Ritchie, You've Ruined My Reputation as an Educator

Snape raised his head, his expression unreadable. "Nicolas Flamel?"

He knows?

I knew Professor Snape was the best!

Eliana edged closer, eyes sparkling like a puppy that had caught the scent of a bone.

"I've looked through so many books, but I haven't found a thing."

She gripped the edge of Snape's desk with both hands, rested her chin on the backs of them, and spoke in a pitiful little voice.

Snape said nothing. He lifted the tip of his quill slightly and looked down at Eliana, crouched beside his desk.

The room abruptly fell quiet and tense. Eliana shifted uneasily, but quickly arranged her face into the wide-eyed, snaggletoothed look of a guileless little fool who couldn't read the room.

"Could Miss Richie tell me where you heard Nicolas Flamel's name if you know nothing about him? And what inspired such astonishing enthusiasm that you would look through... so many books?"

He mimicked Eliana's tone, the hint of a smile on his face.

Eliana froze.

"Ah... well... um..."

She faltered.

She couldn't mention sneaking out after curfew to duel Malfoy, or how he had stood her up and she had blundered into the forbidden area where the three-headed dog was kept. She couldn't mention setting Quirrell's robes on fire, and secretly coaxing information out of Hagrid seemed out of the question too.

She had a feeling she would be thrown out of Hogwarts before Quirrell if she told him all that.

...So what can I say?

Snape's gaze grew steadily more hostile.

"I don't think Quirrell's a good person!" she declared, promptly dumping the blame on Garlic Head. "I heard him muttering that name. I suspect he's plotting something, so I wanted to investigate."

Snape gave a cold laugh, rose without a word, and strode toward the huge cabinet that covered nearly an entire wall in the corner.

Eliana was baffled, but her feet carried her after him before she could think.

Snape spun around so sharply that his billowing cloak nearly struck her face. A tiny crystal vial was caught between his fingers.

"Do you know what this is?" he asked softly.

Eliana took the vial of clear liquid and said hesitantly, "It looks like water... the Draught of Living Death?"

She glanced at Snape's face and hurriedly changed her answer. "Uh, Soothing Potion?"

"It seems that, alongside the lies, Miss Richie's head has miraculously retained a little knowledge of Potions. I'm deeply honored," Snape said with a sneer, though his expression eased slightly. "Truth Serum."

He turned his back, his voice chillingly low. "Just three drops will make a person reveal their deepest secrets, even in front of everyone—Ritchie! What are you doing?"

He whipped around and caught Eliana in the act of sneaking the Truth Serum into her pocket.

His wand smacked the back of her hand. "Did you think I was giving you a present?"

Eliana yelped and snatched her hand back, though her gaze lingered longingly on the crystal vial.

"Now I know you weren't."

She muttered it under her breath.

Snape gave a cold laugh and said in a soft, sinister voice, "Unfortunately, it cannot be used on students."

Eliana straightened like a startled marmot.

Snape seemed pleased to have frightened the little brat speechless. Malicious delight glinted in his black eyes.

"You ought to be—" he hissed like a snake. Especially careful, or I might accidentally spill it into your mushroom soup. Then you wouldn't be able to lie for the rest of the week.

"I understand, Professor Snape!" Eliana cried excitedly. "Thank you for believing me!"

Snape: ???

For once, he looked bewildered. He tried to work out which word he had said, or what part of his tone, could possibly have conveyed any trust in Eliana.

Yet Eliana was visibly thrilled. Even her lips were trembling with heartfelt gratitude.

Snape began to wonder whether he was going senile and had forgotten what he had said.

He was, for once, reflecting on himself when Eliana announced with renewed determination:

"I'll find a chance to slip it into Professor Quirrell's Pumpkin Juice!"

Snape: ??

So much for reflection.

He understood now. There was something wrong with Eliana's brain.

He turned toward his potion cabinet. If he remembered correctly, hellebore had a certain soothing effect on the brain.

Behind him, the little Mandrake with the faulty brain excitedly chattered away about her plan to drug someone. "The food in the dining hall appears directly in the cups, so it's hard to tamper with. Maybe I could smear the Truth Serum on the inside of Quirrell's cup beforehand. You said it only takes three drops—that wouldn't be noticeable at all."

"Or I could pretend I need to talk to you during a meal, put some Truth Serum on my fingernail, and flick it into his cup without anyone noticing!"

A vein throbbed in Snape's forehead.

He was not remotely surprised to discover that this gifted young witch was just as inventive when it came to mischief.

"Forgive me for interrupting, Miss Richie," he said with a smile that did not reach his eyes. "Are you discussing how to drug a professor's colleague in front of him? And attempting to drag that professor into it?"

Eliana looked at him with wide, dewy eyes. Her innocent expression gave no hint that she had just proposed something so thoroughly underhanded.

"Professor, don't you agree with me that Quirrell isn't a good person? Isn't that why you hinted I should investigate with Truth Serum? You said it couldn't be used on students—that means it can be used on professors, doesn't it?"

She scratched her head in confusion.

You know perfectly well who I was hinting should be given Truth Serum, don't you?

How can you be so sure of yourself?

"Shut up, Ritchie," Snape snapped, his patience exhausted. "You pose no threat to my standing in academia, but you could ruin my reputation as an educator and destroy me in a court of law."

"From now on, do not tell anyone I'm your professor. Your humble professor is terrified that teaching you will one day land him in Azkaban."

Eliana blinked. "Huh?"

Snape seized her by the back of her collar and marched toward the door.

"Listen to me, Ritchie. Quirrell, Nicolas Flamel, and whatever other little secrets you're investigating—none of it has anything to do with you! A little talent does not give you license to do as you please and meddle in everything!"

"If I learn you're secretly planning to get involved again, Ritchie, Gryffindor's empty hourglass will applaud you."

He tossed Eliana out of the dungeon like a piece of rubbish and slammed the door.

Eliana got to her feet, wincing as she rubbed her backside. She was about to slip away when the door flew open again.

"You really are impossible to guard against, Miss Richie." Grim-faced, Snape snatched back the Truth Serum she had managed to steal again. "Stealing a professor's dangerous potions. Five points from Gryffindor."

He slammed the door again with a bang.