Could You Let Me Eat in Peace?

For some reason, True Lord Yellow Mountain felt inexplicably moved after hearing Song Shuhang's words. Recalling Senior White's personality... it seemed that venturing into the universe wasn't impossible.

"I understand. I will prepare everything you need," True Lord Yellow Mountain assured him.

Finally, he added a reminder: "By the way, whatever you do, don't let Doudou go on the plane with you. It's been asking to go to driving lessons, and if it gets on the plane, who knows what might happen! Absolutely don't let it get involved with airplanes!"

"Senior Yellow Mountain, you're overthinking it." Song Shuhang sighed and said, "Even Doudou doesn't want to come with me and Senior White to learn how to fly, so you can rest assured."

Previously, Doudou only gave him a single dog hair to save his life. Even Doudou knows what might happen if he learns to fly with Senior White, right?

"Is that so? If that's true, then all the better," True Lord Yellow Mountain replied—had Doudou really changed her personality?

In True Lord Yellow Mountain's impression, Doudou was simply a troublemaker; it would be unwilling to leave without getting involved in something like learning to fly.

Could it be that after spending some time with Shuhang, Doudou has been influenced by Shuhang and stopped causing trouble? If so, that would be wonderful.

When he first got Doudou, he was drawn to the Pekingese because they were cute and docile, unlike the overly energetic Huskies. But somehow, Doudou suddenly turned into a goofball. What happened in between? True Lord Yellow Mountain still can't figure it out.

Just as True Lord Yellow Mountain was pondering, a pleasant sound came from outside his cave. It was the sound of a fellow cultivator coming to visit, triggering the cave's protective talisman, which functioned like a doorbell.

True Lord Yellow Mountain activated a mirror, which lit up like a computer screen, displaying the scene at the entrance of the cave.

There, a beautiful ＠＃％×Fairy smiled. As if sensing that True Lord Yellow Mountain was watching her, she waved her little hand and said with a smile, "Senior Yellow Mountain, I've come to visit you!"

"Oh, it's Fairy Lychee! What brings you here today?" True Lord Yellow Mountain laughed and opened the seal on the cave talisman.

The Fairy Lychee has a sweet smile and looks completely innocent...

*********************

On the other hand, after ending his call with True Lord Yellow Mountain, Song Shuhang searched online for some tips on flying airplanes, such as "how to protect yourself in the event of an air crash" and "how to use a parachute".

Although we have Senior White's flying sword and Doudou's dog hair, it's always better to be prepared. Opportunity favors the prepared mind!

Then he took a deep breath, tried his best to maintain a cheerful smile, and went downstairs to eat.

Because he forgot to bring back "Empty Thieves' Sect's Tangtang" when he returned home from the "Five-Finger Mountain Sealing Restriction Grounds" last time, the quality of breakfast, lunch and dinner at Song Shuhang's house has been declining.

Breakfast was brought back from outside by Senior White: several servings of soy milk, steamed buns, fried dough sticks, porridge, pickled vegetables...

There are quite a few tricks up their sleeves.

As for why Senior White thought of buying breakfast?

Song Shuhang turned to look at Senior White.

Senior White was swiping on his tablet, sensed something, looked up, his cheeks puffed out, and said, "Thump thump thump thump..."

There were several boxes of bayberries next to Venerable White, it seemed that the breakfast was brought by the senior on his way.

However, Senior, haven't you gotten tired of the bayberries yet? And I must say, cultivators' bodies are really amazing. If an ordinary person ate this many bayberries, their teeth would be sore from the acid. Senior White, however, continued to eat with great relish.

Song Shuhang sat up, reached for a piece of white bread, and casually asked, "Senior, has Guoguo come out for breakfast?"

"He's in the bathroom, been there for ages," Senior White replied.

It's been a long time? Looks like your hemorrhoids are pretty bad. No wonder you couldn't resist coming out for surgery.

"Guoguo, just a reminder, make sure you wipe your bottom clean, otherwise your hemorrhoids will get worse," Song Shuhang casually remarked.

Sitting for long periods can cause hemorrhoids, and so can not wiping your bottom properly; these are common knowledge.

"Huh? This will worsen hemorrhoids?" came the little monk's exclamation from the bathroom.

"Yes, that's why hygiene is very important." Song Shuhang grabbed a fried dough stick, wrapped the white bread in it, and took a bite. This was his favorite way to eat it.

He then turned on the television in the living room, randomly selected a few channels, and checked what news was on.

After switching channels several times, when he finally found the Jiangnan Region) channel, the news on the screen caught his attention.

The television is showing an interview program.

On the left is a middle-aged man wearing glasses, with an air of self-importance.

On the right is a beautiful female host, wearing sexy black stockings, conducting a question-and-answer interview with an expert.

"Professor Liu, as a leading authority in geology, we have a question we'd like to ask you. This question has been troubling many residents in the Jiangnan Region," the female host said with a smile. "It's about the huge sinkhole that suddenly appeared near the Electronics City in the Jiangnan Region on July 1st. What exactly happened?"

Song Shuhang froze, his mouth agape as he bit into his bread. The female host was talking about Senior White's masterpiece, wasn't she? That massive sinkhole that was created when he tripped and fell.

