On Looking Back, I Was Already a Withered Flower

"Alright, stop fighting, stop fighting."

Hong Ying sucked on a lollipop as he tried to calm the furious Ice-Sealed Sword Saint. Hao Renjie immediately shot him a grateful look.

"Isn't it just betraying your own side?"

"Isn't it just betraying your master and ancestors?"

"What's the big deal?"

"If you're still angry, draw your sword and cut him down. Fists alone are no fun."

The Ice-Sealed Sword Saint and Hao Renjie both glared furiously at Hong Ying, who was adding fuel to the fire.

"Traitorous disciple, get back here." The Ice-Sealed Sword Saint suppressed his anger and sent Hao Renjie away.

After all, he was his last disciple. He might be a little stupid, but he couldn't actually kill him.

"Done fighting?" Hong Ying crunched his lollipop. "Then let's talk business."

"I've read Lin Huang's file. Let me tell you, I've got a guy like him wrapped around my finger. Come on, let me explain." Hong Ying's expression turned serious. "Someone like Lin Huang, even if he reaches Saint Rank, won't escape a vulgar mindset. Especially now that he's struck it rich overnight and has plenty of resources. That's when his mindset as a nobody will be completely exposed. If I were him, what do you think I'd do?"

The Ice-Sealed Sword Saint sat up straight and looked at Hong Ying.

"Return home in glory, of course. Visit his old flames, catch up with his old classmates. Otherwise, he'd be like someone wearing fine clothes who sneaks through the night, with no chance to show off in front of people he knows. Doesn't matter if he becomes a Saint or even a god—it's no fun!"

The Ice-Sealed Sword Saint pondered for a moment. Hong Ying gazed at him eagerly. "Well? You think my analysis makes sense, right?"

"Sect Leader, we have news. The package sent to Renjie came from Sansu Prefecture."

The Ice-Sealed Sword Saint sprang to his feet, shot Hong Ying a scornful look, and waved a hand. "Notify the two Grand Elders. Lin Huang is in Sansu Prefecture. We leave at once."

"Wait for me! Hey, you have to trust my judgment. I'm never wrong." Hong Ying hurried after him, shouting.

Daqian Prefecture, South City, Hometown of the Painting Saint—and Lin Huang's hometown, too.

"I thought people who reached Saint Rank were all detached from worldly concerns. I didn't expect you to be so vulgar, too." The Spring-Autumn King looked at Lin Huang with disdain and mocked him.

"Listen, if you're going to return home in glory, you should start by changing your outfit. Didn't you seize the Zhongnan Dojo? Lay down crystal coins as your road and pave the way with divine artifacts. That's how you make an entrance."

Lin Huang glanced at the Spring-Autumn King and walked into a nearby flower shop. "You've got thirty-six hours left. Take your time thinking. If you can't figure it out, you'll die. Oh, I'd like a bouquet of white daisies. Thank you."

After taking the flowers, Lin Huang ignored the Spring-Autumn King's miserable expression and headed straight for the cemetery from his memories, his steps heavy.

"Wow. You haven't visited in ages. The grass has grown this tall. You really are an unfilial son."

"Shut up!"

Lin Huang's gaze flashed like lightning as he rebuked him sharply. The Spring-Autumn King shuddered and stopped acting like a fool, retreating to the side.

Lin Huang carefully pulled up the wild grass in front of the grave, one blade at a time, then laid out the flowers and offerings he had prepared. He knelt and bowed three times before the grave. When he rose, his expression was somewhat desolate.

"Tell me, if I went to the Netherworld, could I bring them back to life?"

Lin Huang suddenly asked.

"How could that be possible?" The Spring-Autumn King shook his head decisively. "I've read your parents' records. They died ten years ago, and their cultivation was only at the lower stage of Scholar Rank. No offense, but the Netherworld has a very high threshold. In your parents' situation, even a god couldn't do anything. Their souls have long since rotted away and dispersed. Who knows, if you took a breath, you might inhale particles from your parents' annihilated souls."

