Feng Tingfan, Feel What I Once Felt

"You're no good, and your mother's a slut too! A mistress who wrecked someone else's family!" The thought of having been used as a weapon by an illegitimate son made Yang Zhenyu tremble with rage. When he raised his hand to slap him, he did not hesitate in the slightest and nearly put all his strength into it.

Why should disgusting things like illegitimate sons get to enjoy the family's honor with their heads held high?

"What I hate most in this life are illegitimate sons."

"But among all illegitimate sons, you, Feng Tingfan, disgust me the most."

Feng Tingfan was stunned by the blow. He could not understand how things had escalated so quickly.

"Yang Zhenyu! Are you fucking crazy?! I'm a member of the Feng Household! Try laying a hand on me again! I'll fucking kill you!"

Yang Zhenyu was unconcerned. "I'm so scared. Go tell Uncle Feng, then. Let's see whether Uncle Feng will fall out with my dad over you." He gave a soft laugh. "You're just an illegitimate son. So what if you got hit? What are you yelling for?" His smile vanished as he casually pointed. "Beat him up."

The people around them received the order, and the circle surrounding Feng Tingfan gradually closed in. Looking at the group approaching him, fear finally appeared on his face.

"What are you trying to do?!"

"Aren't you afraid of getting expelled?!"

One of them said indifferently, "Young Master Yang said he'll take responsibility if anything happens. What are we afraid of?"

He was a member of the Feng Household. He was the Feng Household's second son.

Yang Zhenyu was one thing, but how dared those people wearing silver school badges do this?

What the hell were they?

That was what he thought, and it was what he said aloud. But soon, Feng Tingfan's hoarse protests and threats were drowned out by flying spit and raised fists.

Feng Tingfan did not even know how he had struggled free from the crowd. He fled quickly, but his steps were unsteady, and he staggered as he ran.

Then, through his hazy vision, he saw Bai Yunsheng walking toward him, carrying books and chatting cheerfully with someone beside him.

Two people, yet completely different fates.

Bai Yunsheng wore a clean school uniform, his posture upright as he walked. Even the smile on his face was poised and beautiful.

And he himself.

His hair was disheveled, and so were his clothes.

Having been beaten, he could not straighten his body properly and was hunched over.

The stark contrast between them greatly provoked Feng Tingfan. He quickened his pace, wanting to rush over and demand whether Bai Yunsheng had orchestrated all of this.

He needed an outlet.

But Feng Tingfan seemed to have forgotten.

Bai Yunsheng was no longer the Bai Yunsheng he used to be.

"Bai Yunsheng!" Feng Tingfan roared hoarsely.

Bai Yunsheng stopped and looked toward the voice. Naturally, he saw the bedraggled Feng Tingfan walking slowly toward him. Before Feng Tingfan could get close, the person beside Bai Yunsheng instinctively reached out and shoved him. "Who the hell are you?!"

Feng Tingfan was injured, and the force sent him stumbling back several steps. Then, unable to keep his balance, he pitched forward and dropped straight to his knees.

There was no emotion in Bai Yunsheng's eyes. Lowering his gaze to Feng Tingfan, who knelt on the ground with a stunned expression, he slowly asked, "Why are you kneeling on the ground?"

Feng Tingfan's face instantly turned red, but he quickly came back to his senses. "Was... was it you?"

Bai Yunsheng blinked, then his eyes returned to their half-lidded state. "What?"

Feng Tingfan said, "Was this all your doing? Why do so many people know now that I'm..."

"Feng Tingfan, I suddenly realized that you're quite interesting," Bai Yunsheng interrupted.

"You still don't understand?"

"Everyone was bound to find out about your identity eventually. If not now, then after my identity was made public."

"The point isn't when. The point is that you are indeed an illegitimate son, and your mother, Jiang Li, did indeed interfere in someone else's family."

Bai Yunsheng did not speak loudly, but it was enough for the spectators nearby to hear.

Feng Tingfan wanted to say something else when he heard footsteps behind him. Looking back, fear appeared on his face. He reached out and grabbed Bai Yunsheng's pant leg. "Bai Yunsheng, help me."

That group was getting closer and closer.

Seeing the scene before him, Yang Zhenyu teased, "What's this? Begging on your knees for forgiveness?"

