Why was the adorable little boy screaming so much? Why was the purple-haired witch cackling so wickedly? And why were the elderly couple from the Divine Realm weeping bitter tears?
What lay behind all this? A distortion of human nature, or the collapse of morality?
Stay tuned for the grand family-education ethics documentary—<The Adorable Little Boy's Secret: The Purple-Haired Witch Who Took Such Good Care of Grandma Bai>
The next second.
Humiliated beyond words, Chen Doudou meekly accepted Bibi Dong's suggestion.
He trudged forward, like a little lamb being led to the slaughterhouse, glancing back every few steps as he headed toward the lunch stall.
"Doudou, perk up! You're the son of Asura God and Rakshasa God. Don't let us down! Show them your evil aura! Don't be scared—just rob them!"
Bibi Dong stood in the shadows some distance away, waving her fists at him and quietly cheering him on.
Chen Doudou took a deep breath and stood in front of the stall.
Chen Doudou took a deep breath, trying to recall what the bullies among the Soul Masters he'd seen back in the Divine Realm looked like.
He marched up to the stall and rose onto his tiptoes, trying to make himself look taller, then slapped his palm against the wooden counter.
"Smack!"
At least it made a loud noise.
"Oi! Your lunch smells so good, you know that?"
"Do you know this is Causeway Bay, Chen Doudou's turf?"
Chen Doudou tried to scowl and look more menacing, but with his delicate little face, curly purple hair, and ruby-red eyes, he looked less like a fearsome thug and more like a puffed-up kitten putting on a brave front.
Across from him, the woman selling boxed lunches looked like a gentle, elegant young wife in her thirties.
She wore plain cloth clothes and an apron, and stared blankly at him, ladle in hand.
One second.
Two seconds.
Three seconds.
The woman burst out laughing.
She set down the ladle, crouched, and gently pinched Chen Doudou's chubby little cheek. Her eyes brimmed with affection. "Well, well, whose adorable little boy are you? You're so cute, and you're playing at being a robber?"
Chen Doudou: "!!!"
No, ma'am, you've got the wrong script!
I'm here to rob you! I'm a thug!
Could you show a little respect for my profession?
Could you please cooperate and scream as you hand over the food?
Chen Doudou panicked and waved his little fists again, shouting fiercely, "I'm serious! Hand over the food! Or else... or else I'll make you regret it!"
"Ooh, so scary~"
The woman wasn't frightened at all. She only laughed harder and teased him, "So, little thug, what are you going to use to rob me?"
Chen Doudou was stumped.
He patted his completely empty pockets, then glanced at Bibi Dong.
From afar, Bibi Dong watched with a dark look on her face, fists clenched tight.
How was this a robbery?
You were just there being cute!
"I... I have a gem!"
"I'm telling you, this gem fell off the Ten-Thousand-Year Soul Beast Silver Dragon King. My dad fought him for three hundred rounds back then, and barely managed to get it."
In a burst of inspiration, Chen Doudou pulled a glittering little stone from his pocket. He'd picked it up along the way. "Here, you can have this. Give me the food!"
The woman looked at the ordinary pebble and couldn't stop laughing.
It reminded her of her own mischievous little girl, who had loved playing "shop" when she was little.
"All right, all right, little bandit, you win. Auntie's scared."
Still smiling, the woman stood up and grabbed a large lunchbox. She piled in another generous spoonful of braised pork, then even peeled a tea egg and put it inside. "Here, this is your protection money. Take it! Is that enough?"
Chen Doudou clutched the heavy lunchbox, completely dumbfounded.
D-did I really pull off a robbery?
Wait, why did it feel like she'd just given it to me?
"Hold on, there's plenty for this pretty young lady, too."
The woman looked over at Bibi Dong and warmly beckoned her. "Miss, why don't you join us? The little one's so cute, he must be hungry. Auntie will give you another bowl!"
As soon as she finished speaking,
the lunchbox nearly slipped from Chen Doudou's arms.
He turned stiffly to look at Bibi Dong in the distance.
