Charlie quietly climbed out of his warm bed, moving with the utmost care.
His roommates' snores rose and fell, while Ernie was still mumbling something about Victoria's Secret in his sleep.
[Your Majesty stayed out all night, Incompetent Ruler Points +1!]
The system notification instantly perked Charlie up.
He carefully pushed open the dormitory door and slipped into the common room.
The warm yellow lights had already been extinguished, leaving only the faint flames dancing in the fireplace.
Charlie felt around until he found the barrel entrance leading to the corridor, then carefully crawled out.
He climbed up the stone steps, preparing to head straight for the Fourth Floor.
The more Dumbledore forbade him from going there, the more Incompetent Ruler Points he would surely gain by breaking the rules.
As for the danger and all that, if the place was truly so dangerous, would Dumbledore have allowed it to remain there?
Based on what Charlie knew about the teaching profession, all that talk of danger and gruesome death was just meant to scare people.
It was just like how teachers were always saying, "If you don't study hard, you're finished," or, "If you don't do your homework, you're finished."
(Students study hard and improve every day. This guy had a system and cheats.)
Even if there really was some danger, Charlie was confident that he could deal with it with the help of the system.
But Hogwarts' staircases refused to follow any normal rules.
He had only reached the second floor when the stone steps beneath his feet began to shake.
Charlie jumped in fright and hurriedly grabbed the railing. The staircase slowly turned in another direction, carrying him to a completely unfamiliar corridor.
"What the hell?"
Charlie frowned as he looked around.
All the portraits here were snoring away, while moonlight spilled through the glass windows onto the floor, making the place seem especially quiet.
Charlie pressed on despite his misgivings, hoping to find the way to the Fourth Floor.
Instead, after walking for a while, he encountered another moving staircase.
This time, it went even further, sending him straight to some corner on an unknown floor.
"Is this blasted staircase cursed?" Charlie couldn't help grumbling.
"Little Wizard, shouldn't you be sleeping obediently instead of running around?"
A voice suddenly came from beside him, startling Charlie.
He whipped around, thinking a teacher had caught him red-handed, only to discover that the knight in a portrait on the wall was speaking to him.
The plump knight wore silver armor and was leaning lazily against the frame.
"Judging by your age, you must be a new Little Wizard. Sneaking around on your very first night—you must be a Gryffindor student."
"I'm a Huf—"
Charlie had a sudden inspiration and put on a solemn expression.
"That's right, I'm a Gryffindor student."
"Hahahahahaha." The knight roared with laughter.
"I knew it. The Little Wizards from your house have never been good at following the rules."
"But I like it. That's the spirit of a brave knight!"
Charlie seized the opportunity and climbed right up the ladder:
"Then, esteemed Sir Knight, could you tell me how to get to the Fourth Floor?"
The knight was pleased by Charlie's words. He raised a finger and pointed toward the corridor on the left. "Go that way. When you come across a staircase turning right, go up it. When you come across one turning left, keep going straight."
But halfway through his explanation, his hand suddenly paused, then pointed toward the right instead. "No, no, it should be that way."
Charlie didn't think much of it and merely assumed that the knight was a little muddle-headed.
After all, he was a portrait. He had been hanging there for hundreds of years, so it was normal for his mind to be a little foggy.
"Thank you, Sir Knight."
Charlie waved at the knight and hurried down the corridor on the right.
In the Headmaster's Office, Dumbledore was chuckling at the portrait on the wall.
"Little fellow, I can't let anyone enter there right now. No one."
An old Wizard poked his head out from another portrait nearby:
"Albus, if you don't want anyone to go in, why did you mention it in the first place?"
Dumbledore stroked his long beard.
"Because I only want a specific person to enter."
"All right, all right, you're the headmaster." The old Wizard shrugged.
"Of course, what you say goes. If you want the stairs to turn this way, they turn this way. If you want a door to remain unopened, it remains unopened."
A cunning glint flashed through Dumbledore's eyes.
"Some things need to happen at the proper time."
Meanwhile, Charlie was still stumbling through Hogwarts' maze.
He followed the Fat Friar's directions, but the farther he went, the more wrong things seemed.
Why did this corridor look more and more familiar?
When he reached the end, Charlie was dumbfounded.
