实教,桂木桂马的恋爱头脑战
Author: Ye Yi Cheng Zhou
Synopsis:
Young Keima Katsuragi was holding a game console, posting攻略 for various dating sims on different forums.
Just then, Keima Katsuragi received a new message.
[To the God of Conquest]
[I heard the rumor that you can win over any kind of girl. I find it hard to believe, but if it's true, plenty of girls are waiting for you to conquer them (this will be the highest-difficulty dating sim you've ever experienced).]
"What? This provocative email—who does he think I am? A god doesn't run away!"
Keima Katsuragi pressed the confirmation button.
Welcome to Classroom of the Elite!
Volume One: Chapter One: The World's Ending? The God of Conquest Is Called to the Rescue
"An associate in a certain port has disappeared!"
"Put the European runaway spirits' flow chart on the screen!"
"The situation's even more dire!"
In the Far East Branch of the Ministry of Hades' Legal Affairs, Skull, the chief of the Undead Countermeasures Office, was at her wit's end over the grim situation.
Just then, the surroundings suddenly changed. Skull, who had been in the countermeasures office moments ago, found herself in a completely unfamiliar space.
It was a pure white space, where all sense of up, down, left, and right had blurred. Even in Hell, she had never seen a place like this.
"Welcome to my space."
At that moment, an unfamiliar voice sounded in Skull's ear.
Countless photons appeared before her and gathered together, taking the shape of a girl who stood before Skull.
"Who are you?"
"I have many names. Different dimensions, worlds, and cultures call me or my avatars by different names: Chaos, Matres, Jehovah. In other words, I am the creator god who governs the multiverse, the one true God. My stature is beyond comparison with the goddesses of Heaven in your world."
As the deity spoke, images of countless parallel worlds appeared before Skull's eyes, including the world she came from.
Skull nodded thoughtfully. After all, the power her visitor had displayed was completely beyond her comprehension.
"You're overwhelmed by the runaway spirits, but the multiverse is now facing a far greater crisis. Not only your world, but countless parallel worlds may be invaded by the Void. If the invasion succeeds, the worlds will be finished."
As the deity spoke, information about the multiverse poured into Skull's mind, quickly helping her understand the situation.
This crisis was far worse than the runaway spirits!
"As the creator god, I can easily drive back the Void—"
"Whew, that's a relief."
Skull let out a long breath.
"—but I've lost much of my energy, so I can't do that for now!"
"!!!!!"
Skull's little skeletal body nearly leapt into the air.
Wait, what?
Are you kidding me?
This is a major crisis that could destroy the world!
"But there's good news. I know where my energy is. It was scattered across a certain world and merged with some people there. Of course, mortal bodies can't use my power, and they won't even feel it. But I need your help to recover it. Once I get it back, I can regain my strength as soon as possible and fight the Void!"
"I see. But how do I do that?"
"Make the people who carry the power fragments fall in love. Once they develop feelings for someone, the fragments inside them will return to me."
"Huh?"
Skull was at a loss for a moment.
That sounded strangely familiar.
"You've been doing similar work all along, haven't you? I'll grant you the ability to connect with that world. After that, you'll do what you've always done: find suitable targets and figure out how to recover my power fragments."
"Mm..."
Skull's voice grew subdued.
So in the end, she was just changing workplaces!
Because of this wretched job, she didn't even have time to get married!
Was she born to be a corporate drone?
"Looks like you're not too happy about this job."
The deity narrowed her eyes slightly as she looked at Skull.
"N-no, I am!"
Skull hurriedly forced a smile onto her skull.
Could the creator god read minds, too?
"That's right. I can read minds."
"I'm sorry."
"Your feelings are only natural. But as I just said, this is a major crisis affecting the multiverse. If the Void invades, not only you, but countless parallel worlds will be destroyed. Of course, if you successfully complete your mission, I'll reward you. For example, I could permanently solve the runaway spirit problem in your world and give you a life where you never have to work overtime and never have to worry about food or clothing—"
"Leave it to me!"
Skull pounded her chest with all her might, making her bones clatter. Her face was full of determination, and light even seemed to shine from the hollows of her skull.
"These are the locations of my power fragments."
As she spoke, a stack of cards appeared in Skull's hands. Each one showed the portrait of an unfamiliar girl.