By then, Bibi Dong's stunning face had gone completely livid.
Her purple hair stirred without a breeze, and a terrifying aura of gloom radiated around her. The twig she'd been holding crumbled to dust with a sharp crack.
She gritted her teeth and forced out the words:
"Chen! Dou! Dou!"
"I told you to rob her! You went begging for food? And you did it by selling your looks?!"
She'd deliberately sent Doudou to steal the food so he could take his first step toward "doing evil" and abandon those impractical fantasies about being kind!
And what had he done?
He'd gone over there and begged for food!
Begging was bad enough, but he'd gotten it by acting cute. That was the lowest of the low!
Chen Doudou: "..."
Help, I don't want to do this anymore. I want to go back to the Divine Realm!
Hugging the lunchbox, Chen Doudou shrank his shoulders and muttered pitifully, "Waaah, Sister Dong, I didn't. I really didn't sell my looks... I just slapped the counter, and then she laughed..."
"You... You're the one acting hurt now? You're going to be the death of me!"
Bibi Dong snatched the lunchbox from Chen Doudou, popped it open, and took a couple of furious bites to vent her anger.
Ah, she hadn't eaten this in ten thousand years. The braised pork in the human world was so good!
No, wait!
Was the point really that the braised pork was so good?!
"Doudou, give me half your braised pork."
"No way."
"Hmm? What did you say?!"
"Waaah... You're even stealing a little kid's food."
Bibi Dong looked at the lunchbox brimming with braised pork and snorted. "Who told you to beg for food?"
At that moment, Chen Doudou finally understood what it meant to have his heart set on the moon, only for the moon to shine down on a ditch.
I was supposed to be a big bad thug, but my looks were too good. My abilities just wouldn't let me pull it off.
Meanwhile, in the Divine Realm,
God of Destruction laughed so hard he rolled right off his chair. "Hahahaha! A robbery turned into begging for food by acting cute! Asura, is this what you call turning him from good to evil?"
God of Evil wiped the tears of laughter from his eyes. "What a genius! Most people do evil by being vicious. He does it by being cute. He manages to rob someone for a boxed lunch and gets fed in return. You won't find another one like him in all the realms!"
Nearby, Rakshasa God's face was livid and flushed. She felt as if she'd lost all face and disgraced the Divine Realm itself.
Humiliation!
This was without a doubt the most outrageous, most humiliating scene in the Divine Realm's history!
Asura God glared at God of Trickery, who sat below him, and gritted his teeth. "Trickery! Is this the foolproof path to turning him from good to evil that you swore you'd found? Is this what you meant when you said Doudou would sink into darkness?"
God of Trickery gently waved his feather fan and replied without a hint of panic, "My lord, don't worry. Don't you think Doudou is being truly evil this way?"
"Oh? And how so?"
"Think about it. Making the enemy surrender without a fight—isn't that the highest form of evil? He doesn't even need to lift a finger. He just has to stand there, and the other side offers up tribute!"
"How is he some beggar asking for food? Young Master Doudou has grasped the essence of winning people over with virtue—the highest form of evil: hypocrisy!"
"He's using the appearance of kindness to rob people!"
Asura God and Rakshasa God exchanged a glance. Their angry expressions froze in an instant.
Damn! That actually made a little sense!
This kid was hiding his true depths!
"Doudou, you really are my son!"
"Of course. He was raised by his mother."
God of Destruction: "..."
I have never seen anyone so shameless!
"Mom, why are there several lunchboxes missing today? And the money's short, too."
Jiang Nannan had just gotten out of school at noon. She went to her mother's stall and, as usual, counted the money her mother had earned that day, only to discover a lot was missing.
Recalling what had just happened, Mother Jiang couldn't help laughing. "Someone robbed me."
Jiang Nannan's little face scrunched up with anger, and a flash of fury crossed her big, beautiful eyes. "Mom, who robbed you? That's awful! I'm going to find them and settle the score."
She clenched her little fists and secretly vowed to find the thug who'd bullied her mother!
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