Meteor and Wind Baboon Duet

On the outskirts of Soul Hunting Forest, the night was as thick as ink that refused to dissolve.

The stench of rotting withered branches and rotten leaves mingled with the droppings of unknown soul beasts in the distance, drilling straight into his nostrils. Tang San stumbled through the bushes, his once somewhat presentable shit-green team uniform long reduced to strips of cloth hanging from him, making him look like a beggar who had wandered for half a year.

"Cough, cough..."

Tang San clutched his chest and coughed violently twice, his palm covered in black blood threads.

Those were the lingering side effects of the King of Hell's Post Toxin. Even though he had suppressed it with the Mysterious Heaven Skill for three days, his meridians still hurt as though they had been scorched by fire. But he did not care. The pain in his body was not even one ten-thousandth of the humiliation in his heart.

"Qian Mo... Xiao Wu... Flender..."

He silently recited those names in his heart. Each time he did, the hostility in his eyes deepened.

For the past three days, he had been like a street rat. He had five hundred stolen Gold Soul Coins but did not dare enter the city to buy medicine, because Wanted Posters of him covered the city gates. He had already killed the artist who drew him with a pointed mouth and monkey cheeks ten thousand times in his mind.

"Heaven is about to place great responsibility upon this man."

Tang San bit into the dry, bitter tree root in his hand and forced it down. His gaze was sinister yet resolute. "This is only temporary. I am a disciple of the Tang Sect. I possess ultimate arts this world cannot comprehend. As long as I lie low in Soul Hunting Forest, kill soul beasts, absorb soul rings, and forge hidden weapons... one day, I will return to Suotuo City and turn every person who humiliated me into puppets on strings!"

Like every protagonist who had fallen to rock bottom, Tang San was carrying out the indispensable task of psyching himself up.

Just then, the grass ahead rustled.

Tang San's gaze sharpened, and his body instinctively tensed. His left hand quietly reached for the Twenty-Four Bridges Moonlight Night at his waist. Although the Godly Zhuge Crossbow had been destroyed, he still had several Bone Piercing Nails.

"Who is it?!" Tang San barked. Though his Purple Demon Eye was weak, it still glinted coldly in the darkness.

The grass parted.

A creature barely half a man's height leaped out. Its body was covered in messy gray fur, and it had a face like a thunder god's, red buttocks, and a mouthful of yellow teeth. It scratched at its ears and cheeks while letting out a string of mocking "chittering" cries at Tang San.

A Wind Baboon.

An exceedingly low-level soul beast with roughly ten-year cultivation. Its attacks were simple and cowardly: throwing rocks, spitting saliva, or scratching people with its not particularly sharp claws. In the Spirit Master World, it was trash that even a First-Level Soul Warrior could not be bothered to glance at.

Seeing that it was such a thing, Tang San's tense nerves relaxed, only to be replaced by a fury at being insulted.

"Even an animal like this dares mock me?"

Tang San smiled, the corner of his mouth splitting open to reveal a row of bloodstained teeth.

"Perfect. I need blood to commemorate my past. You may be trash, but tearing you into eight pieces should ease the hatred in my heart."

Tang San slowly raised his still-functional left arm and struck what he considered an exceptionally handsome opening stance. The Mysterious Jade Hand activated, and his palm instantly became as smooth and hard as jade.

"Controlling Crane Capturing Dragon!"

Tang San roared. Though his body staggered, at that moment, his bearing made it seem as though he faced not a monkey, but the Pope of Spirit Hall.

The Wind Baboon was startled by the sudden display of force. The rock it had just picked up slipped from its hand, and it turned to flee.

At the same time, thousands of miles away.

Spirit City, atop the highest terrace of Papal Palace.

The night breeze was slightly cool and carried a floral fragrance. Qian Mo lay on a cushioned lying chair while Zhu Zhuqing curled up lazily in his arms like a little cat. She peeled a crystal-clear lychee and brought it toward Qian Mo's mouth.

"Open up~" Zhu Zhuqing's voice was soft and sweet. Only in front of Qian Mo would she shed that icy disguise.

Qian Mo shamelessly enjoyed being fed, his gaze casually sweeping across the vast starry sky.

"The stars are so bright tonight." Zhu Zhuqing rested her head against Qian Mo's chest, listening to his powerful heartbeat sound and feeling incomparably secure.

"Yeah." Qian Mo chewed on the lychee, then suddenly pointed at a shooting star streaking across the horizon. "Look at that."

It was an unremarkable shooting star trailing a long tail of flame as it crossed the southwestern region of Douluo Continent.

