Courier Delivery and the Food God

The woman turned her head in an eerie manner and looked at Qin Fen, whose face was the picture of someone who had seen a ghost. She gave him a strange smile.

Qin Fen abruptly turned his head away in embarrassment, cursing inwardly. So there was a beauty here after all.

"If you've seen enough, help me open the package and get me the purple set." The woman said it outright without the slightest hint of shyness.

"Got it." Following her instructions, Qin Fen opened the parcel. When he looked inside, holy crap. What the hell was this? It was full of uniforms in all kinds of styles: flight attendant outfits, student outfits, cute outfits, nurse outfits, and even a sporty set with tiny blue shorts and a white tank top.

How badly did she lack outfits? She must not have had many growing up, Qin Fen muttered.

He found the purple flight attendant outfit. The moment he held it in his hands, his heartbeat sped up. Then he walked over to the bedroom door.

"Here. The purple one."

The woman turned around, held the door, and took the clothes from Qin Fen.

Qin Fen finally got a clear look at her from the front. She had an oval face, and her eyes were like pools of autumn water. To put it crudely, they were downright seductive. But her beauty was not the important part. Her lower abdomen was flat, with faint muscle definition that showed she exercised regularly. She even had the legendary abs. Yet that was not the important part either. Her waist was as slender as a water snake. And that still was not the important part.

Her upper body was at least four sizes above average. All right, that was the important part. Qin Fen took one glance and made a remarkably accurate judgment.

"Still haven't had enough?" The woman's lips curved upward.

"Mm, no, that's not it." Qin Fen could barely stand those eyes.

"If you've seen enough, turn around." After saying that, the woman turned around as well, leaving her back to Qin Fen. She pulled the door shut. From the corner of his eye, Qin Fen confirmed that she had changed. Then, using the sunlight on the floor, he watched her shadow sway as she wriggled into the outfit he had just brought her.

"I'll be going, then." Qin Fen was reaching his limit.

"Wait!"

"What?" Qin Fen jumped. Was this an invitation to have that legendary cup of coffee?

Just as the thought crossed his mind, something warm flew toward him and landed on his shoulder. Qin Fen turned his head to look. What the hell? What kind of game was this? Wasn't this what she had just taken off?

"It's still warm. Today's client is impatient and wants it freshly worn. Could you put it in the box and deliver it for me?" the woman's voice came from behind him.

What the hell was this? A client wanted this? I may not be well-read, but don't fool me. "Deliver it to the client?"

"Yeah. These outfits were all custom ordered by others. Today's set has more requirements. It can't be mailed, since that would waste time, so I need someone to deliver it. They're in a hurry," the woman said as if it were perfectly natural.

An outfit enthusiast? I'll do a three-hundred-and-sixty-degree backflip with a seven-hundred-and-twenty-degree twist and kneel before you. You city people really know how to play! Qin Fen looked as if he had stepped in shit. Someone actually wanted this? That client's tastes were truly unusual.

"I'm delivering it?" Qin Fen was speechless.

"Yeah, help me deliver it. I still have another set here, and I'll mail that one myself tomorrow. I can't leave right now." The woman spoke softly. "Oh, I don't even know your name. I see you whenever I come home, and I think you seem pretty decent. Unlike your manager. It's summer now, business is good, so I'm making a little extra. Once the season passes, I'll go back to running my restaurant."

What the hell? You city people really knew how to play. Qin Fen's face darkened. He had thought this woman was struggling, maybe some female streamer forced to sell this stuff. After all that, she turned out to be a wealthy beauty and a boss. Heavens, are you sure you're not messing with me?

"My name is Qin Fen."

"Ha, perfect. Be diligent and do a little more. I'll have you deliver things for me for a while from now on. How about I give you a hundred yuan tip every time?" The woman walked out.

She took a hundred-yuan bill from her bag.

"No need. It's not that big a deal, really." Qin Fen pushed her hand away. What a joke. He wanted to make money too, but not like this. Deep down, this young man still had some backbone. A poor man did not lose his ambition. One hundred yuan? Hmph, he did not want it.

"Then next time you come by, I'll treat you to coffee!" The woman smiled and sized him up. "My name is Sun Yating. You're not trying to play the long game and hook a big fish, are you?"

God's freaking uncle, there really was such a thing as coffee? Qin Fen walked out with the box in his arms, looking thoroughly depressed.

