[Year X, Month X, Day X, late at night.]
[I almost died.]
[That old madman Tang Hao really showed up. Without a word, he swung his hammer. If I hadn't been quick-witted (crossed out), if Elder Gui hadn't arrived in time, today would've been the anniversary of my death.]
[But now that I think about it, that old bastard Tang Hao is a bully who only picks on the weak.]
[The moment he saw Elder Gui, he ran faster than a rabbit. So this is the legendary Clear Sky Douluo? More like the Clear Sky Run-away Douluo, if you ask me.]
[And another thing...]
[You woman with the surname Bi, aren't you being a little too perverted?]
[It's one thing to send someone to protect me, but you actually spied on my private life?]
[You even had to interfere when I was combing Xiao Wu's hair? What, were you jealous?]
[Tsk, tsk, tsk. The dignified Pope was jealous of a rabbit.]
[If the world found out that His Holiness the Pope, cold and imposing in public, was actually a peeping tom and a jealous shrew in private...]
[That'd be too beautiful a sight to imagine.]
[But seriously, Dong'er, isn't your possessiveness a little too much?]
[You won't even let me comb a rabbit's hair. What if I comb Qian Renxue's hair someday, or Hu Liena's, or Bo Saixi's...? Would you tear Spirit Hall apart?]
[Sigh. It's hard being a man, and even harder being Bibi Dong's man (crossed out)—her disciple.]
[I got such a fright tonight. I won't get up unless I get a hug.]
[If only Dong'er could post a selfie in the diary to comfort me... Too bad this lousy diary doesn't have that feature.]
[Forget it. Time to sleep! Anything's possible in a dream!]
Spirit City, Pope Palace.
"Crack!"
The fourth teacup met its end.
At the words in the diary about her being jealous, Bibi Dong's whole face turned red as a boiled prawn.
"Utter nonsense!"
"Who's jealous?!"
"This seat is only worried he'll neglect his cultivation for frivolous things! I'm simply making sure he keeps up with his training!"
Fuming, she slammed the diary down on the table, her chest heaving.
But after she finished scolding him, a strange feeling she'd never experienced before quietly began to stir in her heart.
Jealous?
She touched her cheek without thinking. It felt a little hot.
"You little rascal!"
Bibi Dong bit her lip, her gaze turning hazy for a moment.
"Combing Qian Renxue's hair, combing Hu Liena's hair."
"Hmph, dream on!"
"I'd like to see what tricks you can pull under my watch!"
Although she spoke fiercely, Bibi Dong herself didn't realize it.
Her heart, frozen by Yu Xiaogang, was slowly being pried open by this reckless disciple.
"Someone come."
"Organize the information Gui Mei sent back."
"And also..."
Bibi Dong hesitated, as if making a difficult decision.
"Go to the storehouse and find that nightgown woven from Heavenly Silkworm Silk."
"This seat wants to try it on tonight."
Since you said there's no selfie, then I'll just... Hmph!
Morning.
The first rays of sunlight streamed through the broken window lattice and fell across Su Yun's face.
He blearily opened his eyes and instinctively reached out to the space beside him.
Empty.
"Ugh! That hammer sure packed a punch last night. My back's still sore."
Su Yun rubbed his aching back as he sat up. Looking at the wreckage all around him, the corners of his mouth twitched twice.
That was the price of getting up close and personal with a Titled Douluo.
Even with Gui Mei blocking the blow, the shock waves were no joke.
"Knock, knock, knock."
Someone gently rapped on the door. A moment later, a little head poked inside.
Xiao Wu.
She wore a pink nightgown, her hair a bird's nest, and hugged the half-eaten Red Jade Carrot as she rubbed her sleepy eyes.
"Brother Su Yun... I need to pee..."
Su Yun: "..."
Was this really a hundred-thousand-year-old Rogue Rabbit?
She was clearly just a little kid who hadn't grown up!
He sighed, resigned himself to getting up, and took the future Soft Bone Charm Rabbit to find the toilet.
After seeing the little ancestor through washing up and combing her hair—
Yes, he combed it again, though Bibi Dong didn't see this time—
Su Yun took Xiao Wu to the dining room in the side courtyard.
The table was already laden with an elegant breakfast.
Crystal shrimp dumplings, jadeite siu mai, and bird's nest porridge.
Su Yun had specifically told the kitchen to make them. The theme was luxury, and the goal was to corrupt a Soul Beast's will.
Time to bring out the sugar-coated bullets.
"Wow!"
Xiao Wu's eyes lit up at once, and her rabbit ears stood straight up.
She jumped onto a chair, grabbed a shrimp dumpling, and stuffed it into her mouth. Her cheeks puffed out like a greedy little hamster.
"Delicious! So delicious!"
"Brother Su Yun, is everything in the human world this tasty?"
Su Yun took an elegant sip of porridge and answered unhurriedly:
"Not quite."
"That kid Tang San is probably crouched outside the cafeteria right now, gnawing on a hard, dry bun and drinking free soup that tastes like dishwater."
"Pfft—"
Xiao Wu nearly choked.
She pictured the scene, then looked at the crystal shrimp dumplings in front of her. She immediately felt as if she were in heaven.
"That Tang San is so pitiful,"
Xiao Wu mumbled through a mouthful. Though she said he was pitiful,
her hands didn't stop for a moment. She grabbed another siu mai.
Su Yun's lips curled slightly.
That was more like it.
Without comparison, there was no pain.
I'll make sure you can't live without this life of luxury, from your stomach to your heart.
When that dirt-poor Tang San tried to hit on you again?
Heh.
Unless he can turn Blue Silver Grass into some kind of gourmet dish.
"By the way, Xiao Wu."
Su Yun put down his spoon, picked up a napkin to wipe his mouth, and suddenly remembered something.
"You're a rabbit. Shouldn't you be eating greens?"
Xiao Wu paused, glanced at the meat-filled siu mai in her hand, then looked at Su Yun and answered with complete confidence:
"But the wrapper's made of flour! Flour comes from wheat, and wheat is vegetarian!"
"So this is vegetarian!"
Su Yun: "..."
A flawless argument.
Even Newton would climb out of his coffin to applaud you.
"Fine, fine. If you say it's vegetarian, then it's vegetarian."
Su Yun shook his head helplessly and pulled a yellowed ancient book from the System Space. (He'd actually cobbled it together overnight.)
"Now that you're full, it's time to get down to business."
"This is a cultivation method I tailored just for you: the Jade Rabbit Pounding Medicine Sutra."
"Don't look at me like that. This is a god-tier technique! Once you practice it, your Soul Power will grow rapidly, and you'll become more beautiful, with long legs and a slim waist."
At the mention of long legs and a slim waist, Xiao Wu's eyes instantly turned into light bulbs.
"I want to practice it! I want to!"
Meanwhile.
Notting Academy, Dorm Seven.
Tang San sat cross-legged on his hard wooden bed, circulating the Mysterious Heaven Skill as he tried to calm the agitation in his heart.
He hadn't slept a wink last night.
Every time he closed his eyes, he saw Su Yun combing Xiao Wu's hair, along with that heart-piercing line: "Your wife is so soft."
"Damn it!"
Tang San suddenly opened his eyes, a violet light swirling in them.
"Su Yun, I'm going to kill you!"
"And Xiao Wu, why couldn't you wait for me? Why couldn't you see how good I am?"
Before you continue