I'm Done Being Human!

You fell asleep, so what am I supposed to do?!

59

Chapter 59: I'm Done Being Human!!!

So, what am I supposed to do now?

Holding Ichinose, Uesugi Gen fell into deep thought.

Hadn't she said she'd wait until her mom came back before going to sleep?

How had she fallen asleep after crying for just a little while?

And another thing.

Uesugi Gen leaned over and took the handkerchief from Ichinose's pocket.

She hadn't even bothered to wipe her face. Did she think she looked pretty when she cried?

He picked up the handkerchief and gently wiped the tears from Ichinose's damp cheeks.

Was she really sleeping that soundly? Not even this would wake her?

Should he... wake her up?

Uesugi Gen looked down at Ichinose, sleeping peacefully in his arms, and his shoulders slumped.

Maybe he should just let her get some proper rest.

In the end, she was in this state because he'd pushed her too hard.

Holding Ichinose, Uesugi Gen slowly lay back against the rock behind him.

Most of the goals for this Special Exam had already been achieved today.

All that remained...

Was figuring out how to get back and sleep.

Let's review the situation.

First, Ichinose couldn't wake up.

Second, she was clinging to him, so there was no way he could break free.

Finally, he had to get back and sleep.

All right, time to solve this problem.

Like hell!

How was that even possible? Could he teleport or make a shadow clone?

Then let's try a different approach.

He wouldn't go back tonight. He'd stay here and pull an all-nighter. For someone with plenty of experience staying up late, it would be as easy as drinking water.

The problem was...

Ichinose had to wake up before the rest of the class.

Otherwise...

The whole class, Uesugi Gen, Ichinose, watching, social death, a free three-bedroom apartment... He'd better tell the Uesugi Family to develop interstellar travel ahead of schedule and immigrate to Mars...

At the thought, Uesugi Gen couldn't help shivering. Somehow, he could almost feel it.

The ghost of Shiranami Chihiro drifting over the Uninhabited Island...

Was this what they meant by a boomerang coming back around? It really was something else.

But!

Since Uesugi Gen had thought of this possibility, he certainly wasn't going to let it happen.

Other people might not know, but Uesugi Gen knew very well that the girl in his arms was the type to go to bed late and get up early.

She was bound to wake up at five thirty.

And according to the intelligence he'd gathered through his variant ability, no one in Class B would get up that early—especially after a tiring day like this.

In conclusion, Ichinose was bound to wake up before the rest of the class. Then she'd leave Uesugi Gen's arms without a hitch, and he could go back to his tent and catch up on sleep. Flawless.

Uesugi Gen smiled scornfully.

There was never any chance of something that could embarrass Uesugi Gen happening in the first place.

My plans have no blind spots!

Then Uesugi Gen took off his jacket and draped it over himself and Ichinose.

It was twelve thirty in the morning. Five hours until the target time.

Victory was within reach.

As for how to pass the time, that was easy.

First, a couple games of chess against himself in his head...

Then a couple games of international chess...

A reread of Murder on the Orient Express...

Then The Complete Sherlock Holmes...

The Boy A Bin...

The Old Man and the Sea...

One Hundred Years of Solitude...

"Yaaawn~"

Uesugi Gen let out a long yawn. It had to be about time now.

He raised his hand and checked the watch the school had issued him.

3:12.

Impossible. The watch had to be broken.

Uesugi Gen thought this with confidence.

Then he looked up at the moon's position in the sky...

Impossible. The moon had to be broken.

Oh, come on!

At home and at school, time flew by in the blink of an eye. So why, after he'd followed the murderer in the book and killed more than a dozen people, had less than two hours passed on this Uninhabited Island?

And besides...

"Yaaawn~"

Uesugi Gen rolled over and shifted into a more comfortable position, his arms around Ichinose.

I... somehow... feel like... the Sandman... cursed me...

How had I... not noticed before... that Ichinose's... body... was so soft...

Holding Ichinose... feels so good... like... I could just sink into her...

And she... smells so nice... Let me... take a sniff, just... one...

Sniff~~

Smack!

The camp fell silent once more. Only their breathing could be heard.

Uesugi Gen had been right about how it felt earlier. Sleeping beside a waterfall really was comfortable.

"Uesugi-kun, Uesugi-kun, it's time to wake up."

A voice, gentle beyond words, pulled Uesugi Gen back from paradise.

"No, let me sleep a little longer."

Uesugi Gen mumbled with his eyes closed. He even snuggled closer to Ichinose, finding an even more comfortable position.

"That's fine. Uesugi-kun can sleep as long as he wants."

The voice was still just as gentle, but now there was a hint of awkwardness in it.

"Then I'll sleep a little longer."

Uesugi Gen unhesitatingly decided to stay in bed a while longer.

"But... everyone's watching."

"Everyone's watching, so... everyone?"

"Hmm? What do you mean, everyone...?"

In an instant, countless scenes flashed through Uesugi Gen's mind: the Big Bang, the birth of stars, the emergence of life, the evolution of living creatures, the rise of humanity...

At last, his brain supplied the answer.

Night, Ichinose, Uesugi Gen, forced, asleep, stayed up all night, failed...

Whoosh! In the blink of an eye, Uesugi Gen gave Class B a demonstration of what it meant to spring into action, leaping straight up from Ichinose's lap.

But instead of shocked expressions, he was met with all kinds of indescribable looks.

Shiranami Chihiro glared at Uesugi Gen with envy, jealousy, and hatred, clenching her teeth so hard they nearly cracked.

"I knew it. You really did have your eye on Ichinose."

Kanzaki Ryuji glanced at Ichinose and sighed, then looked at Uesugi Gen and let out an even longer sigh.

"Uesugi, I understand you couldn't sleep, but don't go running over to Ichinose like a little kid asking her to put you to sleep. She was already exhausted yesterday."

Himeno Yuki stared at Uesugi Gen as if she couldn't believe he was that kind of person.

"You should really thank Ichinose. So we wouldn't wake you, she started signaling us from way off."

Uesugi Gen stared at everyone in Class B, utterly devastated. Pointing at them with a trembling finger, he stammered incoherently.

"You... I... No... That's not what happened... You have to believe me..."

"What isn't what happened?"

Everyone asked curiously.

"Nothing. Uesugi-kun was saying thank you for not coming over to wake him."

Ichinose spoke first, cutting off the explanation Uesugi Gen had been about to give.

"You... You..."

Uesugi Gen stared at Ichinose in disbelief.

What happened to you, Ichinose? This wasn't the person I knew.

Weren't you the one who taught me not to help someone without a reason?

Ichinose smiled at Uesugi Gen, answering him with her eyes.

That's what you get for lying to me!

Uesugi Gen staggered back several steps, then let out a wail and ran back to the tent.

"I'm done being human!!!"