Never Disappointing in Disappointing Ways

"Hey, Kiana, think of something!" Yu Luo yelled, being dragged by Kiana along Sakura Avenue. A horde of Zombie Girls was chasing him, their cries echoing as they rushed towards them. Yu Luo flinched, narrowly dodging the bamboo sword in Kendo Girl's hand, and shouted in exasperation.

"Don't bother me, I can't concentrate like this!" Kiana raised her other hand, firing two shots from her USP to take down a Zombie Girl in a cheerleader outfit, then kicked her away before continuing her desperate escape.

"You're the white-haired idiot, you always have a plan!" Yu Luo's face turned green as he looked at the zombie army behind him and started yelling incoherently.

"Even if you say that, I'm just an ordinary high school girl, what can I do!" Kiana dodged another Zombie Girl who was speeding towards them on a motorcycle, responding as she did.

"An ordinary high school girl who carries twin pistols?!" Yu Luo's urge to retort compelled him to mock her, even in this dangerous moment: "By the way, where did you get the bullets for your guns, are they infinite?!"

"How could they be, you idiot teacher!" Kiana threw Yu Luo into the air, then nimbly leaped to dodge a rocket fired from behind. Using the explosion's airflow, she ran a bit further, grabbed Yu Luo's collar as he fell, and continued running, still responding to his quips:

"I took them from these people!"

"What kind of weird girls' high school is this! The arrows they shoot explode, the bamboo swords can kill, they have riot shields, even biker gangs, and they have bullets on them. This is some kind of interdimensional talent training center, isn't it!"

"Crap, we're out of road!" Kiana stopped abruptly, and Yu Luo crashed into her back, his nose stinging. Hearing Kiana, Yu Luo looked up and saw the road ahead completely blocked by collapsed buildings.

"What do we do then?!" Yu Luo asked Kiana for her opinion, feeling lost. He was unfamiliar with the place and didn't even know the internal layout of this academy, so he could only rely on this white-haired idiot in front of him.

"We'll have to go through the mountain behind the school." Kiana faced the charging zombie horde with her twin pistols, ready for battle: "Teacher Yu Luo, charge with me, don't die!"

"Wait, give me something to defend myself with first!" Yu Luo shouted. Kiana replied impatiently, "Find it yourself, I only have these two guns!"

Yu Luo had no choice but to scan his surroundings for anything he could use as a weapon. Finally, he felt something on the ground and sighed, "There's no other way, I'll have to use one of the legendary Ten Great Divine Artifacts."

Hearing Yu Luo, Kiana turned her head curiously, wanting to see where this artifact came from in such a desolate place. However, when she saw what Yu Luo called an artifact, she almost choked with anger: "What kind of divine artifact is that, it's just a brick!"

"Don't underestimate it," Yu Luo said seriously. "This thing is easy to find and carry, it deals double damage from the front, critical damage from the side, and fatal damage from the edges. It can also be used as a thrown weapon. How can you say it's not a divine artifact!"

"I see." The System in Yu Luo's mind seemed to have a sudden realization and then a prompt sounded in his mind: "Beep, Mission [Arm Yourself] completed. Reward: 1 Saint Quartz. 2000 Friendship Points."

Yu Luo curled his lips upwards, clearly satisfied with having tricked the System. At that moment, Kiana's voice sounded in his ear: "I'll count to three, and we charge together, don't fall behind!"

Yu Luo nodded, his playful smile disappearing as he seriously watched the approaching zombie horde.

"One!"

"Two!"

"Charge!"

Kiana leaped forward, charging directly into the zombie horde. Yu Luo almost threw out his back, shouting, "You said one, two, three, where's three?!"

However, to avoid slowing Kiana down, Yu Luo mustered all his strength and managed to keep up behind her. He swung the brick in his right hand, smashing it into the head of a cheerleader zombie. The two of them plunged into the zombie horde, fighting their way out.

"Teacher Yu Luo's stamina isn't great, but his skills are pretty good!" Kiana said, taking down a Penguin Girl blocking their path and praising him.

"Hoo... hoo... After all, I'm not an idiot, my stamina definitely can't compare to yours." Yu Luo panted, grabbing his brick and using its edge to open up a charging Kendo Girl. He didn't forget to tease Kiana: "Back in my day, I was the Double Flower Big Red Stick, carrying a brick, I smashed my way from Causeway Bay all the way to Tsim Sha Tsui. Even Chan Ho Nam had to bow down to me!"

"Who's Chan Ho Nam? I don't know him!"

With Yu Luo unleashing his full potential, the two of them miraculously fought their way to the outer edge of the zombie horde, with only a thin layer separating them from escape. Perhaps it was the proximity to freedom, but Yu Luo's mind began to relax. The physical fatigue surged through him, his legs weakened, and he tripped over something, losing his balance and falling towards the ground.

"Teacher Yu Luo!" Kiana had already charged ahead. Seeing Yu Luo suddenly fall, she immediately wanted to turn back into the zombie horde to save him. However, the surrounding zombies were closer to Yu Luo, and Kiana couldn't reach him in time.

"Hey, hey, isn't this the protagonist's script? Did I get the wrong script?" Even as the zombies were about to pounce on him, Yu Luo's first reaction was to mock the cliché scene where the female protagonist always falls at a critical moment. His second reaction was to consider using the System's gacha function.

Even though the light from a successful draw might attract a large number of zombies, possibly even a BOSS, which would make escaping more difficult, he decided to deal with that later. For now, he just wanted to save his own life.

"Stingy System, I want to draw." Yu Luo said calmly in his mind. The System, abandoning its previous attitude, became unprecedentedly enthusiastic, like a merchant trying to attract customers: "Of course, of course, I will provide the best service."

"Za Warudo!" As the System shouted a chuunibyou phrase in Yu Luo's mind, Yu Luo miraculously found that the zombies about to pounce on him had all frozen, as if time had stopped.

"So I'm a Stand User? Are you my Stand?" Yu Luo exclaimed as if he had discovered a new world. The System, with a tone like it was looking at an idiot, replied: "This is just enhancing your thoughts thousands of times, causing you to perceive external events thousands of times slower. Time hasn't actually stopped."

"Then why did you shout Za Warudo, are you chuunibyou?!" Yu Luo's dream shattered, and he immediately cursed angrily.

"What's wrong with being chuunibyou? People with chuunibyou can build harems, but you're a normal person and still single!" The System delivered a critical blow to Yu Luo's heart. Yu Luo could only angrily end the bickering with the System and said helplessly, "Enough nonsense, I want to draw!"

The System's demeanor immediately shifted back to its previous enthusiastic facade: "Your dearest System is at your service."

Yu Luo curled his lips: "How bright is the light from a four-star or five-star draw?"

"About half of Changkong City can see it."

"Why are you so good at screwing over the Host?!" Yu Luo complained again, then asked the core question: "What about the light from three-star and below?"

"It's within a radius of about a hundred meters." The System answered enthusiastically, being extremely considerate, but only when Yu Luo had a spending need.

"I still have one free Friendship Ten-Pull and 2000 Friendship Points. I'll use them all." Yu Luo said calmly. The friendship pool wouldn't have cards of three stars or higher. In the current situation, he only needed an ordinary Heroic Spirit to help him escape. Besides, star rating doesn't always represent strength.