There Was No Immortal Path I Wanted to Walk Without You

"I'm not going!"

The moment Xiao Mo said he wanted her to go cultivate at Tian Xuan Sect, Bai Ruxue sprang to her feet.

"Ruxue, you have a talent for cultivation. You shouldn't be confined to such a tiny place. There's a much wider world waiting for you."

"But I like it here!"

"Ruxue, listen to me."

"I won't listen, I won't listen! I'm not listening!"

The young woman covered her ears and shook her head over and over.

"Xiao Mo! You big stinker!"

Bai Ruxue ran out of the courtyard, wiping away her tears.

"Ruxue."

Xiao Mo called after her, but Bai Ruxue had already vanished into the dusk.

Seated on a stone bench, Xiao Mo looked at the chicken soup on the table and couldn't help sighing.

In Xiao Mo's eyes, there was no benefit to Ruxue staying by his side.

If she had a master to teach her, it would greatly benefit her cultivation.

Besides, when Ruxue underwent Dragon Transformation in the future, she would need to travel down rivers and into the sea.

She would need someone to protect her on that journey.

As one of the Ten Great Sects in the world, Tian Xuan Sect definitely had the ability to protect Ruxue.

"Was I the one who kept her tied down?"

Xiao Mo lowered his head and took the pendant from inside his collar.

Looking at the translucent, silvery-white snake scale around his neck, Xiao Mo couldn't help clenching it tight.

He rose to his feet and walked into Bai Ruxue's room.

There wasn't much decoration in Bai Ruxue's room—just a bed, a stool, and a dressing table.

Aunt Chen had given Ruxue the dressing table a year ago, after she no longer wanted it.

The room was simple, but spotlessly clean.

Walking over to the dressing table, Xiao Mo spotted a small stack of sheets of Xuan paper stitched together with thread.

He flipped them open. The pages were covered in neat, delicate handwriting.

[The first day of the fourth month.

Two jin of duck, seventy wen.

Three jin of pork, sixty wen.

Two jin of tofu, eight wen.

Chilies.

I spent two taels of silver on groceries today.

Hmph, I'm never going to the market in Huang Village again. Meat has been getting more and more expensive lately.

Tomorrow I'll go up the mountain and catch a pheasant for Xiao Mo to build up his strength. That'll save us some money, too.

But Xiao Mo's taking the Provincial Examination soon, so I should buy some more mutton for him. I heard eating mutton is even better for your health.]

[The second day of the fourth month.

I don't need to buy groceries today. The food in the cellar will keep for another two days.

I gathered some herbs in the mountains and caught two chickens. I'll sell one and stew the other for Xiao Mo. Hehe.

It's just that Aunt Huang from Huang Village kept trying to haggle with me. How annoying! I'm not selling them that cheap!]

[The third day of the fourth month.

Little silkworms, hurry up and spin your silk! Once you've spun it, I can weave cloth, and then I can sell it for money and make clothes for Xiao Mo.

Xiao Mo's leaving for the prefectural city at the end of the month. I have to make him a nice new green robe.

The other scholars have new clothes to wear, so my Xiao Mo should have some, too!]

[The fourth day of the fourth month.

One bunch of Chinese chives, one wen.

Rapeseed, two wen.

Eggplant.]

[The fifteenth day of the fourth month. I made Xiao Mo a new outfit. I'll give it to him to wear when he leaves. He'll definitely like it.]

[The twenty-fourth day of the fourth month.

Xiao Mo wore the clothes I made for him.

Mm, I really am a skilled seamstress. Xiao Mo looked so handsome in them.

But Xiao Mo said he didn't need clothes, and that instead of making him a green robe, I should make myself a skirt.

Honestly, I don't need new clothes. The hemp garment I'm wearing is good enough.]

[The first day of the fifth month. Xiao Mo and I arrived in the city. Is this the prefectural city of the human race? It's so lively! Xiao Mo took me shopping and bought me sugar-coated haws.

