Self-Detonation Therapy

The light in Kushida Kikyo's eyes dimmed, her heart gradually sinking into an abyss of darkness. She had finally found someone to confide in, finally met a friend who could understand her inner self, so why? Why would he reject her?

The pain she had suffered in the past surged back like a tide. She recalled the countless nights spent facing her inner fears alone, those scars hidden deep within her heart seemingly torn open once again. She opened her mouth, but she didn't know where to begin.

She was clearly afraid of being disappointed again, clearly afraid of the endless hurt that followed trust, yet she had finally mustered the courage. Tears welled up in her eyes; she fought to hold them back, but after a long moment, they streamed down regardless.

"Hey, Kagami, tell me, what am I supposed to do?" she sobbed.

"I thought I could keep up the act perfectly... live like a normal person, but every time the night grows deep and quiet, that sense of powerlessness swallows me whole."

Kushida's voice trembled slightly. She desperately hoped that Nagami would gently take her hand and offer her warmth. She hoped he would whisper a comfort like, "It's okay, I'm right here."

Kushida thought to herself, In the end, you still couldn't stand on my side, could you?

A wave of warmth spread across her back and throughout her entire body. She took a deep breath and looked up, puzzled.

"Kagami?"

Ignoring the gazes of those around them, Nagami pulled the petite Kushida into his arms.

"You should just go to school like a normal person; if a classmate asks for leave, they ask for leave. Isn't it nice to go to school alone? One-on-one tutoring sessions are really expensive at cram schools. I personally like sweating it out in the gym by myself, with no one to bother me."

"Is that the point!"

Kushida looked at Nagami with a look of disgust, her body twisting as she tried to break free.

On the surface, the reason was that Kushida couldn't withstand the darkness of human nature and ended up dragging the entire class down with her in a self-destruction. But fundamentally, it was the classmate who self-destructed that ignited the powder keg; the gentle, kind little angel Kushida in everyone's eyes simply couldn't bear the pressure and became a fallen angel.

If Kushida's mother wanted to wean her, she should have done it gradually; how could the babies handle being weaned all at once? At the end of the day, Kushida wasn't the classmates' real mother, and she had no obligation or responsibility to do so.

"Let me think, little Kushida definitely had some internal issues at that time."

"But none of the classmates noticed the abnormalities in little Kushida, still treating her as an emotional trash can."

"Ultimately, the most selfish ones were the classmates who committed the evil deeds. Even if it went to court, little Kushida wouldn't be in the wrong; she was diligently keeping the secret from start to finish. Little Kushida is a truly hardworking girl."

Without a doubt, neither the self-destruction nor the evil deeds were Kushida's doing; it had nothing to do with her.

At this moment, the recognized Kushida felt the tightly shut door of her heart being pushed open a crack, and a beam of light shone in.

That's right, I wasn't wrong from the very beginning. I've always thought so, and today, I was finally understood.

Kushida's hand tightened involuntarily. Perhaps she really could slowly walk out of this dark abyss.

(Taking the initiative to expose this matter has nothing to do with little Kushida; if you want to blame someone, blame the classmate who insisted on dragging the whole class down with them.)

The surrounding gazes were a bit stinging, filled with envy, jealousy, and hatred. From time to time, she could hear curses directed at the "normies."

Things like, "All normies should just explode!"

"Little Kushida, let go. There are a lot of people here on the track field."

"Why didn't you think of that when you were hugging me?"

Kushida looked at Nagami with a resentful gaze, a plan for revenge forming in her mind.

"What the hell, ouch! What are you doing? Ow."

Kushida bit down hard on Nagami's chest with her teeth; teeth marks and saliva stains were clearly visible on his shirt.

"That's my reward for you. If you take advantage of me again, it won't be as simple as just a bite."

"Ah, sorry, sorry."

Nagami apologized awkwardly.

"Are you still going to the student council? It seems like quite a bit of time has passed."

"Ah! Is it that late already? I'm doomed. Bye, little Kushida."

Kushida waved goodbye. Watching Nagami's figure grow smaller, she felt a strange sensation in her heart, which couldn't help but remind her of the scene when her parents dropped her off at school on her first day of elementary school.

She stood there for who knows how long, staring at the direction Nagami had disappeared for a long time without moving. The images in her memory became increasingly clear; back then, she had gripped her backpack straps tightly, her eyes fixed firmly on the backs of her parents as they walked away. The little girl she was had been filled with fear, surrounded by unfamiliar faces, as if she were standing in a cold, desolate wilderness.

"Is this familial love?"

She took a deep breath, trying to dispel this sense of helplessness. But that loneliness clung to her like a shadow.

Just then, a stray cat ran over, sniffing around her feet. Kushida crouched down and gently stroked the kitten's head; the cat's warm body and affectionate movements made her heart feel a little warmer.

"Kagami, you really are a heinous sinner."

Her socialite instincts seemed to warn her that emotions only make people blind and hurt, that she had long since lost faith in human nature and had long ago made up her mind.

But isn't that what love is? It's unpredictable; it arrives quietly like the wind, yet it is difficult to grasp.

Perhaps on some ordinary day, when your eyes meet a stranger's on the bus, your heartbeat begins to lose its rhythm. That feeling is like the warm spring sun shining into your heart—startling, yet impossible to resist.

Perhaps growing up is just a constant experience of these partings and loneliness. Just like having the kitten for company now, there will always be people or things that appear in your life to offer comfort.

Kushida stood up, brushed the dust off her clothes, and a look of determination appeared on her face. The sense of helplessness that had once plagued her was gradually being left behind.

Kushida had completely forgotten that her initial purpose was to test whether Horikita knew the inside story of middle school; now, there was something much more important in her heart.

Nagami seemed to have forgotten the purpose of coming to the track field today; unable to recall it for a moment, he pushed it to the back of his mind.

After such a public display of affection, the number of love letters Nagami received in the future would likely decrease significantly. Given Kushida's popularity, the news would surely spread throughout the entire grade soon.

Sigh, what a pain.

"Nagami, you're late. I haven't retired yet, and you're already looking down on me?"

"My apologies, President. I ran into something on the way and got held up."

"That's rare, President. There must be a reason for Kagami being late."

Ichinose chimed in to help.

Arigato, Honami.

"Enough small talk, let's get to work."

"Honami, how is your class's exam question preparation coming along? Can you give me a hint?"

"We just started. Let's talk about it after we finish up, Kagami."

Yosh, time to start the under-the-table labor.