The Mad Savior

"Mom! Harry's gone crazy!"

Number Four, Privet Drive kicked off with Dudley's piercing scream.

Under the thin morning sunlight, Harry sweated profusely, wearing a perfect smile as he slowly advanced with the hum of the lawnmower.

For a moment, his smile twisted.

[Ding ding ding! Please note: In non-combat states, in the presence of sapient life forms, the Savior should always wear an affable smile]

"Ding your mother's head!"

Harry finally lost it.

[Ding ding ding! Violation of core precept. Please note: The Savior should be Elegant and Gentle; profanity is only permitted against hostile units. First-tier reward granted: Basic Electrotherapy · Ten Minutes]

"Aaaaah!"

In frozen time, amidst dazzling green lightning, Harry's body trembled as he screamed in agony.

He smelled burning, along with an itch that burrowed into his bones.

[Dark Magic Resistance +0.01]

"Dark magic—this is definitely the Cruciatus Curse, isn't it!"

[Punishment period; penalties do not accumulate]

With the voice, Harry's collapsed body automatically righted itself. Once the charred traces vanished, the perfect smile bloomed again, and time resumed flowing.

—Sure enough, it was punishment. 'Reward' my ass~

He looked up at the still-misty sky, as if seeing his own bleak future.

If he could do it over, he would definitely uninstall this goddamn [Savior Training Manual], this cursed portable DingTalk, and fling it into outer space!

It all... started two hours ago.

He was a standard lying-flat enthusiast.

Proud of not working overtime, ashamed of staying up late, coasting through life was his motto, hard work he despised, exercise was anathema, and hotpot, milk tea, cola... were his friends.

Since childhood, he'd never been sick, never gained weight no matter what he ate, and right after graduation, he'd lucked into an ordinary nine-to-five job with weekends off. The company was close to home—just a hundred meters' walk.

If nothing unexpected happened, his whole life would pass like that.

[Ding ding ding!]

The nemesis of his perfect life had arrived!

On the street, it fell from high altitude, hitting him square on the forehead.

When he woke up again, he was in a dark cupboard, lying on a lumpy wooden bed, with spiders overhead and glasses wrapped in tape on the shabby bedside table.

[Ding ding ding! [Savior Training Manual] at your service. Congratulations, Savior, on awakening your memories. Uninstall? █ or NO]

The only clear thing in his blurry, nearsighted vision—a corner of a white book still stained with blood—projected a blue light screen.

—Wait, you murderous book, where did my YES go?

[Congratulations, Savior, for choosing to agree. Automatic scanning and data entry complete. Adapting to the surrounding environment.]

—When did I agree! You black-hearted white book!

The white book's cover automatically displayed a one-inch photo of Harry.

Below it read:

[Name: Harry James Potter]

[Age: 7]

[Address: Number Four, Privet Drive, Little Whinging, Surrey—Cupboard Under the Stairs]

[Talents: Parseltongue · Gold, Dark Magic · Gold, White Magic · Gold, Potions · Silver, Charms · Silver, Transfiguration · Silver, Divination · Copper]

[Titles: The Boy Who Lived · Gold (Luck constant +1, Luck +7 in crisis), Core · Junior Savior lv1 · Iron (All resistances +1)]

[Precepts: None]

[Skills: Eating, Sleeping, Running... (Iron), Unstable Teleportation (Copper), Unstable Shrinking Spell (Copper), Constant Bedhead Charm (Silver)]

[Quests: None]

—Isn't this a takeoff!

[Great Saviors all possess noble moral character. Please set your precepts. If not set, they will be randomly drawn. Countdown: 10, 9...]

—No swearing!

[Iron-tier precept does not meet Savior requirements. Automatically upgraded to [Elegant and Gentle · Copper]. In non-combat states, in the presence of sapient life forms, maintain a smile and watch your words.]

—Upgrade your mother's fucking ass!

[The Savior has displayed superb wisdom. Cursing without using your mouth. Experience +1]

Harry barely cracked a smile.

[Quest slot detected as vacant. Auto-issuing quest [Training]. Please designate a training plan as soon as possible.]

—Supreme wisdom, huh.

—Eat, sleep, slack off, watch TV.

[The path of salvation tolerates no idleness. A basic training plan (monthly) has been automatically generated for you.]

—I cnmlgb!

[Savior... Experience +1]

[Current period task: Clean...]