"You look so confident. What are you planning to do?"
"I'll fill the cracks in the girls' hearts. Romance is the best way to do that! I already have someone suitable in mind!"
Skull smiled and shouted in her shrill, offbeat voice,
"His name is the God of Conquest!"
Meanwhile, on the rooftop of Maijima Academy's high school, a boy named Keima Katsuragi was holding a game console and posting攻略 for various dating sims on different forums.
He had conquered his ten-thousandth heroine, played nearly five thousand games, and could play through six games at once—his record was twelve. He was the god of dating sims.
The god of the gaming world!
Just then, Keima Katsuragi received a new message.
[To the God of Conquest]
[I heard the rumor that you can win over any kind of girl. I find it hard to believe, but if it's true, plenty of girls are waiting for you to conquer them (this will be the highest-difficulty dating sim you've ever experienced).]
"What? This provocative email—who does he think I am? A god doesn't run away!"
Keima Katsuragi pressed the confirmation button.
At the same time, a blinding pink light burst across the sky.
A black-haired girl descended from above.
"Thank you for accepting the contract, God of Conquest."
Keima Katsuragi had been knocked away by the shock wave and rolled across the ground several times. Only then did he push up his glasses and carefully look at the girl before him.
She looked about his age. A purple skirt hugged her slender body, a pink feather haori fluttered around her, and white thigh-high socks accentuated her straight legs. Beneath her silky hair was a lovely, pale face, and her gemstone-like eyes brimmed with impatience.
"Then let's hurry and go!"
The girl took Keima Katsuragi's hand and flew straight into the air.
Volume One: Chapter Two: Is Real Life Really a Dating Sim?
Several hours later.
Inside a moving bus, Keima Katsuragi sat silently in one of the seats, playing on his handheld console.
"God of Conquest! I'll leave the rest to you!"
Sitting beside him was the black-haired girl who had appeared yesterday. She had changed into a brand-new red school uniform, the same style as Keima Katsuragi's.
"Hey, keep your voice down! We're supposed to act like siblings when we're out, Elsie."
Keima Katsuragi sighed helplessly and spoke in a low voice. The hand holding his console seemed to tremble.
He hadn't expected the email he'd received to be a contract from a demon.
And he hadn't expected that the girl who'd appeared beside him, calling herself Elsie, was a demon civil servant.
He'd somehow been forced to accept the absurd mission of "dating various girls to save the multiverse," and then Elsie had brought him to another parallel world. If he failed the mission, he wouldn't be able to return to his original world, regardless of whether that world still existed—
Damn it, I've never even held a girl's hand in real life!
All I need in my world are the girls in games!
"Guess this world is doomed..."
At the thought, Keima Katsuragi sighed in despair.
In the game world, he was the omnipotent God of Conquest.
But the real world was completely different!
"God of Conquest, if you're so good at winning girls over, maybe real-life girls will be just like the heroines in games—"
"Don't confuse games with reality. I can't win over girls in a lukewarm world like this."
Keima Katsuragi's expression and tone were utterly serious.
"Now that you understand, hurry up and send me back."
"I-I can't do that either. It was the Skeleton Chief who brought us here, using a special item. It can only be used once. I don't know how the Skeleton Chief managed it, but this isn't your original world, either. It's just a highly similar parallel world! There are bound to be differences from your original world. For you, it's not the real world, either..."
The moment Elsie finished speaking, Keima Katsuragi suddenly realized something, and his expression turned serious.
Wait!
That's right! This is another parallel world!
Doesn't that mean this world has lots of games that don't exist in my world?
That's right, that's right, that's right!
Why didn't I think of that earlier?
At the thought, Keima Katsuragi, who had been despairing moments ago, was suddenly full of energy.
"All right, then I'll stay in this world a little longer!"
According to what Elsie had said, he only had to act like an ordinary high school student in this world.
"Just as expected of the God of Conquest! You've bounced back so quickly! Also, here's a tool to help you with your work!"
As she spoke, Elsie pulled out a deck of cards from who knew where.
"The cards show all the targets in this world! Ordinary people can't see them!"
Keima Katsuragi took the cards and couldn't help feeling embarrassed—
Wasn't this an awful lot of them?
Before you continue