander. After all, that Red Eye clan had far too much screen time, practically stealing the protagonist's role and becoming the landing point for countless transmigrators.

The Uchiha Clan had caused F4 plenty of trouble over the years. The Hokage faction's steadfast hostility toward the Uchiha, and even the clan's destruction twenty-six years later, were probably disasters seeded right now.

The cause was very simple. Big brother Aburame Shikuro had beaten his classmate Uchiha Tiger at school, an Uchiha who had not awakened his eyes.

So another Uchiha, Uchiha Shangyu, who had awakened his eyes, brought several younger brothers to block Shikuro's path, trapping a group of Aburame children.

Holding a bag of flour, Aburame Tetsumaru listened to big brother Shikuro negotiate with Uchiha Shangyu. From the first words, it was all Uchiha glory and Uchiha pride. What else was there to say? Time to fight.

Aburame Tetsumaru looked around. The oldest Uchiha present was ten-year-old Uchiha Shangyu. Uchiha Tiger and Aburame Shikuro were classmates, both nine. The rest were little sprouts who had not even enrolled in school.

Excluding the three Ninja Academy students, the other children could only rely on physical fitness in a fight. The problem was that there were more Uchiha present, and their extra fighter was nine-year-old Uchiha Tiger. His side would be at a disadvantage.

Aburame Tetsumaru was not stupid. When two families fought, they naturally had to fight hard. He could not let down his title of Child King. It had already become his protective coloring.

Children could not use Kikaichū or Chakra in a fight. Recalling fighting techniques from his previous life, Aburame Tetsumaru put down the flour bag and rummaged through the seasonings in his backpack until he found a bag of salt. He opened it and checked. Fine salt crystals. Usable.

In that short time, Uchiha Shangyu had made his position clear, and the two older boys started fighting.

Fighting in the street was terribly improper. Even if his side had been forced into it, they would inevitably be punished afterward. But big brother Shikuro took good care of him, so naturally he had to fight alongside his brother, then get punished together.

He tucked the salt bag into his pocket, adjusted the opening, grabbed a handful of fine salt, and got ready.

The two older boys were evenly matched for the moment. Uchiha Tiger was too embarrassed to gang up on them, so he started trash-talking the younger Aburame children.

The Aburame Clan usually seemed quiet, but they actually had plenty of chatterboxes. The argument stirred up the sunglasses kids' talkative nature, their tongues flying as they sprayed the Uchiha until their faces turned red.

After barely returning a few fragrant greetings, the Uchiha received ten times the response. The humiliated Uchiha little sprouts angrily swung their claws and started fighting.

Everyone present was at least four years old, children of ninja clans who had begun receiving ninja education. But when children of equal strength fought, they forgot all their training and fell back on shoving, scratching, and wild flailing.

Only Uchiha Tiger was an overpowered presence. Once he swallowed his pride and joined the fight, the Uchiha gained a huge advantage, and the Aburame side was in trouble.

Fortunately, the Aburame Clan was very united. The sunglasses kids desperately held on, believing that their "Child King," Aburame Tetsumaru, would not let the Uchiha Clan off easy.

Tetsumaru picked out an Uchiha, grabbed the boy's right hand with his left, and yanked it aside to create an opening. Then he flicked his right hand and threw a faceful of fine salt at the Uchiha boy.

Σ( x △ x|||)

The boy's eyes were suddenly blinded. In his panic, he opened his mouth and screamed. Before shouting, people instinctively opened their mouths to inhale first. Tetsumaru had extensive experience with this situation, so he shoved the remaining half of the salt in his palm forward, filling the Uchiha's mouth with salt.

The Uchiha choked on the salt and tried to cough. Before the cough could come out, the fine salt had already absorbed the moisture in his eyes, nose, mouth, and throat, causing intense dryness and burning.

The burning sensation created the illusion of being scorched by fire. The body's natural emergency response forcibly stopped the cough. The breath-holding reaction was too fast; the intercostal muscles and diaphragm instantly stiffened, triggering sharp pain.

In plain language: he got the wind knocked out of him.

The poor boy could not see or breathe. His eyes, mouth, throat, and chest all hurt, and he felt like he was dying.