There's been a lot of discussion online about that huge pit.

For example, someone shouted at the top of their lungs: This is definitely not an ordinary sinkhole, because there has never been such a neat sinkhole before. It is generally circular and spreads outward from the center point! Compared to a sinkhole, this is obviously more like a meteorite crater.

But calling it a meteorite crater is impossible. In broad daylight, no He Ren saw any trace of a meteorite falling from the sky, and there were no signs of flames from the impact in the crater.

In short, this matter has been the subject of much discussion and conflicting opinions in the Jiangnan Region.

"The problem is undoubtedly a subsidence!" Professor Liu stated firmly.

Then, he began to speak eloquently, introducing the composition of the subsidence, such as excessive mining of underground minerals, excessive extraction of groundwater, and so on, describing it in great detail.

The topic veered off course and unknowingly turned into a lecture on the science of 'land subsidence,' then into a critique of the evils of capitalists who overexploit underground resources, and then unknowingly into how to protect the environment and how everyone has a responsibility.

The professor was lecturing with great enthusiasm, but the audience was completely baffled.

The female host's inner monologue at that moment was. "Damn it! Where did this tangent come from? Get back to the point and summarize it in under twenty words!"

But she couldn't voice her true feelings; she had to put on an act of "Professor Liu is absolutely right," and occasionally chime in with agreement. Being a host can be tough sometimes.

"Alright, let's just call it a sinkhole." Song Shuhang sighed inwardly, and not only him, but many residents in the Jiangnan Region also sighed in the same way.

Professor Liu won!

At this moment, Senior White looked up at the TV and laughed, "Hey, isn't this the dent I accidentally made?"

"No, Senior White. This is a sinkhole!" Song Shuhang turned around and said seriously, "This is a sinkhole caused by the evil capitalists constantly exploiting underground resources. As for why the sinkhole looks like a meteorite crater, Professor Liu will definitely explain!"

"Oh, I see." Senior White nodded. "So, in the future, if I accidentally make a crater, I won't need to use the 'Earth-Leveling Spell' anymore, right?"

"Senior White!" Song Shuhang gave a thumbs up. "Yes, that's it!"

Then he picked up the fried dough stick and bread again and took a big bite.

Experts can be very useful sometimes...

He took another big bite of the fried dough stick sandwich.

Just then... the bathroom door opened.

The little Guoguo looked very serious, and then, with his bare bottom exposed, he quickly ran to Song Shuhang.

Song Shuhang looked puzzled. What was this little guy doing?

Guoguo running to Shuhang's side, Guoguo turned around, stuck out her little bottom, and asked, "Senior Brother Shuhang, can you quickly check if I've wiped my bottom clean?"

Song Shuhang turned his head and saw Guoguo's little bottom, and those hemorrhoids. "..."

Shuhang was completely dumbfounded!

Can't a person even eat in peace?

Then, when he looked down, he saw the fried dough stick in his hand. It was golden and looked like a big, thick stick. Oh no, he'd lost his appetite.

"Senior Brother Shuhang?" Little Guoguo turned her head in confusion.

"It's very clean." Song Shuhang chuckled dryly, "Come on, wash your hands and let's eat."

"Okay." The little monk pulled up his pants and rushed back to the bathroom.

Song Shuhang tossed the fried dough sticks aside and silently began munching on white bread. Without the fried dough sticks, the white bread was only slightly sweet and not very palatable.

Soon, the little Guoguo rushed back. "Brother Shuhang, what's for breakfast?"

"Soy milk, fried dough sticks, bread, porridge, and pickled vegetables are all available. You can choose whatever you like," Song Shuhang said, pointing to the table.

"Huh? Is this all the food we're going to eat? Don't we eat 'Spirit Rice balls' or 'Sweet Dew Liquid'?" The little monk looked up at Song Shuhang in confusion.

Spirit Rice balls, Sweet Dew Liquid?

These are things that only elite disciples of sects would use. Where would a mere rogue cultivator like him get them? Song Shuhang sighed deeply, "I don't have any here."

As he spoke, he turned to look at Senior White.

Senior White: "Rat-a-tat-tat-tat..."

Then Senior White explained, "Well, Spirit Rice is rice grown with the help of magic, and it contains spiritual energy. Sweet Dew Liquid is also the juice of a spiritual plant. Cultivators in the Body Tempering Stage can increase their Blood Qi by eating these grains containing spiritual energy, thus accelerating their cultivation. When do you have time? I'll take you to plant two acres. I used to do it, and I miss it so much."

"Thank you very much, senior!" Song Shuhang said with a smile.

The young monk seemed to understand Song Shuhang's embarrassment. He put his palms together and chanted a Buddhist prayer. "It's alright, Senior Brother Shuhang. Even if it's just ordinary breakfast, I won't mind."

After a pause, he asked again, "Shuhang, are these fried dough sticks fried in vegetable oil or animal fat?"

Song Shuhang, tears streaming down his face, said, "I don't know."

"Oh, then I can't eat it, I can't break the rules." The little Guoguo grabbed the bread and silently started munching on it, just like Song Shuhang.

For some reason, Song Shuhang felt a deep melancholy...