The Savages' Enlightenment Problem

This forged "Limitless Pursuit Order" was merely bait used by Gongzi Hai to lure the "masked man" into attacking Song Shuhang...

"Honestly, can't you even use your brain for a second? Would Limitless Pursuit Order's be printed on ordinary white paper? Heh." Gongzi Hai controlled the slightly overweight middle-aged man, tearing up the so-called 'Limitless Pursuit Order'.

Then, he reached out and grabbed the small gold hairpin behind his head, and gently tugged it.

With the hairpin pulled down, his connection with the middle-aged man was severed.

The middle-aged man, clutching the gold hairpin, slumped back to the ground, unconscious—when he awoke, he would at most think he was drunk and had spent the night on the rooftop. Perhaps he would even feel pleased to have a small gold hairpin in his hand?

Meanwhile, in Song Shuhang's Room.

Venerable White's lips curled into a slight smile, revealing a hint of pleasure. "So you're from the Boundless Limitless Demon Sect. I've always wanted to find out where their headquarters are hidden... Perhaps this time, I'll find a clue."

The Mental Intimidation of the Venerable White was far more than that.

*********************

The next morning.

Song Shuhang slept until eight o'clock before waking up.

The commotion last night had left him exhausted, and he ended up sleeping a little longer than usual.

"Awake?" Senior White turned around and smiled.

At this moment, Senior White was watching a movie on his computer while chatting in the group.

The movie is -- holy crap, it's the Fast & Furious Series! Song Shuhang really wanted to pounce on him and have Senior White change the movie to a 'Safe Driving Traffic Law Video'.

Then, several senior members started to chime in the group.

As Senior White turned to the side, Song Shuhang happened to see the Manor Lord Seven Lives Talisman on the screen asking for help, "Fellow Daoists in the group, could someone send me a Chinese language teacher? I'm so worried!"

"Pfft..." Song Shuhang burst out laughing as soon as he saw those words.

What does it mean to send a Chinese language teacher over?

Senior, a language arts teacher is a human being, not an object; you can't send them by courier...

Wait a minute, Soft Feather and Su Clan’s Sixteen sent themselves here by express delivery. Could it be that, in the minds of the seniors in the group, express delivery can be used to send people?

The Dharma King Creation: "Fellow Daoist Qisheng, what happened? Why do you need to send it to your Chinese teacher?"

Sure enough, the more experienced members of the group were curious about "why send it to a Chinese teacher," rather than "is it even permissible to send a Chinese teacher?" Their understanding of "courier services" is clearly flawed!

This is a very serious problem; it could even lead to someone's death.

At this moment, Northern River's Loose Cultivator spoke up, "In my still-present memories, I vaguely recall that you, Fellow Daoist Qisheng, were teaching the local savages to read on a small island in this world? Could it be that there was a problem during the literacy process?"

"Sigh, don't even mention it. These savages are as dumb as dogs! I finally managed to teach them to memorize the Three Character Classic, and the moment I turned my back, they'd forgotten it all."

No matter how hard I slap their palms or hang them up to beat them, it's no use.

Even now, these savages' pronunciation is still completely inaccurate, and they often recite the wrong order. It's been almost two months, and they still often recite the first line of the Three Character Classic as. "At the beginning of life, people grind tofu!" Grind some kind of ash! I have never taught them like that, okay?!"The Manor Lord Seven Lives Talisman collapsed.

No sooner had he finished speaking than an ID popped up in the Nine Provinces Number One Group.

A user with the ID 'Little Doudou, Master of Yellow Mountain Big Fool' commented. "Woof woof, Qisheng, I can't pretend I didn't hear what you just said! What do you mean 'stupid as a dumb dog'? I'll bite you! Woof woof!"

Manor Lord Seven Lives Talisman: "..."

Little Doudou, Master of Yellow Mountain Big Fool: "Woof woof, Doudou! Quickly apologize to me and all the demon dogs in the world, or I'll bite you to death!"

Manor Lord Seven Lives Talisman: "@True Lord Yellow Mountain, your Doudou is out."

True Lord Yellow Mountain appeared quickly, but only with a string of speechless colons. "..."

Manor Lord Seven Lives Talisman: "Look at the name of your Doudou."

True Lord Yellow Mountain: "..."

Northern River's Loose Cultivator laughed loudly, "@Shushan is under a lot of pressure, is Doudou by your side?"

Mad Saber Three Waves: "Doudou's ID, hahaha, I'm dying of laughter. When did Doudou become the owner of Yellow Mountain Big Fool?"

Northern River's Loose Cultivator: "... Fellow Three Waves. [Goodbye waving emoji]"

Mad Saber Three Waves: "?"

Mad Saber Three Waves: "Damn it, I copied Doudou's ID directly to send the message, and something went wrong."

System notification: [Mad Saber Three Waves has retracted a message]

Three Waves quickly retracted the first message.

Mad Saber Three Waves quickly added, "Senior Yellow Mountain, you saw it too, I didn't mean it. Please forgive me this time, considering it was unintentional and you withdrew so quickly?" He added a cute emoji.

"Hehe," said True Lord Yellow Mountain, "Too late."

[System message: (******) Mad Saber Three Waves has been muted by group owner True Lord Yellow Mountain for 1 hour.]

It was late, but Mad Saber Three Waves was only imprisoned for an hour.

Venerable White turned his head and glanced at the chat history in the group, nodding in satisfaction. "The fellow Daoists in the group are still having a great time. That's wonderful."

