Your Grandpa Is Still Your Grandpa

"Hawthorn! Handmade hawthorn sticks! If they don't taste good, you don't pay!"

"Suitable for young and old, no cheating children or elders!"

Across from Jian Shan's pill stall, Chen Xian had been shouting himself hoarse for a full quarter-hour.

Unfortunately, the effect was minimal. Not a single stick had sold.

"Is the price too high?" Chen Xian watched the endless stream of people, mulling over his pricing problem.

But that couldn't be right. That shady brat across the way had already sold two bottles of Qi Induction Pills!

Sure, both bottles went at half price, but that was still eight hundred Contribution Points—a fivefold profit!

So it definitely wasn't a price issue.

Just as Chen Xian was racking his brains over how to make his first sale, a man with sunken eye sockets and hollow cheeks walked past with a noblewoman who looked a good hundred and sixty jin.

Seeing his pallid complexion and depleted kidney essence, Chen Xian's eyes lit up.

He understood!

It was about demand. Only by understanding and satisfying a customer's needs could he sell his product better.

So he changed his sales pitch.

"Xuanyun Sword Sect's Grand-Uncle Master's brand medicinal cuisine—Blood Sugar Hawthorn is now on sale!"

"One stick whets the appetite, strengthens the body, firms the kidneys, and boosts virility. Five sticks assist cultivation and nourish the meridians! Limited supply, grab them before they're gone!"

Sure enough, as soon as the slogan changed, a crowd gathered around.

After all, anything from the Xuanyun Sect was guaranteed quality, especially since this old man claimed to be the Grand-Uncle Master of the Xuanyun Sword Sect.

As for credibility, since the surrounding Xuanyun disciples didn't call him out, passing rogue cultivators and outsiders were ninety percent convinced.

But this thing didn't look like medicinal cuisine at all.

A single glance at the ingredients showed they were just ordinary mountain fruits.

If it was only a common snack, they could buy it down the mountain.

Those who came up the mountain were mostly rogue cultivators and mortals seeking cultivation—they only wanted things that helped with training.

So while many gathered to look, few actually wanted to buy.

And those with a little spare cash who wanted to try? They turned and left as soon as they asked the price.

Ten Dao Silver for one stick!

At that price, you could buy a Qi Induction Pill.

Even if he was the Xuanyun Sword Sect's Grand-Uncle Master, he couldn't rip people off like this!

"Duan Cui, do you think the Grand-Uncle Master will sell any today?" Jian Shan packed up his stall as the sky darkened, chatting with his companion.

"I doubt it. If the Grand-Uncle Master sold them for one Contribution Point each, he might move a few on reputation alone."

Duan Cui stuffed hammers into his Mustard Seed Bag, his tone unoptimistic.

"Forget it. He's still the Grand-Uncle Master. We'll pack up and go show some support later."

Jian Shan thought for a moment, then weighed the heavy Dao Silver in his hand.

On the other side, Chen Xian was getting anxious.

He'd even pulled out the Sword Sect Grand-Uncle Master title—why were these people still just looking and not buying?

Just then, the man who looked drained by the noblewoman walked back from the opposite direction.

Chen Xian's mind raced, and he quickly shouted: "Grand-Uncle Master's brand hawthorn sticks! Replenish qi and blood, firm the kidneys and strengthen essence! Grab them while they last!"

Sure enough, the drained man's ears twitched slightly at "firm the kidneys and strengthen essence."

He immediately turned with the noblewoman and pushed through the crowd.

"Does this hawthorn of yours really have... uh, the effects you mentioned?"

The Kidney-Deficient Man eyed the hawthorn sticks on the straw bundle, asking the question he cared about most.

He'd come up the mountain this time specifically to find pills or food that could replenish qi, blood, and nourish the kidneys.

Unfortunately, the Xuanyun Sword Sect disciples only sold proper pills. He'd asked around and found no Kidney-Replenishing Pills.

Now that he'd finally run into something, he had to try.

Otherwise, that insatiable fat cow would drain him dry sooner or later.

Chen Xian stared at his panda-like dark circles, stroked his beard, and smiled: "Naturally. Everything this old man says is true!"

"This hawthorn was made using the Inner Sect's exclusive Medicinal Cuisine Divine Pot, refining blood medicine for forty-nine days, then coated on carefully selected large fruits."

He explained at length, adding story value to the hawthorn sticks in his hand.