Watching Qin Fen enter the elevator, Sun Yating smiled. "He's quite an interesting guy." They had actually met long ago, and he had left an unforgettable impression on her. She could never forget their first encounter, but she had never found a chance to get close to him. So Sun Yating came up with a terrible idea: courier delivery. In truth, the client was her younger sister.

She was not normally so bold. She just wanted to tease Qin Fen whenever she saw him. That was why she had turned down Wang Ba and specifically named Qin Fen for the delivery. This fierce tiger of a girl now wore the expression of a wolf eyeing its prey.

The moment Qin Fen stepped out of the elevator, he regretted it. One hundred yuan could cover a month of cigarettes. No wonder Wang Ba hated him. This was a cushy job that paid money and came with benefits. I wonder what she'll wear next time?

Qin Fen composed himself, took out his phone, and checked the time. It was still early. He would make the delivery after work. Once again, bored out of his mind, he opened WeChat.

He tapped the Food God's profile picture, and a chat window naturally popped up.

"Isn't cooking easy? Aren't you the Food God? Can't you just wave your hand and make it happen? The ingredients are all ready-made. At worst, you'd waste a little divine power. Are you a pig?"

Qin Fen replied naturally. He had never expected the other party to actually respond, because both the question and the answer were complete nonsense. Divine power was nonsense, and the Queen Mother's birthday banquet was even more ridiculous. If someone told him some leader was throwing a lavish event, he might believe it a little. The Queen Mother? Her rank was so high it blinded his titanium-alloy dog eyes.

I'm a pig? The Food God stood in his immortal palace, somewhat dazed. He looked around, but saw no one. He pinched his fingers to calculate. What was going on? He could not calculate anything; it was all blank. Where had this person come from? How had this spiritual transmission connected? How did this person know he was in trouble? This fellow immortal's cultivation must be incredibly high. No wonder he spoke so fiercely. It was best not to argue with him.

Of course he could not calculate it. Qin Fen was in the mortal world, with immortals and mortals separated into two completely isolated realms. What the hell could he calculate? The laws of Heaven were no joke. The two realms were tightly divided by those laws. How could a mere invested deity calculate across them? Forget the Food God—even Yuanshi Tianzun would be helpless. And this was not spiritual transmission. It was WeChat on a phone.

Just as Qin Fen was about to turn off his phone and go to work, it suddenly vibrated. He picked it up and looked.

"Fellow Daoist, it is not that I do not want to conjure it, but that I cannot. This time, I must cook personally, or the flavor will be wrong. Magic cannot create delicious food; that requires experience and skill! If I mess this up, the Queen Mother will lose face, and I will be in terrible trouble as well."

"Then cook!"

"Fellow Daoist, I cannot manage it. The population has expanded terribly, and they all come with their families. I cannot handle it alone, and the preparations alone take a long time. There are servants, Daoist attendants, mounts, and huge numbers of lower servants eating in continuous shifts. My heavens, I'm done for. If I cook every dish one by one, I'll go insane."

"Aren't you an immortal? Can't you make a few clones?"

Qin Fen was deeply disdainful. Anyone who read webnovels knew about the Thirty-Six Heavenly Transformations and the Seventy-Two Earthly Transformations. Who was he trying to fool? Not enough manpower?

"I can make clones, but there are too many dishes and not enough time, especially when it comes to seasoning them. I cannot be disrespectful. This is the Queen Mother's birthday banquet."

Qin Fen was even more disdainful. "Seasoning? Don't you have MSG in your cafeteria? Chicken bouillon? Wang Shiyi Thirteen-Spice? If nothing else, prepare it in advance. Canned food and braised dishes would work too. Lao Gan Ma fermented black beans can be eaten directly. It's not as if they have to cook it and eat it immediately. Aren't you still preparing?"

"Fellow Daoist, what kind of spirit is MSG cultivated from? Where can I find one, and how do I catch it? Chicken essence is easier to find, but how do I make canned food? How can I trade for Fellow Daoist Wang Shiyi's immortal treasure, Thirteen-Spice? And which great immortal is Lao Gan Ma? This humble immortal begs for instruction! I am a latecomer seeking guidance from an exalted immortal. If I can survive this ordeal, I will have no way to repay you. Command me as you please—I will go through water and fire!"

"Psycho!" Qin Fen viciously exited WeChat.