The First Chapter

Qing City Tieba

Post: My Suffocating Fellow Patients

Posted by: jiojio repeatedly testing the entrance of the psychiatric hospital

1F (OP): I wonder if any fellow patients have experienced the VIP rooms at Qing City Second Hospital? If you have, no need to raise your hand, because you definitely haven't had an experience as bizarre as the OP's.

Here's the thing, I had to stay in the hospital for a few days due to a minor illness, so I casually picked a VIP room. Coincidentally, on the day I checked in, both rooms on either side of me also got occupants. Thus, I gained two fellow patients, you can call them Old Man A and Old Man B.

2F: Casually getting a VIP room? OP must be short, rich, and ugly.

3F: Upstairs, don't cause trouble. Did Old Man A and Old Man B take a fancy to OP's devastating beauty and introduce their unmarried daughters to you?

4F: Introducing daughters is nothing. It's worth posting on Tieba if they introduce their sons to OP.

5F (OP): Friends above, you're too naive. In fact, the protagonists of this story are Old Man A and Old Man B. The OP is just a bystander whose worldview has been shattered.

Old Man B is the dad of a certain business tycoon in Qing City, the kind of person you can find with a Baidu search. I heard he broke his leg and was admitted to the hospital. When I saw him, I only dared to observe from a distance, afraid of being kicked out by the bodyguards in sunglasses at the sickroom door if I got too close. I was really scared.

Then there's Old Man A. Old Man A looks even healthier than me. He supposedly twisted his back and is staying for a few days. He has a granddaughter under twenty taking care of him. By the way, the granddaughter is very cute.

6F: If OP is writing a novel, they've already been kicked out by the readers. Neither of these two floors gets to the point. Are you a chatterbox spirit?

7F: Brother upstairs, don't be so agitated. Calm down.

8F (OP): Cough, cough, the point, the point is, on the second day of hospitalization, which is today, Old Man A ran into Old Man B's son, the business tycoon, in the hallway.

Then Old Man A told the business tycoon that dark clouds were hanging over him, and his whole family would face a disaster involving bloodshed soon.

I was watching not far away at the time, thinking whether the tycoon's whole family would face a disaster involving bloodshed was uncertain, but he might face one himself very soon.

As expected, the tycoon was very angry. However, out of respect for elders and children, he didn't do anything to Old Man A, he just left very angrily.

9F: What is this? Just a story about a scammer failing to scam.

10F: Leaving, leaving. Nothing interesting to see.

11F (OP): Shut up, the twist is coming. At 1 PM this afternoon, the tycoon suddenly went to Old Man A's sickroom. I almost thought he was still angry from the morning and finally decided to beat up Old Man A. But instead, he respectfully invited Old Man A to Old Man B's sickroom.

12F: How does OP know it was an invitation? Maybe it was coercion.

13F (OP): That's impossible. I'm too familiar with that attitude. It's how I usually ask my parents for money. I definitely wouldn't mistake it.

14F: What attitude?

15F: Like a grandson, smoking.jpg

16F (OP): None of this is important. What's important is that the tycoon invited Old Man A over to tell fortunes for Old Man B!

Finding a fortune teller in a hospital is as ridiculous as finding a wife in a wife cake. If he says he's a master, would you believe him?

I don't believe it, but the tycoon's dad does.

The latest news is that Old Man B has offered a high price for Old Man A to tell his fortune...

I'm going to get hemorrhoids removed. I'll continue when I get back.

17F: emmmmm I don't know whether to be shocked by the fortune-telling master or by OP's hemorrhoids.

18F: OP, I suggest you call the police. Uncle police will teach the "fortune-telling master" how to behave.

56F: Has it been a whole day and OP hasn't returned yet?

57F: My guess is OP has already been silenced by the tycoon.

78F (OP): OP is back. I'm speaking to you all in an ORZ posture. Please be patient.

According to the latest news from the nurse, Old Man A said that Old Man B's grandson is lacking metal in his destiny and it's best to change his name. Now, the two of them are in Old Man B's sickroom thinking of a new name for the grandson.

I'm thinking, I could do this too. Just call him Xin. If one isn't enough, use two, Xin Xin.

Three isn't impossible either. A four-character name is trendy. Make up for whatever is lacking. Why pay a sky-high price to change a name?

I used to assume that a man who could give birth to a tycoon must have a very high IQ. Reality has slapped me hard. I need to calm down.

79F: I feel like OP is witnessing a large-scale intelligence-draining event. I really want to go and watch in person.

80F: -_-|| I'm in Qing City. I've already guessed the tycoon's identity. I heard the tycoon's dad was very keen on fortune-telling before, and I didn't expect him to give up his hobby even while hospitalized.

81F: Waiting for the tycoon's name???

Qing City Second Hospital, VIP Room 456.

On the hospital bed, an elderly man in a hospital gown, with rosy cheeks and a vigorous spirit, was peeling an apple.

On the chair beside the bed, a young girl rested her chin on her hands, gazing intently at the apple.

As the fruit knife stopped, a long strip of apple peel fell. The girl quickly reached out. The old man grunted and placed the peeled apple heavily into her hand.

"Thank you, Grandpa."

"Always eating. You're twenty years old and still can't peel an apple. When I'm not here, will you stop eating apples?" The old man wiped the fruit knife clean and set it aside.

Liu Mumu took a bite of the apple and mumbled, "I can find a boyfriend to peel apples for me."