"Ow!"

Lin Huang kicked him. The Spring-Autumn King's chest caved in, and he spat out a mouthful of blood. He was shaken and didn't dare say anything else.

"The dead are gone. Resurrection is nothing but a legend. Not even gods can do it—no one can. Don't let yourself become obsessed with it."

Seeing Lin Huang's shifting expression, the Spring-Autumn King was alarmed. He feared Lin Huang would fall into the delusion of bringing his parents back to life. That would be terrifying.

Although there were legends of the dead returning to life in this world, those were fallen Divine Beings who had been resurrected. Their divinity was undying, so resurrection was still possible. Ordinary mortals could never return. Even the gods couldn't defy this law.

"I know." Lin Huang waved a hand weakly. "A child may wish to care for their parents, but by then they're gone. The Mortal World has regrets, Saints have regrets—could it be that only Divine Beings have none? Must one truly sever all ties to the Mortal World and shut out all emotions and desires to transcend and become a god?"

At Lin Huang's level of cultivation, the experience of those who came before him was no longer useful. To become a god, he had to find his own path.

For Lin Huang, every realization, every stirring of emotion, might point the way forward.

He thought for a moment, but came up with nothing, so he let it go. When he turned around, he saw a graceful woman standing in the distance with a bouquet of white daisies.

"It's her."

"Who?" The Spring-Autumn King turned to look. "Huh, isn't that your old flame? Ow!"

Lin Huang stomped him into the ground. After a moment's thought, he walked over. "Hi."

"Hi." Chen Ruo hadn't expected to run into Lin Huang, and she was a little flustered. But she quickly composed herself. "I came to visit Uncle Lin and Aunt Lin."

"You..."

"You..."

"Go ahead," Lin Huang said with a smile, his gaze gradually growing calm.

"I'm getting married. I don't know what happened to you, but I hope you'll come." Chen Ruo had seen the news about Lin Huang, too. The Law Enforcement Department had even summoned her for questioning a few times. But it seemed things had settled down now; at least the Dream Net no longer showed any reports that Lin Huang was wanted.

"Alright." Lin Huang spoke slowly, studying Chen Ruo carefully. In his mind, the sixty years of the Human Tribulation that he had never completed drifted past, bit by bit. His expression grew ever more tranquil.

Chen Ruo found it a little hard to breathe and stared at Lin Huang in confusion. Suddenly, he seemed so strange to her, and the feeling that he was no longer human rose in her heart.

Forcing down the frightening thought, Chen Ruo smiled stiffly as she placed the flowers before the grave. She smiled at the Spring-Autumn King, who lay on the ground, bleeding profusely, then walked away without looking back.

"Think she'll go snitch on us? Ow, you hit me again! I'll fight you!"

Lin Huang said nothing. He simply looked at his parents' graves and at the flowers Chen Ruo had left behind. The corners of his mouth suddenly lifted into a faint smile, then his expression gradually settled into calm, detachment, and reason. In that moment, Lin Huang severed his ties to the Mortal World.

"Looking back..."

"I'm already a withered flower. Hahaha, I get it now. You must've been especially moved because you heard she was getting married, right?" The Spring-Autumn King laughed loudly.

Lin Huang simply looked at him, so calmly that the Spring-Autumn King began to feel uneasy.

"You don't understand," Lin Huang said slowly. For the first time, he made the Spring-Autumn King understand what the dignity of a Saint was.

Saints are without emotion; they treat all things as straw dogs.

That line flashed through the Spring-Autumn King's mind.

"In the end, I was still a little short. But soon—very soon." Lin Huang smiled faintly. He knew that his state of mind was now complete. The sixty years spent together during the Human Tribulation had seemed to complete his state of mind and sever his ties to the Mortal World, but without today's visit to the cemetery, Lin Huang would have nearly fooled himself.

He could calmly accept Chen Ruo's marriage and serenely accept his parents' deaths. Only now had Lin Huang truly let go and severed his ties to the Mortal World, becoming something other than human.