The Absurd Jianghu

The big-chested woman sitting across the fire was clearly identical to the big-chested woman who had left earlier. Forget her face—even her hairstyle was the same.

No, even that tiny tear mole beneath her eye was identical.

And you were telling me the one from before wasn't you?

Was this woman schizophrenic?

Duan Yun could not help growing tense.

Honestly, he had formed a decent impression of this big-chested woman and the four purple-clad constables. They looked like they were hunting a female ghost, after all. But what was this supposed to mean?

For a moment, he felt that there might not be a single normal person here tonight.

Seeing that Duan Yun still did not believe her, the woman folded her arms beneath her chest and explained coolly, "That was my elder sister."

"We're twin sisters."

"I have a mole here. She doesn't."

As she spoke, the woman tugged her collar open slightly, revealing a small mole along the upper edge of her collarbone.

Then she closed her collar again.

Watching this, Duan Yun said thoughtfully, "You really aren't your sister. Your sister had more inner fire."

"Hm?"

This time, it was the woman's turn to show a puzzled expression.

Yes, Duan Yun had already determined that this big-chested woman was not the same person as before. It was not because of that mole, but because of her symptoms.

From his perspective as a gynecologist, that elder sister had possessed rather more inner fire.

"Aren't you going to help?" Duan Yun asked, pointing at the two little flags.

"No need. With four purple-clad constables there, my sister will be fine."

As she spoke, the big-chested younger sister lazily stretched. The curves beneath her robes became even more pronounced, leaving Duan Yun's eyes with nowhere to hide.

At that moment, the woman looked at Duan Yun's face and asked the same question her sister had earlier.

"Did you encounter that woman in red?"

Duan Yun nodded.

"She actually didn't abduct you?" the woman asked in slight surprise.

"Maybe you were chasing her too closely, and she was afraid of being delayed."

Duan Yun had no idea why they both cared so much about this.

"No. The Red Chamber Fairies have a movement art all their own. Even if she brought you along, it would not affect her much. Along the way, she has already been fleeing while fucking seven men."

"Fleeing while fucking?"

Duan Yun was utterly shaken.

"They can fuck while flying, and they will not slow down either," the big-chested younger sister explained.

Duan Yun was stunned again. "Is that female ghost really that terrifying?"

A wave of lingering fear rose in him. If he had not caught her off guard and shot her in time, the consequences would have been too dreadful to contemplate.

"Of course they're terrifying. Those fairies from the Red Tower claim to be immortals who fell from Heaven Court into the mortal world. Only after enduring tribulations can they return to Heaven Court."

"And the tribulation they speak of is continuously fucking men—fucking handsome men like you, then tossing them aside once they are done. The victim loses all his yang energy and can only lie there waiting to die for the rest of his life."

The big-chested younger sister explained.

It was clear that this big-chested younger sister was rather talkative. Seeing that Duan Yun was a newcomer, she continued, "Actually, the Red Chamber Fairies are not the most terrifying. The most terrifying one is Jade Guanyin of Yellow Jade Island."

"Jade Guanyin?"

"They say she is the most beautiful woman in the world. She also likes abducting men and fucking them. Any man she fucks becomes a Living Dead who can only obey her."

"However, most of the men Jade Guanyin abducts are fairly famous. They are either talented young masters of great clans or renowned youthful prodigies. You may look decent, but you do not need to worry too much."

Duan Yun thought, Who are you looking down on?

"In short, when wandering the jianghu, never provoke women you should not provoke."

The big-chested younger sister kindly reminded him.

Unable to contain his curiosity, Duan Yun asked, "What about you?"

The big-chested younger sister replied with a relaxed expression, "A good woman like me is naturally very rare. My sister and I are divine female constables of the Clear Qi Bureau. We came this time because those Red Chamber Fairies fucked too many men, so we came to arrest her."

Just then, a trail of purple smoke rose in the distance.

The big-chested younger sister stood up and said, "My sister is calling me. I should go."

