"Skinny woman!"
"Crop-top girl!"
"Hard-as-iron tin can!"
"Shameless exhibitionist!"
The argument grew louder and louder, threatening to tear the guildhall roof right off.
Mirajane and Erza were like two fighting roosters, each going for the other's sore spots.
Mirajane folded her arms and gave Erza a disdainful once-over.
"Do you wear all that armor because you're insecure about your figure? I guess that makes sense. You're so stiff, there's not much to look at."
"What did you say?!"
Erza flushed with anger and immediately Requipped into Armor of the Flame Empress. The greatsword in her hands slammed heavily into the floor.
"A true warrior relies on her strength, not on showing skin to grab people's attention! You shameless delinquent!"
"Huh? Showing off?"
A vein throbbed on Mirajane's forehead. The demon wings behind her snapped open, and a storm of black magic swept the tables and chairs around them into the air.
"You're just jealous, aren't you? Jealous because I was born beautiful!"
"Fight me, Mirajane!"
"Just what I was hoping for, Erza!"
Just as the two looked ready to tear the place apart for real,
Elfman and Lu Chongwei stood nearby, sweating profusely.
Elfman huddled in a corner, trembling as he watched the sister who had once been gentle but was now unbelievably fierce.
"A m-man can... know when not to get involved..."
Lu Chongwei was even more helpless.
Caught in the middle of the storm, even his hair had been blown into disarray.
"Hey, you two..."
Lu Chongwei timidly raised a hand.
"If you're going to fight, could you at least take it outside? This table was only fixed a few days ago..."
"Shut up!"
They shouted in unison. Their murderous glares instantly made Lu Chongwei obediently close his mouth.
While battle raged on this side,
Natsu had completely shut out the outside world and devoted himself wholeheartedly to the great task of "hatching the egg."
"If I'm going to love it... then I have to keep it warm!"
Natsu crouched in front of the egg, both hands blazing with fire as he spoke with utmost seriousness.
"Burn, flames of my love!"
He brought his flaming hands right up to the egg.
"Stop! You idiot!"
Gray appeared from who knew where and kicked Natsu flying.
"Are you trying to roast it? It's an egg, not a piece of barbecue!"
Gray stood bare-chested, looking at him as if he were an idiot.
"If you cook it, what hatches won't be a dragon. It'll be a fried egg!"
"Then what do you suggest?!"
Natsu scrambled up from the floor, rubbing his backside as he shouted.
"It needs warmth! Warmth!"
"Then use your body heat!"
Just as the two were arguing,
a gentle voice spoke up.
"Um... could I give it a try?"
Lisanna walked over.
She had grown quite a bit over the past year. Wearing a cute dress, she had a soothing smile on her face.
Even though her sister had turned into a delinquent and her brother had become a hot-blooded idiot who kept saying "a real man," Lisanna was still the same gentle little angel.
"Take Over: Bird!"
Lisanna called out softly.
A flash of light passed over her.
Her arms turned into enormous wings, and soft feathers covered her body as she transformed into a colorful bird.
She gently gathered the enormous egg into her arms and wrapped it completely in her warm, thick wings.
"It's so warm..."
Natsu leaned over and touched the feathers, his eyes shining.
"Lisanna, you're a genius! This is sure to work!"
"Hehe, as long as we take turns looking after it, I'm sure it'll hatch."
Lisanna smiled, making for a heartwarming scene.
However,
that warmth didn't last long.
Not far away, Wakaba was smoking. He watched them, then suddenly blew out a ring of smoke and said with a mischievous grin,
"Well, well. Young people these days are certainly full of energy."
He glanced at Lu Chongwei, who was caught between Mirajane and Erza, then suddenly raised his voice.
"Speaking of which, Lu Chongwei, what kind of girl are you into?"
"An elegant, dashing lady knight like Erza? Or a fiery, sexy little kitten like Mirajane?"
The words were like a spark thrown into a powder keg.
The whole guildhall erupted.
Mirajane and Erza, who had been arguing, stopped at the same time.
In perfect unison, they stiffly turned their heads and fixed their eyes on Lu Chongwei.
Their earlier hostility seemed to vanish, replaced by an even stranger and more dangerous atmosphere.
"Good question."
Mirajane narrowed her eyes, a dangerous smile curling her lips.
She reached out and pinched the soft flesh at Lu Chongwei's waist, squeezing just a little.
"Lu Chongwei, tell me. Do you like that stiff, boring tin-can woman?"
"Or do you like me, the..."
She leaned in toward Lu Chongwei's ear on purpose, her warm breath brushing his neck.
"...delinquent girl?"
On the other side,
Erza wasn't about to back down either.
She didn't lay a hand on him, but the sword in her hand slid half an inch from its sheath, gleaming coldly.
"Lu Chongwei, honesty is a knight's virtue."
Erza looked serious, though the tips of her ears were faintly red.
"Don't let appearances mislead you. Tell her that inner nobility is what matters most."
Lu Chongwei felt like a little rabbit caught in the gaze of two dragons.
Pain gripped his waist while a chill prickled his neck.
The other guild members began to egg them on.
"Ooh! A love triangle!"
"Lu Chongwei! Pick one! Pick one!"
"A real man takes them both!" Macao shouted.
"Drop dead!"
Lu Chongwei glared fiercely at Macao.
He looked at Mirajane, smiling with a knife behind her back, then at Erza, standing ready for battle.
"Um..."
Lu Chongwei swallowed, his mind racing.
"I think... well..."
"Well, what?!" The two of them stepped closer.
"Actually... Uncle Wakaba is my one true love!"
Lu Chongwei shouted. While they stood stunned, he immediately used Flash Step.
"Whoosh!"
His figure vanished.
Only the barstool, still wobbling, remained.
"Bastard! Don't run!"
"Stop! Explain yourself!"
Mirajane and Erza came to their senses and immediately chased after him.
"Lu Chongwei! You coward!"
The next morning.
Outside the Fairy Tail guildhall,
a furtive figure was hiding around the corner, poking his head out to peer inside.
It was Lu Chongwei.
He had dark circles under his eyes, clearly having slept poorly. He'd been afraid those two women would chase him down in his dreams.
"Phew... Looks like they're not here."
Lu Chongwei checked carefully. Only after confirming that the red-haired and white-haired figures were nowhere to be seen did he relax and slip into the guildhall.
He dropped into a seat across from Cana, then slumped over the table like a deflated ball.
"Get me a drink... no, milk after all."
Lu Chongwei spoke listlessly.
Cana was holding a keg while letting the liquor breathe. Seeing him like that, she couldn't help bursting into laughter.
"What's the matter? Even our S-Class Mage gets scared?"
"Don't ask."
Lu Chongwei looked miserable and scratched his head.
"Those two are monsters. They start arguing the moment they see each other, then drag me in to settle it."
"I'm not a judge or a relationship expert."
"Yesterday they nearly tore me in half."
Thinking back to what happened yesterday, Lu Chongwei was still shaken.
"Do you think they're just bored? A year ago, Mirajane was a little girl who could do nothing but cry. How did she get fiercer than Erza?"
Cana shook her head with a meaningful look at Lu Chongwei.
"Idiot."
"Women only act this way around someone they care about."
"Huh?"
Lu Chongwei stared at her in confusion.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean..."
Cana took a sip of her drink and smiled mysteriously.
"Your romantic troubles are only just beginning."
Before you continue