If the Sheath Alone Can't Kill You, Then I'll Try Another Way

Shampoo...

Conditioner...

Dish soap...

Insecticide...?

"Wait, not that one."

Horikita Suzune frowned slightly and stopped the cashier from scanning it.

Without realizing it, she had picked up something strange.

Those annoying insects must have left too strong an impression on her, especially that detestable mosquito.

Horikita took the stray insecticide out of her basket and stared at it silently for several seconds.

Come to think of it, did schools in Tokyo need this sort of thing too? Could the dormitory conditions actually be less than ideal?

At a school like this, there should have been no need to worry about whether the environment met students' living needs.

Though she had tentatively made her judgment, it still felt as though one unpleasant thing after another had happened on the very first day of school. She could only hope her life from now on would not give her too much to worry about...

While thinking, she carefully checked the items the clerk was packing once more. They were basically all the cheapest items she had selected, along with things she had picked up for free. Once she was sure there were no mistakes, Horikita took out her phone and scanned to pay.

"Your total is 3,000 yen."

The clerk gave her the price.

"Thank you."

"You can leave any unwanted products at the counter, and we'll return them to the shelves afterward."

"Mm." Horikita responded softly.

With the shopping bag full of her purchases in hand, she turned and caught sight of the household goods section she had come from. Two somewhat familiar faces were picking through the items there.

What a nest of vermin. As expected, useless people chose to huddle together to hide their weaknesses.

Horikita shot them a hostile look, wanting to assassinate one of them like a concealed weapon, then capture and imprison the other for a proper attempt at persuasion.

After all, every grievance had its source. To catch thieves, catch the ringleader first.

Ayanokoji Kiyotaka clearly had the sort of personality that endured whatever came his way. He was easily swept along by the atmosphere. If she eliminated the mobile pathogen beside him first, the disease would surely be cured!

The girl stared for a while, only to find that they did not seem to notice her existence. Her sharp hidden weapon struck fluffy, soft cotton, causing her to expend military resources while wearing down her fighting spirit.

She eventually withdrew her gaze. After thinking it over, she decided to let it go for now.

Carrying her shopping bag, she prepared to return first and lie low while arranging her strategic stronghold.

Perhaps victory or defeat would not be decided today. She had a feeling this would be a prolonged battle...

"Ayanokoji, what are you planning to buy?"

"Well... some daily necessities."

Ayanokoji Kiyotaka casually let his gaze wander about. He looked utterly indecisive, as though he had no opinions of his own.

"What about you, President?"

"Of course, I buy whatever I want."

"That answer gives me no reference at all."

"Not so."

Bai Yu lowered his head and swept his gaze across a shelf in the middle. He casually raised one finger and waved it at his side. "Unlike you, I know quite clearly what I want."

Ayanokoji Kiyotaka glanced lightly at the shopping basket in the other man's hand.

"Aren't the things you picked for the exact same purposes as mine...?"

Bai Yu looked up at that, smiling confidently. "You're wrong, Ayanokoji. Even when choosing the most basic daily necessities, there are things to consider!"

"Such... as?" Ayanokoji Kiyotaka did not sound convinced.

"For example, this Gentle brand herbal shampoo in your hand."

Bai Yu pointed at it confidently, assuming the air of a walking encyclopedia of daily life. "The ingredients in this one benefit people with fine, soft, smooth hair, and it nourishes and repairs it. But it isn't very friendly to people like me, whose hair is thicker and more prone to curling. Use it too much, and you risk going bald in the prime of your life."

"..."

Ayanokoji Kiyotaka silently held the shampoo up to study it.

Bai Yu, meanwhile, continued imparting his excellent life experience with great satisfaction. "Take this body wash in my hand, for instance. Its ingredients are scientifically and reasonably balanced, so it won't abrade your skin or harm your body. Applied to the skin, it feels as soft and silky as some kind of special massage oil..."

"When showering, just apply a layer over yourself. There's no need to scrub too hard. When the entire shower routine is nearly over, turn the showerhead to maximum power and rinse the body tightly wrapped and covered by the body wash. You'll get an exquisite experience that words can hardly describe. It feels absolutely incredible!"

As Ayanokoji looked over the description of another body wash in his hand, he hesitated over whether to ask if it felt as good as doing that.

By then, Bai Yu's emotional exclamation had reached its peak, and the words burst out of his mouth. "It's ten thousand times better than xx!"

"..."

For a moment, a wave of extremely subtle looks fell upon them.

As Bai Yu collected himself and looked up, he found Ayanokoji Kiyotaka standing a full ten steps away from him.

"President." Ayanokoji Kiyotaka waited thoughtfully until the surrounding crowd had scattered before trying to speak. "I have a rather immature observation."

"Oh?"

Bai Yu smiled and indicated that he was all ears, as though the atmosphere that had just made everyone want to find a hole to crawl into had not affected him in the slightest.

"That is... it seems that as long as the price is a little higher, every body wash and shampoo has the effects you described." Ayanokoji Kiyotaka casually picked up a bottle of premium shampoo from the shelf and pointed it out in an even tone. "I buy the cheap ones, so their effects have some shortcomings. The ones in your hand are among the most expensive, so their functions are more comprehensive... I just looked at a few in the same price range as yours, and the listed effects were all pretty much the same..."

Bai Yu froze.

"You mean these shampoos don't actually have any special tricks or distinctive traits at all? As long as they're in the same price bracket, all their effects are more or less the same!?"

Ayanokoji nodded coldly.

Bai Yu was stunned.

"No! Are you saying all the experience I've summed up over so many years has been completely useless?"

"Not entirely. At least you know roughly what ingredients shampoos on the market contain." Ayanokoji Kiyotaka offered a measured consolation.

Bai Yu felt deeply defeated. His entire person deflated at once as he turned to face the wall. "Ayanokoji, I want to go home."

"President..."

"Don't comfort me. I'm an idiot. I deserve this."

"I meant to say... remember to pay before going home."

Bai Yu wanted to rub his scalp against the mall wall, but after thinking about it, decided against it.

He had to cherish his hair.

He recovered a little of his energy, raised the shopping basket in his hand, and turned to Ayanokoji Kiyotaka. "Let's go, Ayanokoji. Before paying, I want to fill this thing up first."

As Ayanokoji Kiyotaka followed the man's carefree figure, he offered a word of advice. "President, it would be better to exercise a little restraint when spending money."

Bai Yu said, "Good steel should be used on the blade's edge!"

Ayanokoji Kiyotaka muttered gloomily, "...Good that you know."

"But my sword never leaves its sheath!"

"Are you some reclusive master who can kill people using only a sword sheath...?"

Ayanokoji Kiyotaka was forced to make the jab.

If shampoo were drinkable, he really wanted to take a sip to quench his thirst right now. It would not be strange at all if he died of dehydration from talking too much while staying around the President.

"Only a sword sheath can kill most people, but it probably can't kill Ayanokoji!"

"Are you saying you'd go easy on me? That's a huge help."

"Hahahahaha, you're so funny..."

The crazy man boldly strode into the bookstore inside the mall again. It looked like things might be quiet for a while now?

Ayanokoji Kiyotaka silently guessed.