Just Reincarnated, and I'm in Konoha

When Luo Xiao-Zuo awoke from his dream, he heard a voice by his ear:

"A bag of rice has to be carried up how many floors?"

"A bag of rice has to be carried up two floors."

The voice was low and a little hoarse, as if it were coming from his own mouth.

What was going on?

At the same time, a woman's voice shouted from behind another version of himself:

"Wait! Pain!"

That was what she yelled.

Who was Pain? Was she talking about me?

And he seemed to have heard that voice just moments ago! It sounded like Tsunade, the Fifth Hokage of Konoha, Tsunade Senju?

What had happened?

Luo Xiao-Zuo shuddered and "opened" his eyes. Two different scenes appeared before him.

In one scene, very close to "himself," he was standing with his head bowed in a dimly lit "room," muttering about having to "carry rice."

To his left stood a purple-haired woman wearing a paper flower in her hair, her bearing cool and composed. Her name was Konan. At that moment, she was looking at him with worried eyes, her lovely face clouded with concern.

In the other scene, at some distance from him, he was controlling Deva Path Pain, floating in the air with his arms spread wide. Deva Path moved in sync with him, saying exactly the same words as he gathered Chakra. He drifted higher and higher, his presence growing ever more imposing.

The Fifth Hokage, Tsunade, was chasing him, leaping from one rooftop to another. As she pursued him, she shouted in shock and anger, "Pain!"

All around them, black smoke billowed from Konoha. The place looked anything but peaceful.

"A bag of rice, oh, it's so hard to carry."

"A generation of rice wants me to wash it."

The voice by his ear continued. As Deva Path Pain rose higher and higher, Konoha looked smaller and smaller. From his vantage point, it looked like a pile of children's toys—tiny and childish. It gave him the urge to destroy it with a light push, and the feeling that even if he did, he wouldn't regret it in the slightest.

"Wouldn't regret it, my ass! It wouldn't matter if Konoha got pushed over, but I'd die afterward!"

At last, having figured out what was happening, Luo Xiao-Zuo began to fight for control of the body.

Inside Konan's Paper Tree, Nagato was gathering Chakra. He shook his head as memories that weren't his began flooding into his mind, throwing his thoughts into greater and greater disarray.

His own memories told him that he was Nagato Uzumaki, and he was damn well going to carry Konoha's rice! The other memories told him that he was Luo Xiao-Zuo, a Chinese web novelist who'd drunk just one bottle of beer the night before, then shamefully tumbled under his desk. He absolutely could not carry Konoha's rice—if he did, he was dead for sure.

The two consciousnesses silently struggled for control of the body. In the midst of their battle, Deva Path Pain began bobbing up and down above Konoha, going back and forth as though dancing the "elevator dance."

"Uh? What's he doing?"

Tsunade had scrambled onto the rooftop closest to Deva Path Pain, her face a mix of shock, anger, and panic. She watched Pain hover in the air with his arms spread, bobbing up and down like an out-of-control robot. It was as if someone had pinned the reason in her mind to the ground and was grinding it into the dirt!

"You son of a bitch, what are you doing in front of me? We're in the middle of a war! Can't you take this seriously for once?"

Tsunade really wanted to throw her head back and yell those words, but she truly didn't dare.

Just moments ago, her furious shouting had sent Deva Path into a complete meltdown. As he floated in the air, the terrifying Chakra emanating from him had surged like an ocean. It had reminded her of her grandfather, Hashirama Senju.

She couldn't possibly have mistaken that feeling of imminent disaster. Otherwise, she wouldn't have found herself chasing Deva Path down the street like a dog for several blocks.

At the thought, Tsunade clenched her fists and glared angrily at Pain, bobbing up and down over Konoha as if performing some strange dance. If you've got the guts, come down here, you little punk. I'll beat you to death with eighty-one punches.

Meanwhile, on a mountaintop outside Konoha, the clash between the two consciousnesses inside Nagato had reached a fever pitch within the paper tree Konan had created with her jutsu. Nagato's consciousness was on the defensive. Though it filled his entire body, it was rapidly crumbling under the assault of the consciousness called "Luo Xiao-Zuo"—collapsing at the slightest touch.

"I can't forget Yahiko's pain!"

Just as Luo Xiao-Zuo's consciousness was about to drown Nagato's entire body like a black tide, Nagato's Rinnegan suddenly widened. Once more, he seemed to see Yahiko's face as he died.