Bai Yunsheng coldly withdrew his gaze from Feng Tingfan and glanced at Yang Zhenyu.

Yang Zhenyu felt somewhat uncomfortable under Bai Yunsheng's gaze. Recalling everything that had happened before, he said with regret, "Bai Yunsheng, I'm sorry about what happened before."

Bai Yunsheng ignored him. Just as he lifted his foot to leave, Feng Tingfan grabbed his pant leg again. "Bai Yunsheng, I'm your second brother. Help me. Please help me."

Bai Yunsheng frowned slightly. Looking down at Feng Tingfan's hand clutching his pant leg, impatience flickered in his eyes. "Yang Zhenyu."

Yang Zhenyu said, "Why haven't you taken him away yet?! He's gotten Young Master Bai's pants dirty! Are you all blind?"

The people following Yang Zhenyu immediately stepped forward and pried Feng Tingfan's hand away.

"Bai Yunsheng, you can't just leave like this!" Feng Tingfan panicked and struggled to climb up from the ground.

Bai Yunsheng gave no response to Feng Tingfan's words. They were like a gust of wind that brushed past his ear and dispersed. He continued walking forward without even looking back.

Feng Tingfan, feel it for yourself.

Feel everything I once felt.

That was true atonement.

He spent the day peacefully. That evening, because he had to go to Wu Shanye's home to practice piano, Bai Yunsheng could only stay at home, which meant he had no choice but to face certain things.

He had heard that Feng Tingfan had been beaten rather badly. He wondered how Jiang Li would badmouth him to Feng Yanshan.

Seeing that Bai Yunsheng had not gotten out of the car for a long time, Han Chen asked with some concern, "You don't look very happy."

Bai Yunsheng looked at the brightly lit villa in the distance and shook his head. "It's nothing. There are some things at home I need to deal with. It's a headache."

Han Chen fell silent for a few seconds before saying, "I've heard some things about you."

Bai Yunsheng asked, "Good or bad?"

Han Chen smiled. "Whether they're good or bad, I never get to know someone through other people's words."

"In my eyes, you're an excellent pianist."

Hearing Han Chen's words, Bai Yunsheng's ears reddened for once. He awkwardly raised a hand to touch his earlobe. "I haven't even entered any competitions yet. How could I be a pianist?"

Han Chen said, "You work hard. Talent and hard work together... Becoming a pianist is only a matter of time for you."

"Thank you, Senior Brother."

Han Chen raised his hand and rubbed Bai Yunsheng's head. "Get out. Isn't it late already? You still have school tomorrow."

Bai Yunsheng nodded, pushed open the car door, said good night, and got out.

The moment he entered, he heard Jiang Li's quiet sobbing. Bai Yunsheng instinctively frowned and headed toward the living room. The closer he got, the clearer the crying became. He could not avoid this matter; he had to resolve it properly.

He opened the living room door and immediately saw the two people sitting on the sofa. Jiang Li was crying pitifully in Feng Yanshan's arms, while Feng Yanshan was unusually patient as he comforted her.

Hearing the sound, both turned to look toward the door. Two people, two entirely different gazes.

Tears streaked Jiang Li's face, but her eyes were filled with venom.

Feng Yanshan's eyes, meanwhile, held displeasure.

Bai Yunsheng met both their gazes and calmly walked in.

Jiang Li broke free from Feng Yanshan's embrace, stood up, and pointed at Bai Yunsheng. "Was it you? Did you arrange for Tingfan to be bullied at school?!"

Bai Yunsheng told the truth. "I didn't know about it. Aside from last time, we haven't mentioned anything about our identities again."

"Father said he would reveal my identity after some time. All I had to do was wait. There was no need for me to do anything that would make Father unhappy."

When Feng Yanshan heard Bai Yunsheng say that, his expression improved slightly, though his words still carried disbelief. "Then how did this matter become such a huge uproar?"

Bai Yunsheng paused. When he spoke again, his voice was softer, and his gaze somewhat more desolate. "I don't have the ability or connections to make the entire school aware of it. Besides, people would find out about this sooner or later. I wasn't in such a rush."

Sure enough, Feng Yanshan's expression changed again.

Jiang Li immediately said, "If it wasn't you, who else could it have been?!"

Bai Yunsheng pretended to ponder for several seconds before continuing, "Maybe... maybe it was Mr. Meng. Other than him, I can't think of anyone who would do these things for me."