Aburame Tetsumaru followed up with a punch, knocking him down, then went looking for the next victim.

One after another, even nine-year-old Uchiha Tiger failed to escape a faceful of white salt and was knocked to the ground.

The Aburame side: (⊙.⊙)⊙.⊙)⊙.⊙)

The Uchiha side: (:з"∠)(:qゝ∠)(:з"∠)

In less than thirty seconds, six Uchiha were on the ground, rolling and struggling silently, their entire bodies covered in dust.

At the same time, snot, tears, and spit flowed everywhere, carving wet streaks through their dust-covered faces before gathering even more dust. It looked miserable.

By this point, even Aburame Shikuro and Uchiha Shangyu were dumbfounded. The two stood frozen in their fighting stances, staring blankly.

Everyone still standing watched Aburame Tetsumaru brush the salt from his hands, take out the salt bag in his pocket, seal it, put it back into his backpack, and then stand quietly as though he were still that quiet, well-behaved child.

Uchiha Shangyu turned to look at Aburame Shikuro.

Shangyu: What the hell was that?

Shikuro: I have no idea.

After a while, as tears, snot, and spit diluted the salt, the burning sensation faded.

All the Uchiha climbed back up, but each of them looked like a frightened quail, trembling as they crowded together behind Uchiha Shangyu. They did not even dare look at that quiet boy.

Soon afterward, a squad from the Konoha Military Police Force arrived—or rather, revealed themselves. Four adult Uchiha with red-rimmed eyes separated the children of the two ninja clans and gave their own children a furious scolding.

The brawl ended there. The older Uchiha angrily led the younger Uchiha away, not even in the mood to leave threats behind. Aburame Shikuro also led his younger brothers home.

Naturally, the aftermath of a group brawl was punishment. Aburame Tetsumaru did not know what the Uchiha Clan did, but Aburame Shikuro, who had led the incident, was confined. The other children were either scolded or punished with copying assignments.

Of course, none of them could avoid a bamboo-strip beating from their father or mother.

Aburame Tetsumaru got one too, and he was unconvinced.

"Oh? You're unconvinced?" Aburame Kazekazu waved a bamboo strip threateningly. "How many times have I told you? We're companions from the same village. You used such harsh methods in a fight. Wasn't that too vicious? That was unacceptable!"

"I already held back." The burning pain in his butt destroyed the transmigrator's self-control. "Otherwise..."

"Oh my, it seems our little Tetsumaru still had plenty of methods he didn't use?"

His mother, Aburame Aiko, asked in the gentlest voice. Tetsumaru, blinded by anger, failed to summon the caution he should have had. Enraged by the pain in his backside, he immediately spilled everything.

"If they weren't companions from the same village, why would I have used salt? It's so expensive."

"My, my, little Tetsumaru is so impressive. What weapons do you have?"

"Hmph, I always carry... Dad, what are you doing?"

Aburame Kazekazu grabbed Aburame Tetsumaru by both ankles and shook him. Sure enough, a huge pile of things clattered down.

He was screwed.

Smack smack smack smack smack smack smack

"What is this?" Aburame Kazekazu untied a triangular paper packet, revealing white powder inside.

Aburame Tetsumaru covered his thoroughly swollen butt with both hands and answered honestly, "Q-quicklime powder."

"!!"

"It can blind people's eyes, and it can burn blisters in their mouths."

"..."

"What about this?"

"An itching powder ground from Red-Haired Insect spines. It makes your skin itch for days if it touches you."

"What about this?"

"Spiky Powder."

"What about this?"

"Don't touch that, Dad!"

Pop.

Bleurgh~~~ x3

The battlefield moved to the courtyard, where a mixed-gender double beating began.

"What exactly is this?" The furious young parents pinched their noses shut and asked in muffled voices.

"Stinky Water," he answered weakly.

"Where did you get it?"

"It's the filtered residue left after fermenting red sea bream intestines."

!!!???

Smack smack smack smack smack smack

"Stop hitting me, stop hitting me! Vinegar can wash it off! I've tried it!"

"Go wash it off right now!" x2

That night, cries and wails rose from many homes in both the Aburame Clan and the Uchiha Clan.