As an Older Brother, You Always Have to Keep Unscrupulous People Away from Your Little Sister

Having made his declaration,

Sogo Doma was still smiling. He even held up his index finger for emphasis. Every word rang true.

In reality...

Inside Sogo Doma's mind:

I'm done for. I really said it out loud. How am I supposed to maintain relationships after saying something like that? Not that I wanted to socialize with these brats anyway. But why did I listen to that useless little sister of mine...

She's nothing but a good-for-nothing, yet she keeps trying to dictate her Onii-chan's life. Why?

Sogo Doma pondered for a moment, then arrived at the likeliest answer:

She wants to switch roles and become the older sister, doesn't she?

What an evil ambition. A little sister wanting to become an older sister is somehow even more despicable than an evil god's descent. She's a cancer on the world! If Umaru's developed this condition, she'll destroy the whole world. The universe will be dancing at her fingertips!

Sogo Doma lowered his head and sighed.

And then, what awaited him was...

Teacher Takahashi slamming her lesson plan down on the desk.

"Sogo Doma, what nonsense did you just say?" She was still hoping he could somehow muddy the waters.

However,

the students in the classroom were already furious.

"Hey, hey, what's with all this sadist talk? The school's really going to let a pervert say that?"

"Get out! Class 2-D doesn't need some sadist!"

"You bastard, you saying that because you want to fight?"

At that moment,

only one woman, just waking from the border between sleep and wakefulness, had her eyes wide open. "Sogo Doma! That guy's the transfer student in our class?"

Utaha Kasumigaoka covered her mouth. She'd spent all lunch feeling annoyed with him and wanting to get closer to him, but she'd never expected they'd be in the same class!

"Do you think a new transfer student would know every big name on campus?" That was what he'd said.

Now that she thought about it, he hadn't been lying.

"And by the way, people say I'm a sadistic scumbag..." He'd said that too.

Utaha Kasumigaoka wondered who introduced themselves like that. It was as if he wanted to shut everyone else out of his social circle. Did he not want to associate with her? Sogo Doma!

Until...

The first class of the afternoon. Teacher Takahashi had arrived a little late. She'd gone to another mixer yesterday, hadn't she? Utaha thought.

But first, she'd sleep. There wouldn't be any more chances during the day.

"This is our new... transfer student..." In her half-asleep state, Utaha Kasumigaoka thought she heard something. But what did that have to do with her? Sleep...

Until...

"I'm Sogo Doma! ..."

Utaha Kasumigaoka opened her sleeping eyes...

That guy was introducing himself like that, of all things... It was just like some unrestrained drifter~~~. Looking at Sogo Doma's smiling face, she wondered, did he even know what he'd just said?

She couldn't blame herself for thinking so. Japan's small-group culture and its strict unspoken rules about reading the room were no joke.

Even she...

Though she was Toyogasaki's number one, she'd been excluded from the cliques and the atmosphere.

Whether people called her an unattainable beauty or Sleeping Beauty, beneath those flattering descriptions lurked nothing but blatant malice and an atmosphere of isolation.

Utaha Kasumigaoka didn't know how to describe this phenomenon, so she poured her feelings into her writing.

When all was said and done, Utaha Kasumigaoka was just a sixteen-year-old girl with no friends.

And yet,

Utaha Kasumigaoka looked at the smiling face at the podium again. The same declaration, just as explosive. She'd stake her life that no one else would ever introduce themselves like that.

That was an introduction from someone who had no intention of fitting in!

At the podium, Sogo Doma looked at his classmates' furious faces and smiled too. This time, his smile was even more delighted!

He turned around.

"Teacher, it looks like the other students are outraged. I don't think I'm suited to stay for the rest of this class. Also, you really should go see the world outside."

As if fleeing in defeat, Sogo Doma left the classroom, leaving behind a thoroughly bewildered Renna Takahashi and a roomful of furious students.

After a long moment,

"Sogo Doma!" Renna Takahashi finally managed to call out his name.

The other students: "..."

Outraged? Who do you think caused all this!!!!

Utaha Kasumigaoka smiled behind her lips. That guy really was one of a kind!

Still,

how had someone like him gotten to know a big shot like God's Tongue? She was growing more and more curious about him.

She looked around and realized there were no empty desks left. There was only one desk, in the last row beside hers. Did that mean the transfer student would become her seatmate?

Elsewhere,

Sogo Doma, who had left the classroom of his own accord, grinned. "That useless Umaru never expected that the introduction she gave me would turn into an excuse to skip class. Hahaha... This is so delightful!"

He checked the time. It wasn't even two in the afternoon. Sogo Doma grew delighted all over again. "Since I've already checked in with the teacher, I don't really feel like attending afternoon classes either. Heh... It's time to teach that useless little sister of mine a lesson."

With that, he went straight to the shoe lockers and changed into his outdoor shoes. Under the stunned gaze of the gatekeeper—or maybe the discipline director—he leaped over the wall and left the school...

It was much easier than at Totsuki.

At exactly half past two in the afternoon, in a residential neighborhood not too far from Toyogasaki,

at the Doma Residence,

Sogo Doma was about to unlock the door when his little sister opened it first, as if she'd known he was coming. It was almost perfect teamwork.

Except...

"I'm home," Sogo Doma said, sounding a little uncertain.

"Welcome home." Umaru Doma, maintaining the poise of a young lady, handed him his slippers with a radiant smile. She didn't ask why her older brother had come home so early.

But,

Sogo Doma continued to hesitate...

Only after accepting the red tea Umaru had brewed did Sogo Doma finally speak. "Umaru, who came by today? Or did you do something? I'm a little unused to seeing you like this."

Click.

The hamster Umaru, who had just picked up the teapot, was struck by a critical hit.

But when she thought about what she'd done today,

Umaru Doma wanted to die of embarrassment. How had she failed to keep her hands under control?

After standing frozen for a long while, the hamster Umaru finally squeaked, "R-right, Onii-chan, Hijikata came by to see you today."

"Hijikata?" Sogo Doma subconsciously touched his chin. "What did he come looking for me for? Wait!" He'd spotted a crucial detail that needed a blind monk's help to resolve!

Had that useless little sister just said "Big Brother Hijikata"?

She'd really called him that?

He should've put poison in Hijikata's mayonnaise and poisoned him to death back then!

A man like Hijikata deserved heavenly punishment. He'd actually forced someone else's little sister to call him big brother. Die, Hijikata! Hijikata, die...

With that feeling in his heart, Sogo Doma turned around with a benevolent smile and looked at his little sister. "Umaru, didn't I tell you before? You have to be polite. Don't call him Big Brother Hijikata. Call him Mister. Repeat after me: Hi-ji-ka-ta-san—Mr. Hijikata!"

His tone was benevolent too!

Umaru Doma looked confused. "Um..."

"It's all right, Umaru. Tell me how you ended up interacting with that guy Hijikata today." Sogo Doma was still smiling benevolently. But before Umaru could say anything, he muttered in a low voice, "Once I get the full story, I'll send that guy straight to the Sanzu River. Heh..."