Duan Yun rose with her and said, "Excuse me."

"You don't need to ask my name. Even if you did, I would not tell you, lest I make you indulge in vain fantasies. You may look decent, but you are not worthy of me. My family would not approve either, and I would never like you."

"Farewell."

As she spoke, the big-chested younger sister scooped up the two little flags, then strode away on her long legs.

Watching her departing back, Duan Yun could not help complaining, "What kind of cringe woman is this? I only wanted to ask for directions."

Duan Yun's experiences tonight had truly been bizarre and eventful.

It was only his first night, yet the Red Chamber Fairies, the divine female constables of the Clear Qi Bureau, and Jade Guanyin mentioned by those female constables had all filled him with a sense of strange absurdity.

He could not help summarizing, "None of the people who practice martial arts here are normal. They either kill or fuck."

Even the divine female constables of the Clear Qi Bureau, who appeared to be on the righteous side, were cringe women.

Duan Yun felt the strangeness and absurdity of this world. By comparison, even the "brat" in Riverside City who loved kicking people and smashing things seemed somewhat more normal.

This world was probably truly sick, and full of danger.

Whatever. For now, he could only take one step at a time. At the very least, he needed to master his swordsmanship first, wipe out that brat, and worry about the rest later.

As he sat there, dawn arrived.

Once the morning light painted the dark and terrifying wilderness with color, Duan Yun felt as though he had returned from the set of a ghost film to the human world.

Of course, the gravestones within that gloomy forest still filled him with a sinister chill.

Duan Yun did not dare delay.

He needed to find a road quickly, or he would probably have to spend another night in this terrifying wilderness.

Yet after following the little path for only about two li, the outline of a small town appeared in his sight.

Well then. If he had walked another ten-odd minutes last night, he would not have needed to sleep outside.

Still, he did not think last night's suffering had been for nothing. After all, those experiences had taught him a few things.

Perhaps this was the jianghu: surprises and scares everywhere.

This little town was naturally not the Qingsong Market Duan Yun had intended to visit, but a place called Clear Tea Market.

When a place ended in "market," it usually meant business was done there.

Clear Tea Market naturally dealt in tea.

Not long after dawn, mist hung hazily through the mountain forest, and Duan Yun could already see vast stretches of tea fields.

Some diligent tea farmers were already busy at work among the fields.

Duan Yun entered the town, and the entire little town was gradually waking up.

Quite a few mules, laden with basket after basket of tea leaves, went in and out of several larger tea shops.

After a night of turmoil, Duan Yun was somewhat hungry as well.

So he went to an oil-tea shop and ordered a bowl of the local oil tea.

So-called oil tea was actually stir-fried flour made into a paste, usually without any tea leaves. Perhaps because Clear Tea Market truly had an abundance of tea, this oil tea actually contained some broken tea leaves, making it fragrant and delicious.

After breakfast, Duan Yun began looking for somewhere to stay.

He no longer wanted to go to Qingsong Market. Clear Tea Market was quite good, only a hundred li from Riverside City, making it convenient for him to return at any time and slaughter the Black Bear Gang to the last man.

The night before had made Duan Yun understand the dangers of this world. What he needed most now was a relatively peaceful environment in which to increase his strength.

Not only did he need to kill everyone in the Black Bear Gang, but the next time he encountered something like a Red Chamber Fairy, he would definitely cut her down as well.

"Gynecologist, I'll remember you."

He still remembered what that woman in red had said last night.

You can hold a grudge, but I can't?

Once he mastered his divine art, he would surely slaughter every Red Chamber Fairy, so that he would not have to tremble in fear whenever he walked down the road, worrying about being fucked.

Though Duan Yun could not even be considered newly initiated into the jianghu, lofty ambitions rose within him.

Because he knew that he was a one-in-ten-thousand genius of the sword!

Once he became the Sword God, where in the world could he not go? What was there to fear from killing or fucking?