Tony Stark and Norman Osborn had already stolen the spotlight enough. Dressed as women, they really were so ugly that it was hard to look at them for long.
People had assumed Manhattan Axe would put on the same kind of show, but who could have guessed he'd put on heavy makeup and a wedding dress?
Mr. Battleaxe's love life was a spectacle known the world over.
A gunwoman sexy enough to make your head spin, and a noble alien queen.
Alvin had two dazzling stars all to himself!
It wouldn't be an exaggeration to say that 90% of the men in the world were waiting for the day they'd hear Alvin had messed up.
This was supposed to be their chance!
No man could please two women at once at an event involving wedding dresses.
But when Manhattan Axe put on a wedding dress himself, things seemed, maybe, perhaps, probably, to have gotten a little different.
At any rate, the two actual ladies wore stern expressions, but everyone could see the amusement in their eyes.
Especially when barefoot Alvin paused and turned, then scratched an itchy spot on his leg with his foot. Thanks to his sons' and daughters' ridiculous antics behind him, his legs had been left completely exposed.
The giant screen in front of the runway showed an upskirt shot taken by a lecherous photographer, prompting a burst of laughter from everyone.
Alvin angrily flipped off the perverted photographer below, swore, then turned and shot a warning look at the handful of kids who couldn't behave.
Little Ginny wore a white dress that had gotten filthy. She wrinkled her little nose and stuck out her tongue at her dad, as if her clean, spotless dad no longer belonged on her team.
To the lilting music, Alvin walked