"I heard wishes made upon shooting stars come true." Zhu Zhuqing blinked.

"A wish?" Qian Mo scoffed. The Auspicious Beast Skull between his brows warmed slightly as an invisible Law of Causality fluctuation instantly formed a connection with that shooting star. "I think that shooting star looks full of killing intent, like it's about to smash some unlucky bastard to death."

"Look at the direction it's heading. Doesn't it seem a little like Soul Hunting Forest?"

Qian Mo tossed out the remark casually.

[Peerless Auspiciousness System · Words Become Reality (Misfortune Version) activated.]

[Target locked: Child of Destiny (crippled), Tang San.]

[Law of Causality correction: meteor trajectory shifted by 3.14 degrees. Gravitational acceleration increased by 500%.]

At the horizon, the shooting star that should have burned up completely in the atmosphere suddenly seemed to hear some command. It shuddered violently, and a fist-sized High-Density Meteorite Fragment split from its core.

Rather than continuing its interstellar journey, the fragment plunged at a vertical angle that defied physical laws, carrying a piercing sonic boom as it shot straight toward a certain coordinate in Soul Hunting Forest.

Soul Hunting Forest.

Tang San's "capturing dragon" hand had just reached out, his fingertips only three inches from the back of the Wind Baboon's neck.

"Die! Ant!"

Cruel light flashed in Tang San's eyes. He had already decided that after catching the monkey, he would first crush its limbs, then skin it and make a cushion from its hide.

Suddenly.

A terrifying sense of dread that made his scalp prickle instantly enveloped his entire body. It was the instinctive terror living beings felt in the face of a natural disaster.

Tang San subconsciously looked up.

There was no time for him to think, not even time to shout "Wocao."

In his vision, a blazing mass of fire rapidly expanded, instantly filling his entire field of sight.

"BOOM—!!!"

An incomparably muffled loud noise exploded through the silent forest.

The fist-sized meteorite fragment, carrying the momentum of its descent from the heavens, struck Tang San's raised left shoulder with flawless precision, as if it had a Guidance System installed.

"Crack—splurt!"

The sound of shattering bones and spraying flesh rang out simultaneously.

Tang San did not even feel pain. The enormous shockwave instantly rattled his brain, making him like a nail struck by a great hammer as he was driven directly into the dirt.

A small pit two meters across appeared in the ground.

At the bottom of the pit, Tang San lay spread-eagled. His left shoulder had completely vanished, reduced to a puddle of mangled flesh. He was suffering from an extremely severe concussion, his eyes rolled white, foam spilling from his mouth, and his limbs twitching unconsciously.

If not for the Mysterious Heaven Skill protecting his body, that blow would have turned him into a meat patty.

But he did not die.

That was the resilience of a Child of Destiny. Even at low health, he always clung to one last breath.

However, sometimes living was worse than dying.

The Wind Baboon, which had originally been scared out of its wits, now clung tremblingly to a tree several meters away.

It poked out its head and carefully observed the pit.

That terrifying human... seemed to have stopped moving?

The Wind Baboon blinked its mung bean eyes and cautiously threw a rock.

"Smack." The rock struck Tang San on the forehead, raising a lump.

Tang San did not react. His body merely twitched.

The Wind Baboon was delighted.

The thrill of "counter-killing a strong person" erupted within the walnut-sized brain cavity of this low-level soul beast. It jumped down from the tree and cautiously approached the edge of the pit.

It smelled blood, its favorite scent.

"Squeak squeak!"

The Wind Baboon shrieked excitedly and jumped directly onto Tang San's chest. First, it viciously raked Tang San's already disfigured face several times with its claws, leaving bloody wounds deep enough to expose bone.

The severe pain restored a sliver of awareness to Tang San, who hovered on the edge of unconsciousness.

He struggled to open his eyes. His vision was blurry, and all he could see was a furry monster sitting atop him.

"Get... get off..."

Tang San wanted to raise his hand, only to discover that his left arm was gone. His right arm had already been crippled earlier, and the meteorite's shockwave had severed the meridians in both legs.

Right now, he was meat on a cutting board.

The Wind Baboon seemed to understand the human's weakness and became even more brazen. It turned around, presenting its back to Tang San's face.

At that instant, Tang San seemed to realize something. His pupils contracted violently, and unprecedented terror and despair filled his eyes.

"No... don't..."

The Wind Baboon ignored his begging for mercy. It stuck out its swollen, thick buttocks, which reeked of a powerful fetid smell from never being washed, aimed them at Tang San's mouth and nose, and sat down hard.