Those large barrels were right ahead, and beyond them was the Hufflepuff Common Room.
He had actually gone around in a huge circle and returned to the first floor!
"Fuck!" Charlie couldn't help swearing.
"That deadbeat fat knight actually tricked me!"
His teeth ached with rage, and he turned around to settle the score with that portrait.
If I don't tear that frame apart today, I'll write Harry Potter's name backward!
But before he could take two steps, a door beside him suddenly opened.
Two hands reached out and dragged Charlie inside.
"Shh!"
A familiar voice rang out. Charlie took a closer look and discovered that it was the Weasley family's Twins.
Fred and George were staring at him with sly expressions, their eyes filled with excitement.
"I told you, Charlie would definitely sneak out in the middle of the night."
Fred sounded smug.
"All right, you win. I thought he'd be too tired today and would turn in early."
George spread his hands helplessly.
Charlie asked in confusion, "What are you two doing here?"
"Of course we came specifically to find you. Remember? We talked about it on the train."
George glanced toward the direction Charlie had come from and asked suspiciously,
"How did you come from that direction? Isn't the Hufflepuff Common Room over there?"
Charlie spread his hands helplessly.
"Don't ask. I originally wanted to go look at the Fourth Floor, but I got lost in the castle. I asked a knight in a portrait for directions, and that deadbeat fat knight pointed me in the exact opposite direction. I went around in a huge circle and ended up back here."
Fred and George exchanged a glance, both unable to hold back their laughter.
"Hahaha, the Fat Friar tricked you!" Fred slapped his thigh and laughed.
"Oh, that must have been Sir Cadogan. That guy really isn't very bright." George explained.
"But you wanted to go to that place on the Fourth Floor?"
"Of course. The more Dumbledore forbids me from going, the more I want to take a look." Excitement flashed in Charlie's eyes.
Fred raised an eyebrow.
"Great minds think alike! We wanted to go to the Fourth Floor too, but we came away with nothing."
"What happened?" Charlie asked curiously.
George sighed.
"On every route leading to the corridor on the right side of the Fourth Floor, there's always a door that won't open. Either it's sealed by magic, or the staircase suddenly changes direction."
Charlie froze.
Could there really be something dangerous in that place?
Was this white-bearded old man Dumbledore really that devious?
[Your Majesty disrespected his elders and slandered his Grand Tutor, Incompetent Ruler Points +1!]
Fine. System, you're even more devious.
[...]
The system chose to remain silent. Charlie pursed his lips and turned to the Twins. "What are you planning to do now?"
A mischievous glint flashed through George's eyes.
"We're planning to give Filch a little surprise."
"The caretaker?" Charlie recalled the figure standing behind the professors at dinner. He had heard that Filch's reputation was particularly terrible.
"That's right!" Fred rubbed his hands together excitedly.
"Old Mr. Filch especially targeted us last term. He blamed every bad thing on us."
"Although, to be fair, we did cause a lot of it..." George picked up the thread.
"Even though we found some good stuff in his room..."
"That doesn't stop us from properly thanking him with an Explosive Toilet Seat."
Charlie's eyes instantly lit up. "Count me in."
The three of them hit it off immediately and began to act.
Fred and George were clearly much more familiar with Hogwarts' routes. They led Charlie through a series of twists and turns, and soon they reached the area near Filch's quarters.
"See that bathroom over there?" George pointed at a door across the corridor.
"It was supposed to be a public bathroom, but Filch always uses it, so all the students avoid it."
"So now it's basically his private bathroom." Fred spoke viciously.
"He deserves to learn a lesson."
Charlie nodded and followed the two of them as they crept toward the door.
Fred pulled an ordinary-looking toilet seat from inside his robes, though a faint magical glow shimmered across it.
"Once someone sits on it, it'll explode into paint of every color," George whispered.
"And ordinary methods can't wash this paint off. It takes at least a week for the color to fade."
"Where did you get something like this?"
Charlie couldn't help giving them a thumbs-up. Such a brilliant idea was practically a special weapon for an Incompetent Ruler.
"George and I developed it together." George looked extremely proud.
This was beyond Charlie's expectations. The two of them were still students, yet they could already create such ingenious prank devices. Give them another two years and they'll be unstoppable.
They're practically my Minister of Works.
