World's Biggest Idiot

"Ding! Host Lu Fan has been deceived ten thousand times, successfully activating the Never Be Deceived System and obtaining the title Number One Fool in the Earth Realm!"

"From now on, any words spoken to deceive the host will come true under the system's BUG enhancement."

"From now on, each time the host is deceived, one point will be added. Once points reach ten, one random draw can be activated."

"System activation gift pack opened. Congratulations, host, on obtaining an Intelligence-Opening Pill. (Intelligence-Opening Pill: Taking it clears the mind, calms the spirit, and raises intelligence. It is especially effective on fools with slow brains.)"

"Given that the host is already stupid beyond saving, the system has proactively administered the Intelligence-Opening Pill."

The mechanical voice in his mind left Lu Fan completely dumbfounded. Then a cool sensation rushed straight into his head. His muddled mind instantly cleared, and the haze in his eyes gave way to life.

The old Lu Fan had never been very bright. As a result, his enormous inheritance had all been swindled away by his uncles, cousins, and siblings. Even his classmates had formed groups to scam money from him. At least sixty percent of the students at Dragon University had borrowed money from him.

It could be said that Lu Fan was Dragon University's public ATM, walking currency. Those utterly conscience-less classmates came to sponge off him every so often.

That was exactly what was happening now. A male classmate ran up to Lu Fan, bawling his eyes out as he claimed that his father, who had painstakingly raised him, had broken his back while working and urgently needed money to save his life.

So Lu Fan, who had always been a few screws short, transferred all 2,132 yuan in his WeChat account to him.

Lu Fan held his phone blankly and stared at the classmate, whose face changed instantly the moment he got the money. Now that Lu Fan's mind was clearer than ever, he recalled all the idiotic things he had done before. His expression was as colorful as a bikini store display.

"Lu Fan, my dad urgently needs this money to save his life, so I'll be going now. I'll pay you back someday. Bye!"

The classmate who had borrowed the money smugly raised his phone and showed it off to the surrounding students. See? That was how fast he made money. He would not need to ask his family for a single cent this month—there would naturally be idiots funding him.

"Damn it, Qin Shousheng beat me to it."

"Exactly. If I'd known that idiot Lu Fan got his living expenses today, I would've rushed over first no matter what."

"Ah! I missed out on 2,132 yuan!"

"I'd already made up my story, but I came too late!"

The surrounding onlookers were full of regret and disappointment. Not a single one sympathized with Lu Fan for being scammed.

Just as the male student who had gotten the money was about to leave, Lu Fan actually called out to him.

"Wait!"

"What? Is there something else?"

Qin Shousheng looked at him mockingly, without the slightest hint of gratitude one should have after borrowing money.

"You said your dad broke his back while working?"

Lu Fan's gaze was strange as he continued recalling the notification he had heard earlier.

"Yes, Lu Fan. My dad is waiting for this money to save his life. Bye!"

"Wait, you'll pay back the money you borrowed from me, right?"

Lu Fan shouted once more at Qin Shousheng's retreating back.

"Of course. I'll pay you back within a week."

Qin Shousheng's disdainful, perfunctory voice drifted over from afar. Once he turned the corner, he sneered. Pay him back? Who in all of Dragon University had ever paid this idiot back? Did Lu Fan think he was as stupid as him?

With the show over, the surrounding students all dispersed. Lu Fan sat alone on a bench by the roadside, staring into space.

The passing students were long used to his bizarre, moronic behavior. This guy could sit by the roadside and zone out for two hours straight. Unless he was thirsty, hungry, or desperate to use the bathroom, he would never get up.

The scene shifted. After receiving Lu Fan's transfer of over two thousand yuan, Qin Shousheng took his three roommates to a food stall outside the school gates.

He had picked up over two thousand yuan for free, so naturally they had to celebrate.

Just as the four arrived at the food stall and loudly discussed and mocked that idiot, Qin Shousheng's phone suddenly rang.

Seeing that it was his mother calling, Qin Shousheng did not think much of it and casually answered.

"What is it, Mom? What? Dad broke his back while working? The medical bills are eighty thousand? I..."

Qin Shousheng's expression changed drastically. He shot to his feet, while his other three classmates froze before exchanging strange looks.

Wasn't that the exact excuse Old Qin had just used to scam that idiot...

Lu Fan sat by the roadside for over half an hour before finally figuring out what the system he had awakened was for.

"Damn it, was I really that stupid before? Being scammed ten thousand times must've broken some kind of world record, right?"

"And this title, World's Biggest Idiot. System, are you sure you're not here just to humiliate me?"

His stomach let out a rumble, and only then did Lu Fan remember that he had not eaten anything all morning. It was already noon. His former self had actually been stupid enough to forget to eat.

After recalling the direction of the cafeteria, Lu Fan raised his foot and prepared to get something to eat. Then the roar of a supercar reached him, followed by a sharp brake behind him. Startled, Lu Fan twisted aside and hurriedly dodged out of the way.

When he turned around, he saw a bright red Ferrari supercar stopped behind him. A pretty, charming little head poked out from the driver's seat—it was Dragon University's campus belle, Liu Ruyan.

"Get lost, idiot. If I run you over, I won't have any money to compensate you."

Lu Fan instinctively stepped back. Liu Ruyan floored the Ferrari and shot past him. Lu Fan caught sight of another pretty girl sitting in the passenger seat.

It was not until the Ferrari had sped far away that Lu Fan came back to his senses. He glared resentfully at its receding taillights, because he had lost that supercar to Liu Ruyan in a bet.

"Let me think, what did I lose that Ferrari over? Right... Liu Ruyan pulled me into a contest to see whose boobs were bigger. Damn you, Liu Ruyan. Just you wait."

Recalling the bet with Liu Ruyan, Lu Fan felt as if ten thousand crows had flown over his head. He could not help but slap himself twice.

"Oh my god! That idiot isn't just stupid, he's crazy now! He's started hurting himself!"

"Everyone, stay away from him. If he can hurt himself, he might hurt others too. He's an idiot—he probably won't even be punished for hitting people."

The cries from the nearby students made Lu Fan's face darken. He lowered his head and ran toward the cafeteria.

"Even though I lost a Ferrari to Liu Ruyan in that bet, Top Campus Belle Liu's headlights... were really huge and really white!"

By the time he reached the cafeteria, many students were already lining up to get food.

Ignoring the strange looks around him, Lu Fan cut straight to the front of the line at the serving window.

"I'm hungry. Food!"

The four idiotic words slipped out of his mouth automatically, and only then did Lu Fan realize that what he had just done really was stupid as hell.

Not one of the students behind him objected to his cutting in line. They looked completely used to it. Who would bother arguing with an idiot?

The lunch lady had a fierce, fleshy face. When she saw Lu Fan, her expression was full of disgust. She casually took out a tray, scooped up a ladleful of cabbage and rice, and handed it to him.