"Pffft."

The world went dark.

Tang San's mouth and nose were tightly blocked by that elastic, foul-smelling mass of flesh.

Oxygen deprivation hit instantly.

And along with it came biochemical poison gas potent enough to fumigate an elephant to death.

"Ugh... ughhhh!!!"

Tang San desperately shook his head, trying to fling the disgusting thing away. But to maintain its balance, the Wind Baboon planted its hind claws firmly on his shoulders, while its buttocks stuck tightly to him like a suction cup.

Oxygen deprivation.

Blood began rushing to his brain.

Tang San's lungs felt as though they were about to explode. Yet he could not draw in even a thread of air. All he could inhale was the nauseating baboon body odor.

What was this?

I'm a transmigrator! I'm a Tang Sect genius! I possess Twin Martial Souls!

I should die in a duel against a Titled Douluo. I should die beneath the lightning tribulation of becoming a god. Even dying at Qian Mo's hands would count as a dignified villain's death!

Why... why did it have to be the butt of a ten-year Wind Baboon?!

This way of dying is simply the greatest insult to the name "Tang San"!

Tang San's eyes bulged from congestion, and bloody tears burst from the corners of his eyes. In his heart, he let out one final, silent roar:

"Qian Mo!!! Was it you?! Even as a ghost, I won't let you go!!!"

Yet reality was cruel.

One minute later.

Tang San's struggles grew weaker and weaker.

Two minutes later.

His legs gave one final kick, then fell completely still.

The generation's "Pure and Chaste" Young Master Tang San, a future God King seedling, had been crippled by a meteorite falling from the sky in an unknown muddy pit, then suffocated to death after a ten-year Wind Baboon sat its butt on his face.

He was twelve years old.

Cause of death: terrible luck.

Feeling that the person beneath it had stopped moving, the Wind Baboon finally stood up in satisfaction. It urinated on the corpse, then picked up the bloodstained Twenty-Four Bridges Moonlight Night from Tang San's waist. It could not use it, but it liked shiny things.

It shrieked strangely as it darted into the forest, concealing both its achievements and fame.

[Ding!]

[Congratulations, host. You have successfully killed (indirectly caused the death of) Child of Destiny Tang San.]

[It has been detected that the deceased's resentment before death reached the heavens, and his method of death was highly creative. Judged as "Perfect Harvest."]

[Reward obtained: Qi Luck Plunder Completion (Tang San's remaining qi luck has been completely converted into Spirit Hall's qi luck).]

[Additional reward obtained: God-Tier Soul Bone · External Attachment · Eight Spider Lances (purified version, non-toxic, can evolve into a Twelve-Winged Angel Divine Gear Component).]

[Special achievement title obtained: [Friend of Baboons] (when equipped, all Primate Soul Beasts' favorability toward host +100).]

Spirit City, on the terrace.

The system notification exploded in Qian Mo's mind.

Qian Mo's hand paused as he peeled the lychee, and he nearly burst out laughing.

"He died?"

He had expected Tang San to be unlucky, but he had not expected it to be so... haphazard.

"Friend of Baboons... This system is also an expert at messing with people's heads." Qian Mo shook his head and casually closed the panel.

"What's wrong?" Zhu Zhuqing sensed the change in Qian Mo's mood and raised her head, a trace of confusion in her heterochromatic beautiful eyes.

"Nothing." Qian Mo fed the peeled lychee into her mouth, his fingertips gently brushing across her soft lips. "I just feel that the world suddenly became much quieter."

"That annoying insect will never appear again."

Though Zhu Zhuqing did not know what had happened, if Qian Mo said so, then it had to be true. She obediently nodded and did not ask further.

"So what do we do next?" she asked.

Qian Mo stood and stretched. His platinum robe fluttered loudly in the night wind. He gazed into the distance, his eyes seeming to pierce through mountains and rivers before settling in the direction of Heaven Dou City.

There, a female tyrannosaurus was nursing a broken heart.

There was also a useless Master searching for a new host.

"Since Shrek is gone, someone still has to carry on this show." A playful curve formed at Qian Mo's lips. "I heard there's a Blue Tyrant Academy in Heaven Dou City, and its dean is a stunning beauty with quite the fiery temper."

"And apparently, she has taken in a stray dog."

"Let's go, Zhuqing."

Qian Mo took Zhu Zhuqing's hand, their fingers interlocking.

"We're going to Heaven Dou City to claim our spoils. And while we're at it... we'll give that 'Master' a belated retirement gift."