The three of them quietly pushed open the bathroom door. As expected, there was no one inside.
Fred swiftly removed the original toilet seat and replaced it with their specially made one.
Just then, a sharp, ear-piercing laugh suddenly rang out.
"Hahaha! Little Wizards are up to no good! Little Wizards are up to no good!"
Peeves suddenly emerged from the ceiling and pointed at the three of them, shouting loudly.
"Damn it!" Fred's expression changed.
"That bastard Peeves!" George panicked as well.
Charlie reacted the fastest. His Wand instantly appeared in his hand.
"Tongue-Tying Curse!"
He had no idea whether the spell would work on this suddenly appearing creature, but he might as well try.
A beam of blue light shot toward Peeves and struck him precisely.
Peeves opened his mouth to continue shouting, only to discover that he couldn't make a sound.
He covered his mouth in terror and flipped through the air.
Fred and George looked delighted.
"Nicely done, Charlie!"
But Charlie's expression was solemn.
"That noise definitely woke Filch. We need to leave, now!"
Sure enough, Filch's furious roar and hurried footsteps came from the distance.
"Which little bastard is making all that noise? Stop right there!"
The three of them immediately rushed out of the bathroom and began fleeing wildly under Fred and George's guidance.
"This way!" Fred pointed toward a side corridor.
The three of them charged into the narrow passage, followed by another series of twists and turns.
Charlie became completely disoriented and could only follow the Weasley brothers as they ran for their lives.
Fortunately, the two of them truly knew the castle's layout like the backs of their hands. They soon left Filch far behind.
Only after confirming that they were safe did the three of them stop to catch their breath.
"We did it!" George waved his fist excitedly.
"The moment Filch sits on that toilet tomorrow will be absolutely spectacular!" Fred looked just as expectant.
Charlie imagined the scene and couldn't help laughing.
[Your Majesty teased the Imperial Guard and damaged public property, Incompetent Ruler Points +2!]
The system's prompt put Charlie in an even better mood.
But the bigger one would have to wait until Filch triggered the bomb tomorrow.
After this collaboration, the three of them had clearly grown much closer.
"Charlie, that spell you used just now was really good," Fred praised.
"Not at all. If there are any more activities like this, remember to call me."
"You're already looking forward to the next one? You've got quite the appetite, kid."
"Don't worry. The two of us will definitely do our best to satisfy you."
The three of them chatted for a while longer. Fred and George then took Charlie around to show him the castle's various secret passages and shortcuts.
Charlie carefully memorized every location. This information would be very useful for his future nighttime wandering.
Time slipped by unnoticed. When a faint glow appeared on the horizon, the three of them realized that dawn was almost here.
"We should head back. If we don't return to the dormitory now, we'll be found out." George glanced out the window as he spoke.
Fred patted Charlie on the shoulder.
"We had a great time tonight. Remember to call us if you find any interesting activities in the future."
"No problem." Charlie nodded with a smile.
"You two, too. Don't forget me if you find anything fun."
The three of them parted at a fork in the corridor, each returning to the dormitory of his own house.
After entering the Gryffindor Common Room, Fred sighed.
"Charlie really should've come to Gryffindor."
"Exactly. The Sorting Hat must be senile. How else could it have sorted him into Hufflepuff?"
"I think the one who really should've been sorted into Hufflepuff is Ron."
The two exchanged a glance, then burst out laughing.
Charlie tiptoed back to the Hufflepuff common room and then returned to the dormitory.
His roommates were still fast asleep. Ernie was even talking in his sleep.
Charlie took off his outer clothes and slipped into the warm blankets.
"Little System, start drawing!"
"Give me one draw at a time."
[Your Majesty, drawing one at a time is exhausting. We can do a series draw.]
"No. Give me one draw at a time."
[Tyrant Points +1.]
"Are you insulting me?"
[This humble one wouldn't dare.]
"Hurry up and draw."
[Congratulations, Your Majesty. You drew Levitation Charm proficiency +20.]
[Congratulations, Your Majesty. You drew Flock of Birds proficiency +100.]
Accompanied by the system's voice, Charlie gradually fell asleep.
As a result, he didn't hear the things he drew afterward.
[Congratulations, Your Majesty. You drew Animagus (self-selected form).]
Before you continue