The old man glanced at her and cruelly interrupted her fantasy: "Stop dreaming. Based on my eighty-plus years of fortune-telling experience, your destiny is basically incompatible with romantic relationships."

Liu Mumu immediately became unhappy, pouting, "That's because your calculations are inaccurate. Before we left home, I went to Front Street to have my fortune told by Blind Liu. He said I would definitely find a boyfriend before I turn twenty-five!"

The old man's eyebrows almost shot up. He pointed at Liu Mumu: "Ai ya, you little brat, you actually went to find Blind Liu behind my back? Don't you know who that Blind Liu is? He's my competitor!"

"Oh, Blind Liu might not think so."

The old man immediately clutched his chest.

"I heard he earns twenty times more than our family in a year," Liu Mumu added.

"He doesn't know anything, he's just a liar!" After speaking, the old man paused and then asked, "Is it really that much?"

"Yeah." Liu Mumu took a bite of an apple and sighed, "You say we're all fortune-tellers, but he can make money steadily, while we were driven out of our hometown. Is that normal?"

The old man grumbled and lay flat, pulling the quilt up, not wanting to talk.

The grandfather and granddaughter originally made a living in a northern city. A month ago, her grandfather took on a big job. The client was very satisfied, but after being told the time and place of his rendezvous with his mistress, and having high-definition photos taken, the client's ex-husband, who had already lost half his fortune, was not satisfied. Thus, the grandfather and granddaughter had to pack their bags and flee to Qing City overnight.

Nowadays, fortune-telling has become a high-risk profession.

"Did you tell fortunes for Grandpa Tan again today? Uncle Tan looked at me strangely in the hallway today."

"How strangely?"

"Like I was a liar."

Although Grandpa Tan in Room 458 believed her grandfather, his son was the complete opposite. Not only did he not believe them, Liu Mumu felt he wanted to send the grandfather and granddaughter straight to the police station.

"He doesn't know good from bad," the old man said unhappily.

Liu Mumu continued, "And the young man next door looked at you and Grandpa Tan like you were both mentally ill. Grandpa, please restrain yourself."

"What do they know? Old Tan's facial features suggest his home has likely been subjected to a Feng Shui arrangement. In a few days, his son will also end up in the hospital, and then he'll be begging me."

Liu Mumu crunched on her apple, lost in thought, "There's quite a lot of work in Qing City."

In the small northern city where they used to live, high-end malicious acts like arranging Feng Shui for others were basically unheard of. After all, capable Feng Shui masters would go to big cities to make money. Who would stay put in a small place like her grandfather, unwilling to move?

"Don't even think about making money. You can't even get a divination right, so don't embarrass yourself. Just go to school honestly."

Yes, the main reason the grandfather and granddaughter rushed to Qing City was because Liu Mumu had been admitted to the university here, and she still had to study. Although her divination skills were a bit unscientific, she and her grandfather still believed in science.

"What's wrong with getting a divination wrong? It's not like you've never made a mistake. Both Liu Yao and Meihua Yishu are so difficult, are they things a normal person can learn?" Liu Mumu mumbled guiltily.

Although she had obtained a legitimate Diviner's License, if there were a graduation exam for diviners, she would definitely fail.

Liu Yizhi had taught her for ten years, but still couldn't teach her. His granddaughter, Liu Mumu, was simply the shame of his eighty-year career.

"Alright, don't make me angry anymore. I don't have many days left to live anyway. Listening to you will only shorten my lifespan by two days." Liu Yizhi turned over, not wanting to look at her.

His words silenced Liu Mumu.

After a long while, Liu Yizhi spoke again, "I've already calculated it. Your father is in this city. You'll go find him in a while."

"I won't."

"Your father-daughter bond is not broken. If you don't look for him now, you'll still meet him in the future. You always run away from problems, is that how I taught you?" Liu Yizhi's voice deepened.

Liu Mumu stared at his back, pouted, and after a long time, managed to squeeze out a few words: "I know."

Qing City Tieba

Post -- My Suffocating Fellow Patient

152L (OP): The OP is back. Something terrifying happened. Three days after Old Man A told the Big Boss that his whole family would face a bloody disaster, the Big Boss broke his arm and was hospitalized. Now he's neighbors with his own father.

The OP suddenly felt a bit panicked.

153L: The OP believes in science, all of this is a coincidence!!!

154L: Upstairs, I've always thought fortune-telling was quite scientific. It's all about probability. The I Ching and Bagua have been passed down for thousands of years, so there are still some inevitable causes and effects.

155L: It doesn't prevent current fortune-telling masters from being liars.

156L: Maybe the OP just met someone with real skills.

185L (LZ): Brothers upstairs, stop arguing. The Big Boss just invited Old Man A over. Whether Old Man A has real skills or is a liar, the Big Boss is definitely going to pay him.

The OP secretly inquired. It's said the Big Boss offered Old Man A a seven-figure sum.

186L: Can I earn seven figures in my lifetime? This is f**king ridiculous.

187L: No wonder our city's average income is over ten thousand. My average income is being pulled up like this. I just want to know if Old Man A pays taxes.

310L (LZ): A rather funny piece of news. It's said Old Man A didn't take the Big Boss's money. He asked the Big Boss to arrange his funeral after he dies as payment for the fortune-telling.

The Big Boss agreed.

I have to say, the level of fortune-telling masters is different from ordinary people. Planning ahead, the OP has learned a lot.

666L (LZ): ...Old Man A passed away last night.

What the f**k, is this scientific???