The life fading from his eyes, blood at the corner of his mouth as he forced a smile at Nagato. His dim, helpless gaze, hope shattered beyond repair.

Yahiko's body was gradually growing cold against Nagato's shoulder. His breaths were barely more than a thread. "...You are the savior of this world... You should be able to..."

A savior? He didn't know.

Back then, he had fallen into despair. He'd lifted his head, opened his eyes wide, and stared up at the heavens. His Rinnegan had seen only the cold, gray sky over Amegakure and the rain that fell from it, never stopping.

Yahiko, leaning against his shoulder, had already stopped breathing.

The rain's icy chill had dripped onto his face and seeped into his heart. Mixed with the blood trickling from Yahiko's chest, it had fallen endlessly to the ground. That vivid red blood and the cold rain had congealed in his chest into a pain he could never let go.

"I! Am God!"

Nagato's Rinnegan suddenly blazed with a fearsome light. Yahiko's corpse, Deva Path, floating above Konoha, stopped "dancing" and shot skyward. A blinding white light erupted from his body, making it seem as if a second sun had risen over Konoha's once-clear sky.

"Pain in the ass!"

"Who gave you a bag of rice?"

The white light illuminated the sky. Deva Path's black silhouette raised both hands within it, like a god. A terrifying, overwhelming presence descended from above, etching deep fear and disbelief into the eyes of everyone looking up at him.

"Shinra Tensei!"

Tsunade and Luo Xiao-Zuo, one inside Konoha and the other outside it, cursed almost simultaneously. "Holy shit!"

The blinding white light had only just appeared in the sky when it descended to the ground in an instant, enveloping everything.

No one could see anything. Their vision was filled with nothing but white.

Then came a deafening roar, along with the sound of the whole earth rolling and trembling.

"Yin Seal—Release!"

In the cataclysm that shook heaven and earth, Tsunade dared take no chances. She released all the Chakra she had stored in her Yin Seal and poured it without reservation into the Katsuyu she had scattered throughout Konoha.

The Katsuyu, after receiving the Chakra, instantly grew enormous and enveloped the Konoha Ninja and villagers nearby within their bodies.

"Rumble!"

The air trembled, and the earth groaned. As Deva Path's "Super! Shinra Tensei" descended, a vast yellow-brown "wave" surged across Konoha's surface.

Driven by the tremendous shock wave, the wave spread in every direction, sweeping away everything in its path. Houses shattered, trees toppled, and dirt flew everywhere. Countless screams were drowned out by the roar.

At the heart of Konoha, beneath Deva Path's feet, an ever-widening expanse of white was exposed: a layer of rock buried an unknown number of meters beneath the village.

It was as though an invisible hand were wiping away everything above the bedrock.

Everything that belonged to Konoha was swept away with ease by that great hand. Soil, plants, buildings, streets—all were reduced to shattered remnants, driven by the shock wave like a tide in every direction. With a rumble, they surged straight out through Konoha's gates.

Viewed from above, Konoha's once-solid ground seemed to have turned into an ocean, with Shinra Tensei raising a tremendous tsunami at its center.

Everything within sight was destroyed.

Once Shinra Tensei's force had passed, the Konoha Ninja emerged trembling from the Katsuyu's bodies. The once-prosperous village had become a field of ruins.

Through the swirling dust, pairs of trembling eyes stared at the desolate scene before them, filled with utter disbelief.

Konoha, hailed as the strongest village in the Shinobi World, had just been destroyed before their eyes.

Amid the ruins, a pink-haired young woman seemed unable to bear the crushing blow. Her legs gave way, and she fell to her knees.

Tears quickly filled her eyes, then slid down her face, one by one splattering against the ground...

"Naruto—! Come back already!"

She suddenly cried out in anguish toward the sky. Then, as if answering her call,

"Boom!"

A loud crash rang out across the levelled ground of Konoha. Amid the clouds of dust billowing into the sky, enormous shadows appeared one after another.

Above those shadows stood Naruto Uzumaki, returned from his training at Mount Myoboku. He wore a dark red coat, carried a giant scroll on his back, and stood atop a gigantic summoning beast. This golden-haired gigolo with a new G had finally returned to the Hidden Leaf Village.

And that meant our protagonist's beloved junior apprentice had come to serve him his death sentence.