"Having fun?" Song Shuhang chuckled dryly, feeling this was part of Senior Three Waves's daily routine of constantly courting death. "Wait, Senior, can I borrow your computer for a moment?"

"Okay." Senior White stood up from his chair.

Song Shuhang quickly Dao Initiation using Senior White's chat account. "Doudou, where are you now! Come back to me right now, immediately, with the little monk!!"

Little Doudou, Master of Yellow Mountain Big Fool: "You scared me to death! I thought Senior White had gone berserk, but it turns out it was you Shuhang, using Senior White's account? Tsk tsk, Shuhang, you are so young and naive—come and get me if you dare!"

Then, Little Doudou, Master of Yellow Mountain Big Fool, said, "Senior Brother Song, I am Guoguo. If you don't beat the shit out of me, I might consider going back early! But you have to promise and swear to everyone in the group."

Song Shuhang gritted his teeth. "Heh heh heh, you two are really something!"

Little Doudou, Master of Yellow Mountain Big Fool: "Catch me! Catch me! Like Yellow Mountain Big Fool, if you have the guts, take me back!"

Wandering Monk Profound Principle: "..."

Wandering Monk Profound Principle: "[Sweat-wiping emoji] [Kitchen knife emoji]"

The Wandering Monk Profound Principle silently logged off.

When the little monk Guoguo, who was far away, saw Master Profound Principle's two expressions, his face turned pale with fright—he had forgotten that Abbot Profound Principle was also in the group. What should he do? In that case, not only would Senior Brother Shuhang beat him until he shit himself, Master Profound Principle would definitely beat him until he pissed himself!

True Lord Yellow Mountain: "Little friend Shuhang, I will have someone bring Doudou and the Guoguo monk Guoguo back. Well then, that's all for now."

Then, True Lord Yellow Mountain used his group owner privileges to change Doudou's name.

Then, the True Lord cast his Grand Silencing Technique.

[System message notification: (******) Little Doudou, True Monarch Yellow Mountain’s Loyal Hound, and have been banned from speaking for 1 day by the group owner True Lord Yellow Mountain.]

Song Shuhang: "..."

True Lord Yellow Mountain deserves a lot of credit for Doudou becoming such a goofball, right?

The farce caused by Doudou ended with Doudou and Mad Saber Three Waves being banned from speaking, and the little monk receiving a "pale-faced" package from Master Profound Principle.

Manor Lord Seven Lives Talisman: "Don't get off-topic, Doudou is leading us astray. Speaking of which, can anyone send me a Chinese language teacher? I need one urgently! I'm completely at my wit's end with these savages. If this continues, I feel like I'm going to commit a blood feud! The sword in my hand is trembling; I'm almost at my limit."

Song Shuhang hurriedly replied using Venerable White's account, "Just a reminder, senior, you can't use express delivery to send people. A Chinese teacher isn't a commodity; you can't send them by express delivery... it'll kill them!"

"Don't worry about the details! If all else fails, just send a Chinese language teacher over by plane! Anyway, help me solve this problem!" The Manor Lord Seven Lives Talisman was clearly driven to the brink of collapse by those savages.

The Dharma King Creation said, "Does anyone have investments in school properties? We could send a teacher over. I remember a fellow Daoist in the group... I think his name is Drunk Sun? This fellow Daoist's cultivation method is too strange; I can never remember his full name. Anyway, it's him. Doesn't he own several school properties? Elementary, middle, and all the way up to university!"

The named Drunk Moon Hermit silently popped his head out. "..."

The Drunk Moon Hermit was quite melancholy. His cultivation method was unique, and he couldn't Manifestation Before All until he reached the Eighth-Grade Profound Sage. As a result, he was often inexplicably ignored by his fellow Daoists in the group.

Before he knew it, he had become the number one nobody in the 'Nine Provinces Number One Group'.

No matter how much he tries to make his presence known, no matter what comments he posts in the group chat, no matter how much he floods the group, his fellow Daoists often inexplicably can't remember him.

Although I know it's due to my own cultivation method, I'm still a little depressed...

Drunk Moon Hermit: "I'm truly sorry that I can't make sure you all remember my Daoist name. Alas. I do have connections with a few schools, but it's summer vacation now, and the teachers have long since gone on holiday. I'll try to contact some schools for Fellow Daoist Qisheng; perhaps if the pay is generous, a Chinese language teacher will be willing to go abroad to teach the savages Chinese on that island... However, I can't guarantee success!"

"I am deeply grateful, Fellow Daoist Drunk Sun!" The Manor Lord Seven Lives Talisman's eyes welled with tears. "I will never forget your great kindness and virtue."

Drunk Moon Hermit: "Fellow Daoist Qisheng, I am Drunk Moon! Alas... I do not ask for eternal forgiveness, I only ask that you remember my Daoist name!"

Manor Lord Seven Lives Talisman: "[Shy expression]"

At this moment, Song Shuhang thought for a moment and then asked using Senior White's account, "Senior Qisheng, I would like to ask if you teach the savages to use 'pinyin'? If you use pinyin, it might be easier for them to remember the characters?"

"Pinyin... I actually forgot about that." The Manor Lord Seven Lives Talisman chuckled dryly. There was nothing he could do; when he was learning Chinese characters, his early education consisted of classic texts like the Three Character Classic.

Song Shuhang silently mourned for the group of savages whose hands were slapped and who were beaten...