Gangzi's Smuggling Trip to the Lower Realm

The teleportation beam rose.

Feng Yan's figure disappeared from where he stood.

The Divine Official wiped the sweat from his forehead, a smug smile curling his lips.

So a First-Level Main God was nothing special after all. He hadn't even noticed this.

At last, Lord Sea God's mission was complete.

Just then...

A sharp whoosh came from behind him.

The Divine Official whipped around.

A Purple-Haired Divine Pig was charging straight at him at 91.78 meters per second.

With a boom!

The Purple-Haired Divine Pig slammed straight into the Divine Official's face.

The Divine Official crumpled to the ground.

"Who's there!"

"How dare you ambush this Divine Official!"

Yu Xiaogang strode out slowly, his voice low. "For Dong'er, I'll give it everything I've got!"

"You're... Sea God's teacher... Fart God!"

The Divine Official blanched, clearly recognizing Yu Xiaogang.

"Are you ready, Sanpao!"

Yu Xiaogang didn't waste time. He had to catch a ride before the beam disappeared.

"Huff! (Come on, Big Sau Gang!)" Luo Sanpao replied.

"Transform!"

Yu Xiaogang roared.

Luo Sanpao immediately let one rip on the spot. The powerful recoil launched him into the air.

Then he traced a perfect parabola through the sky, flying straight toward Yu Xiaogang.

The instant they made contact, the two began to merge.

A blast of thick purple smoke burst out, enveloping them.

"Crackling and popping..."

From within the smoke came a strange sound effect of farts and clanging gongs (the Saint Seiya theme, fart version).

"Fart God Divine Armor."

Yu Xiaogang gritted his teeth and roared.

"Show yourself!!!"

A breeze passed.

The smoke gradually dispersed.

A purple figure stood tall at its center.

First, two ribbons at his shoulders fluttered in the wind, each embroidered with several large characters:

Left ribbon: At the peak of farting, I look down upon the world.

Right ribbon: With Sanpao, the heavens are mine.

The smoke cleared completely, revealing Yu Xiaogang in all his glory.

He wore a gas mask and dark purple armor, with a huge patch of dermatitis at the center of his chest.

The toes of his shoes curled sharply upward, and three divine rings appeared behind him.

"What the hell is that getup?"

The Divine Official gaped in shock.

"A mere Divine Official like you dares to understand the beauty of this god?"

As he spoke, Yu Xiaogang suddenly opened his eyes. Two sharp beams of light burst from them, and his full aura flared.

"I command all the ways of farting!"

"Secret art!"

"Divine Skill: Anal Sun Three Cannons!!!"

Yu Xiaogang gathered his strength on the spot. Divine power gradually collected at the patch of dermatitis on his chest.

A visible yellow-purple wave of gas burst forth from him.

It blotted out the sky and covered the earth, surging with immense force!

Wherever the wave passed, even space seemed to warp.

Then came a second blast.

A third.

The Divine Official's pupils shrank.

"Not good! I can't dodge!"

The yellow-purple wave swallowed him in an instant.

"It's over..."

The Divine Official let out a scream, rolled his eyes, and fell straight to the ground.

He lay there, foaming at the mouth, limbs twitching, a look of terror still etched on his face.

Yu Xiaogang disdainfully fanned the air around his face with one hand.

This was his strongest attack for now.

It was so powerful that even he, the Fart God, could barely withstand it.

He walked over and prodded the Divine Official with his foot.

No response.

He prodded him again.

Still no response.

"Hmph."

"You insulted my look. This is what you get."

After speaking, Yu Xiaogang suddenly remembered something.

He immediately looked up toward the teleportation channel.

But the beam had already vanished.

The channel had clearly closed.

"Oh no!"

Yu Xiaogang hurried to the channel entrance. Seeing this, he was so furious he slapped his thigh.

"How am I supposed to get back to Douluo Continent!"

"Dong'er!!!"

Thinking of Bibi Dong, he panicked.

"Feng Yan! Couldn't you have waited a little longer!"

"There's someone who hasn't gotten on yet!"

"I haven't gotten on yet!"

Yu Xiaogang felt as though the sky had fallen.

There were only a few places in the Divine Realm where one could descend to the lower realm.

