Call It Vought

Just as he thought he was doomed, about to be smashed into a pile of flesh.

Whoosh!

A blue afterimage flashed past.

Wu Yanzu dove down even faster and, less than a hundred meters from the ground, casually... caught him, then slowed down and descended gently.

"Oh, got you."

"..." Jameson had stopped thinking.

A few seconds later.

Wu Yanzu flew back into the office littered with glass and casually tossed Jameson onto the carpet.

"Bang."

Jameson lay sprawled on the floor like a heap of mud, coughing violently and greedily gulping down air.

A pungent stench spread across the floor.

...He had pissed himself from fear.

"Ugh..."

Wu Yanzu stepped back two paces in disgust and swept him with X-Ray Vision.

"Tsk, tsk... Jonah, your... bladder doesn't seem too healthy.

Your prostate's a little swollen too."

Jameson trembled all over. He looked up at this "demon," his teeth chattering.

Wu Yanzu slowly crouched down, the "perfect" smile returning to his face.

He patted Jameson's wet cheek.

"Listen, Jonah. I'm New York's hero. People... love me."

"And you," he pointed at the puddle on the floor, "are a smart man."

"So, for tomorrow's front page, I hope to see something... positive."

"For example, 'Homelander: New York's Guardian Angel?' Or... 'J. Jonah Jameson: I Owe Homelander an Apology'?"

He cocked his head. "Which headline... do you think is better?"

"...Guardian... Guardian Angel..." Jameson forced out those words with all the strength he had.

"Good boy."

Wu Yanzu stood up and straightened his uniform.

Whoosh—

He vanished into the night.

Only J. Jonah Jameson remained in the office, along with the warm puddle between his legs...

Meanwhile, Wu Yanzu returned to his penthouse apartment.

"Ha." Wu Yanzu took a sip of Anthony's treasured 1982 Happy Water, delightedly switched on the television.

"...Affected by the Battle of New York, Stark Industries' stock price has fluctuated sharply... But today, Anthony Starr, the sole heir of the now-defunct Starr Group, has confirmed his return. Starr Group's stock price has surged by 300%..."

His phone rang at just the right moment.

"Mr. Starr," said the voice on the other end. It was the special counsel and assistant he had hired at Starr Group. "The board is ready, and all your assets have been unfrozen. The group... awaits your orders at any time."

"Very good." Wu Yanzu walked to the floor-to-ceiling window and looked down over the city that belonged to him.

"Keep everything in the group as it is. Register a new company for me. A media and public relations company."

"Yes, sir. What will the company be called?"

"...Call it Vought."

Vought International Media was established, registered, and put into initial operation in just three weeks, backed by Starr Group's immense capital.

And Wu Yanzu, as Vought Media's boss and sole contracted "artist," naturally did not hesitate to cooperate with all of the company's promotion.

"Mr. Starr, Vought's brand value rose by twelve percentage points following your heroic act yesterday."

"Our PR strategy has been highly successful. The Homelander IP is now the hottest..."

"Not an IP, dear." Wu Yanzu interrupted her.

Wearing his uniform, he slowly walked to the floor-to-ceiling window and looked down over New York.

"It's faith."

"...Yes, sir." The female assistant's breathing quickened slightly.

"What's on tonight's schedule?"

"The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, sir. Live nationwide."

"Very good." Wu Yanzu turned around, revealing a perfect smile. "It's time to show the American people just how down-to-earth their hero is."

That evening, before appearing on the talk show, Wu Yanzu was first invited to the Battle of New York Victims Fund charity dinner, held at Stark Tower. No, it should be called Avengers Tower now.

And there, unsurprisingly, he ran into Tony Stark.

"Hey, Pepper, look. The 'blond sweetheart' is here." Holding a martini, Tony Stark leaned lazily against the bar and spoke quietly to Pepper Potts beside him.

The alien menace brought by the Battle of New York still lingered, but since Wu Yanzu had stolen the spotlight, Tony Stark had not gone through that near-death trip through space.

Without a brush with death, there was no so-called post-traumatic stress disorder. He had not spent every day plagued by nightmares like in the original story, forced to seek security by wrapping himself in armor.

He was now... still the king of parties, billionaire, and playboy.

"That outfit..." Tony held a glass of champagne as he circled Wu Yanzu once.

"Seriously? You wore that to a dinner? Are you wearing... nothing underneath that uniform?"

Tony Stark's mouth was as foul as ever.

"People need a hero on call twenty-four hours a day, Tony." Wu Yanzu deliberately raised his voice, drawing the attention of nearby dinner guests. "Not an Avenger who only seeks justice for them... after they're dead."

A burst of applause rang out. Azu nodded and smiled in response.

"Ha!" Tony sneered. "Did Vought teach you that PR line? I heard you started a company? So what exactly is your new 'Vought' company... going to do? Print posters of you?"

"Just public relations." Wu Yanzu's smile was flawless. "You know, someone has to clean up the mess! Make sure heroes... look like heroes. Instead of... arrogant maniacs who keep making weapons that kill people?"

Tony Stark's smile froze.

"Weapons that kill people? Are you talking about me?"

"Just a metaphor, Tony. Relax." Wu Yanzu lightly patted his shoulder. "This place is great. Everyone is grateful to you. After all, if it weren't for your tower... those aliens wouldn't have had anywhere to land, right?"

"..."

Tony Stark found himself utterly speechless.

This Anthony Starr had a tongue more vicious than Tony's repulsors!

"Fuck..." Tony took a drink. "You really are a... boring bastard."

"Tony!" Captain America Steve Rogers walked over, dressed in a well-tailored suit with a slightly outdated style.

"Homelander." Steve took the initiative to offer his hand. "It's good to see you again. What you've been doing lately... is remarkable."

"I'm only learning from you, Captain." Wu Yanzu shook his hand with a humble expression. "You're the true hero."

Steve Rogers clearly loved hearing that.

"You're too modest. You... you've adapted very well."

"Alright, alright, America's Idol duo." Tony could not stand this damn atmosphere of positivity. "You two chat away. I'm going to find someone who can drink."