The sugar-coated haws were delicious.

Today, when Xiao Mo saw a bun stall, he said it reminded him of an old friend. Could that old friend have been a woman?

And that brothel—what does it mean to do what men and women do together? Xiao Mo wouldn't tell me.

But it's all right. One day, Xiao Mo and I can do what men and women do together.]

[The seventh day of the fifth month. Xiao Mo went into the examination hall. Without Xiao Mo, I'm so bored.]

[The eighth day of the fifth month. Without Xiao Mo, I'm so bored. Why is there still another day?]

[The ninth day of the fifth month. We're going home, we're going home!]

[The sixteenth day of the fifth month. Xiao Mo passed the Juren examination. Everyone's praising him. I never thought Xiao Mo really was Wen Qu Star descended to earth, though I don't know what Wen Qu Star is.

That county magistrate said he wanted to marry his daughter to Xiao Mo. I'm so unhappy. I don't want to leave Xiao Mo, and I don't want him to be with another girl. I don't know why I feel this way.

But Xiao Mo said he wouldn't marry the county magistrate's daughter. He's going to the city tomorrow to turn the magistrate down. I'm so happy.

But I have to work hard, and try to become better than every other woman in the world.

Then Xiao Mo won't be able to bear letting me go, and he won't marry another woman.]

After closing Bai Ruxue's diary, which looked more like a ledger, Xiao Mo looked toward the pillow on the bed.

"Xiao Mo, you can scold me or hit me, but you can't make me leave.

"If there ever comes a day when you really can't stand me anymore, just put this snake scale under my pillow.

"The next day, I'll pretend nothing happened and sneak away."

Ruxue's words from that time echoed in Xiao Mo's mind.

"Big stinker! Big meanie!"

"I'm not talking to you for two whole days!"

"Stinky Xiao Mo!"

"Mean Xiao Mo!"

On a boulder halfway up She Mountain, Bai Ruxue picked up one little stone after another and tossed them ahead of her.

"I never want to see you again!"

"Forever. A month and seven days! Forget it. Three days, then."

"Big stinker!" Bai Ruxue stood up and shouted down the mountain. "I don't want to see you for the next three days! Go hungry, then!"

After shouting, Bai Ruxue sat back down, wrapped her arms tightly around herself, and buried her head between her knees.

"Then I guess it'd be better if I came to find you three days from now?"

It had been less than ten breaths since the girl finished shouting.

Xiao Mo emerged from the darkness and walked toward Bai Ruxue one step at a time.

At the sound of Xiao Mo's voice, Bai Ruxue's delicate body trembled. She hurried to her feet and made to run into the woods.

"Don't run." Xiao Mo caught her slender wrist just in time. "If you run again, I really won't be able to find you."

"I don't want you to find me." Bai Ruxue pouted and carelessly wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes.

"But if you're not here, who'll cook for me?" Xiao Mo smiled. "You don't want to watch me go hungry, do you?"

"Hmph." Bai Ruxue huffed, lowered her head, and muttered, "Starve to death, you big stinker."

Xiao Mo smiled, took Bai Ruxue by her soft, pale shoulders, and turned her to face him. He wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes with his fingers. "Don't be mad. I really wasn't making you leave."

"Really?"

"Really." Xiao Mo nodded. "But, Ruxue, do you truly not want to go to Tian Xuan Sect?"

Bai Ruxue lifted her misty eyes. "If I go, will you come with me?"

Xiao Mo shook his head. "I'm afraid that'll be difficult. I'm just a scholar, and I don't have any talent for cultivation."

"Then I won't go!" Bai Ruxue sniffled.

"Ruxue, cultivating at Tian Xuan Sect is something countless people dream of. Becoming an immortal is incredibly difficult, and you have this chance."

"But Xiao Mo, so what?"

Bai Ruxue's peach-blossom eyes gazed at Xiao Mo.

"If I became an immortal but didn't have you, what would be the point?

"There was no immortal path I wanted to walk without you."