[Saving the world starts with your surroundings. Please maintain a clean living environment. Phase 1: Clear cobwebs within 10 minutes.]

—Ridiculous. Do you think I'm someone you can order around?

[Ding ding ding. Attention. The path of salvation tolerates no idleness. Do you insist on receiving a Level 1 reward: Basic Electrotherapy Minutes?]

After a long, unexplained bout of crackling, Harry, feeling like he was about to shake himself into Parkinson's, hurriedly looked at the training plan. The white book flipped its pages automatically. August 1st, 1987, 5:01:59.

The time on it hadn't even passed a single second since he received the punishment.

[Does the Savior still require the reward? After accumulating three refusals, you may reject a single task... Completely rejecting the [Basic Training Plan (Monthly)] requires 1008 electric shock rewards. Claim all at once?]

—30 points of Dark Magic resistance?

—Even if I don't die, I'll go crazy, right?

"No more," Harry said dryly, punching a spider dead with one fist.

"No more. We won't make you do chores anymore."

Inside the Dursley residence, the head of the household, Vernon Dursley, let out a trembling voice.

He, along with his wife Petunia Dursley and son Dudley Dursley, cowered in a corner, not daring to come close, shakily watching Harry, who was tirelessly mopping the floor.

The only thing Harry was happy about right now was that he had just given the Dursleys a beating.

Ten minutes ago.

[Weeding task complete. [Weeding] Proficiency +1]

[You may flip through the [Savior Training Manual] to view improvement suggestions.]

Harry, who had just put down the lawnmower and was heading back, mentally voiced—Flip nmlgb, view improvement suggestions.

[...Experience +1]

[How can the great Savior rely on external tools? Pulling weeds directly by hand will grant more proficiency.]

—Use nmlgb.

[Great Savior, your wisdom of insults has overflowed, reaching today's limit. This method will no longer yield experience points.]

Harry, who had already picked up the mop and was about to start the next task—You brain-dead book, you're even stealing my experience points, huh!

[Please display your wisdom of insults again tomorrow, great Savior.]

"Boy, you..." Red-faced Vernon Dursley had wanted to scold Harry for daring to play the victim outside, but seeing Harry lift the wet mop, ready to start mopping, he swallowed his words.

"Boy, I know yesterday was your birthday. Seeing how sensible you are," he opened his wallet, fished through it, and pulled out 10 pence, but after a moment's thought, swapped it for a 1-pound coin. "Here, take it."

The golden coin arced along a parabola and landed in front of Harry.

"Daddy," Dudley, who looked like a piglet in a blond wig, widened his round eyes. "Why does he get a gift!" He counted on his fingers, swallowing his saliva. "That could buy... six chocolate bars!"

"You gave Harry a gift?" Petunia, still wearing her hair curlers, froze in place.

Harry was her own nephew, but out of jealousy toward her sister and Harry's magical abilities, along with the foolish notion that cold-shouldering him would drive away his magic, she had always ignored this fact.

"Pick it up. Pick up your gift right now!" Vernon noticed Harry was still mopping, and his anger ignited.

Seeing no reaction even after his scolding, he felt his dignity as the head of the household had been insulted.

"Stop right there!" He reached out, trying to grab Harry.

[Ding ding ding! Hostile intelligent unit task commission detected...]

A corner of the white book, stained with blood, reappeared. Everything around them froze.

Out of the corner of his eye, Harry could see Uncle Vernon's comically protruding tongue, Aunt Petunia's hand reaching out only to pull back, and the ugly grin blooming on Dudley's piggy face...

[Judged as task obstruction. Counterattack authorized...]

[Vernon Dursley. Black Iron-tier hostile intelligent life unit.]

[Granting the great Savior [Gandalf Combat Art]...]

The white book vanished.

Time flowed again.

Harry felt a surge of heat from some unknown source rushing through his limbs and bones. Uncle Vernon's movements became slow. His body automatically swung the mop in front of him and took a step back.

"Ouch, you little—"

"How dare you hit my dad! You—ouch!"

"Vernon! Harry, you—ouch!"

[Task obstruction removed. Please continue the mission, Savior.]

Harry still wore a perfectly proper smile as he turned the wet mop around and continued mopping the floor.

The Dursleys exchanged glances. Now they all understood one thing: Harry had definitely gone mad.

Vernon crept upstairs and dialed the phone. "Hello, hospital? My nephew has gone mad!"