The Kidney-Deficient Man listened impatiently: "Enough talk. Give me one to try first. How much?"

"Ten Dao Silver per stick. Buy five, get one free!"

As soon as Chen Xian finished, the Kidney-Deficient Man pursed his lips at the noblewoman beside him: "Give him ten."

"Oh, of course~ Feng Bao~"

Fat Lady cooed obediently, her voice syrupy sweet and utterly mismatched with her figure.

Chen Xian and everyone around instantly broke out in goosebumps.

He quickly plucked a plump, generously loaded stick of candied hawthorns from the straw bundle and handed it to Kidney-Deficient Man.

Kidney-Deficient Man took the candied hawthorns with trembling hands and, under the curious gazes of the crowd, began eating them on the spot.

One down—no reaction.

Two down—he suddenly let out an "Huh?"

Three and four crammed into his mouth together and swallowed whole, he exhaled a puff of hot air: "Incredible! I feel a surge of heat flowing through my whole body, it's wonderful!"

The crowd marveled as his deathly pale face miraculously regained a hint of color.

"Four more sticks!" he said, his face bright with surprise, holding up four fingers toward Chen Xian.

"Pay up."

"Of course, Feng Bao~~" The wealthy lady pulled out another forty taels of silver and handed it to Chen Xian.

"Buy five, get one free!"

Chen Xian quickly yanked five more candied hawthorn sticks from the straw bundle and shoved them into Kidney-Deficient Man's hands.

Kidney-Deficient Man ate them on the spot again.

Crunch! Crunch! Crunch! The only sound left was the crisp shattering of the sugar coating, making quite a few people's mouths water and their interest stir.

Forget the effects—it just looked delicious, this stuff!

After six sticks of candied hawthorns went down, Kidney-Deficient Man's condition visibly improved.

His hands stopped shaking, his face grew ruddy, and even his dark circles faded rapidly. Aside from his cheeks still being a bit sunken, he was almost indistinguishable from a healthy person.

"Burp~" He let out a sour belch, feeling utterly refreshed.

He looked at the wealthy lady: "Pang Bao, when I get back, I'll let you taste the new moves I've been learning. I feel like I could go another thirty rounds!"

"That's wonderful, Feng Bao! Boohoo, you're finally better—I thought I'd drained you dry!"

The wealthy lady wept tears of joy, feeling a happy sex life waving at her from ahead.

She looked at Chen Xian with gratitude: "Old senior, what's the difference between these candied hawthorns with different fruits?"

Chen Xian shook his head: "No difference, just the flavor."

The wealthy lady nodded, then waved her plump hand and handed over three hundred-tael silver notes: "Then give me a bit of every flavor—pack me thirty sticks!"

"Jackpot!" Chen Xian rejoiced, took the notes, counted out the candied hawthorns, packed them into paper bags, and handed them over.

"Buy five, get one free—that's thirty-six sticks total, ma'am, take care!"

"Come back when you're done!"

The wealthy lady left satisfied, her Feng Bao in tow.

Watching the two depart, the surrounding crowd only then caught on.

Someone slapped their thigh: "Aiyo! That's miraculous!"

"The effect is instant! And it's medicinal food, not a pill—no side effects!"

"If it's from the Grand-Uncle Master, it's truly top-notch!"

"Ten taels of silver is a bit steep, but I'm not short on cash! I'll take five sticks too!"

The crowd, which had been hesitating moments before, now erupted into a frenzy, mostly wealthy commoners. Cultivators still looked down on such effects.

Within minutes, Chen Xian's straw bundle was completely bare.

If he hadn't set aside a few sticks to give away, they'd have snatched every last one.

"Old senior, is that all?" Those who missed out were unwilling, staring at the few sticks wrapped in Chen Xian's arms.

"All gone, all gone! Come back next time! These few aren't for sale."

Chen Xian quickly waved them off, looked up at the sky that had fully darkened, and figured it was time to go.

"Today's a good day~ everything I wish for comes true~"

He stuffed the thick stack of silver notes into his pocket and strolled leisurely toward the place to exchange for Contribution Points.

He didn't know that not far behind him, Jian Shan and Duan Cui stood dumbfounded, staring at the ground littered with bamboo sticks.

What had they just witnessed?

The Grand-Uncle Master had sold all his candied hawthorns!

That pouch of silver notes—damn, he'd made a killing!

The two exchanged glances and said in unison: "The old hand is still the old hand."