Besides the teleportation channel in front of him, all the others were guarded by the gods.

He was only a Third-Level Fart God. How could he possibly smuggle himself down there?

At the thought, Yu Xiaogang began pacing frantically in circles.

What should he do!

What should he do!

What should he do!

Dong'er was still waiting for him.

But he couldn't even get out of the Divine Realm.

Apparently sensing its master's agitation, Luo Sanpao separated from Yu Xiaogang.

Watching his master spin around like a top made his own head start spinning too.

Yu Xiaogang stopped, his eyes reddening.

"Sanpao, what should I do? Dong'er's still waiting for me."

Luo Sanpao tilted his head and thought for a moment, then suddenly pointed a forepaw at the Divine Official on the ground.

Yu Xiaogang looked down.

The Divine Official was still lying there, still foaming at the mouth, his limbs twitching every so often.

But at his waist...

There was a token.

The Teleportation Channel Management Token.

Yu Xiaogang's eyes lit up.

He rushed over, crouched down, and yanked the token off in one go.

"Sanpao, having you around really is my good fortune!"

Yu Xiaogang gripped the token, his hands trembling with excitement.

"With this, I can open the teleportation channel myself!"

He dashed toward the control panel.

The panel's light screen flickered, coordinates flashing rapidly across it.

Yu Xiaogang stared at the dense jumble of numbers and words, his head starting to spin.

"Douluo Continent... Where's Douluo Continent..."

He searched in a panic.

Luo Sanpao jumped onto the control panel and leaned in to help look.

One man and one beast, four eyes fixed on the light screen.

The longer Yu Xiaogang looked, the more anxious he became.

Although the teleportation channel could be opened manually, each activation came with restrictions.

If they wasted any more time, the Divine Realm guards would notice something was wrong and come running.

"Where is it!"

Sweat beaded on his forehead.

"Coo-coo."

Luo Sanpao suddenly let out a strange cry and tapped a coordinate on the light screen with his little paw.

Yu Xiaogang leaned closer to look.

But he couldn't make heads or tails of it.

That string of coordinates on the light screen looked like gibberish to him.

"Sanpao, what are you doing? Ouch~"

He scratched his head and looked at Luo Sanpao.

Luo Sanpao tilted his head and cried out again. "Coo-coo!"

Then he tapped the same spot on the light screen with his little paw.

Yu Xiaogang stared at that coordinate for three seconds.

Then he glanced toward the channel entrance.

Footsteps sounded faintly in the distance.

"Forget it!"

Yu Xiaogang gritted his teeth. "This one!"

He locked onto the coordinate and decisively activated the teleportation

The teleportation channel lit up again.

The beam unfolded slowly before his eyes.

Yu Xiaogang took a deep breath and picked up Luo Sanpao.

"Sanpao, let's go!"

"Huff!"

Man and beast leapt into the channel.

The light swallowed their figures.

A few seconds later, a squad of Divine Realm guards hurried over.

The guard at the front frowned at the Divine Official lying on the ground, foaming at the mouth.

"What happened here?"

No one answered.

Only the faint smell of farts still lingered in the air.

The guard covered his nose and waved a hand.

"Take him away."

"Yes."

Sea God Temple, study.

Tang San sat upright at his desk, holding an ancient book in his hand.

The incense burner on the desk sent up wisps of blue smoke, filling the air with the scent of sandalwood.

He suddenly put down his book and looked up toward the window.

His gaze pierced the sea of clouds and the passage of time, settling in a certain direction.

The corners of his mouth lifted slightly. "Looks like the plan worked."

If nothing unexpected had happened, Feng Yan had already reached the Clear Sky Sect.

Everything had gone just as he'd expected.

Tang San set down his teacup, preparing to return to his book.

Suddenly, his brow furrowed.

Another presence.

At that very moment, it had also left the Divine Realm.

Heading down to the lower realm, too.

To Douluo Continent, as well.

Tang San froze for a moment.

Then his expression turned peculiar.

That presence...

Why did it feel so familiar?

Who was it?!

(ps: The Fart God Divine Armor's chest rash was so disgusting that I had to hide it with a cape. Otherwise, it wouldn't pass review!!!)