"Why don't I call and ask? We have to get to the bottom of this." As Bai Yunsheng spoke, he took out his phone.

Seeing this, Feng Yanshan said unhappily, "Why call at this hour? Look at what time it is."

Bai Yunsheng checked the time. "That's true. Then I'll ask tomorrow."

Feng Yanshan said, "Ask what? What is there to ask?!"

Bai Yunsheng paused, then looked at him with a slightly innocent gaze. "But Father, if I don't ask, how can I prove my innocence? Didn't someone say I did it?"

Feng Yanshan pushed Jiang Li, who had been leaning against him, away. His earlier gentleness was gone. "I've always told you to make Tingfan rein in his temper, rein it in! But you insisted on spoiling him! He's always had a good relationship with Yang Zhenyu. How did he suddenly stir up something like this?"

Jiang Li's expression had already turned ugly when she was pushed aside. After hearing Feng Yanshan's string of accusations, all color drained from her face. "Feng Yanshan! Your son was beaten into the hospital, and instead of standing up for him, you're here blaming Tingfan's temper! No matter how bad Tingfan's temper is, he's still your son! How can you... how can you be so indifferent?!"

Feng Yanshan abruptly stood up. "How do you expect me to handle it?! The Yang Household and I have always had business dealings. For pharmaceutical research, I still need the Yang Household to introduce me to people! How do you expect me to handle it?! Yang Zhenyu is the Yang Household's heir! He only got two slaps in front of me, and that was already giving me plenty of face! What more do you want?!"

"You eat my food, use my money, and you can't even manage a child properly, yet you still dare raise your voice at me!" Feng Yanshan said as he agitatedly slapped the sofa armrest. "I work myself to death every day! Then I have to come home and deal with this bullshit!"

Bai Yunsheng watched indifferently. The fierce arguing sounded like nothing more than ringing in his ears.

Sure enough, no matter when it was or what happened, as long as Meng Shangzhi was brought up, Feng Yanshan would unconditionally take his side.

How ironic. How laughable.

Bai Yunsheng waited quietly for a few more seconds. Seeing Feng Yanshan lower his voice a little, he stepped forward and said softly, "Father, don't be angry. It's bad for your health."

Feng Yanshan snorted coldly and said nothing more.

Jiang Li lowered her head and cried beside him.

Bai Yunsheng pressed his advantage. "Dad, are you planning to move into pharmaceuticals?"

Feng Yanshan glanced at Bai Yunsheng. "Why?"

Bai Yunsheng said, "I remember, isn't the Meng Household involved in that as well?"

Feng Yanshan's gaze shifted, and then he gave a quiet hum.

Bai Yunsheng said, "Why don't I mention it to Mr. Meng? Maybe he can make an introduction. Whoever he introduces would surely be better than the Yang Household's connections."

The deep crease between Feng Yanshan's brows finally smoothed out. "You'll bring it up?"

Bai Yunsheng nodded. "I can mention it casually and see how he reacts first?"

Feng Yanshan was silent for a few seconds, then raised his hand and patted Bai Yunsheng on the shoulder. "Good child." Then he turned and glared fiercely at Jiang Li. "Look at Yunsheng, then look at Tingfan!" Feng Yanshan did not finish what he wanted to say, but that hurt even more than saying it outright.

Bai Yunsheng said, "Father, let me help you upstairs so you can rest first."

Feng Yanshan nodded. Bai Yunsheng stood and affectionately supported Feng Yanshan by the wrist.

Jiang Li watched Bai Yunsheng's retreating back, her eyes filled with rage and malice. But she had not expected Bai Yunsheng to suddenly turn around and stare directly into her eyes. Then Jiang Li watched as Bai Yunsheng slowly curled his lips and smiled at her.

It was an ordinary, natural smile, even a beautiful one.

Yet Jiang Li felt a chill run through her. Bai Yunsheng was clearly smiling, but his eyes were utterly calm, without a hint of fluctuation, as though they had been painted on.

When Jiang Li came back to her senses, Bai Yunsheng had long since vanished from sight. She stood there in a daze for a long time before suddenly seeming to think of something. Her eyes lit up, and she hurriedly ran toward the study upstairs.

Feng Zhiyou had his own study. Under normal circumstances, no one but Feng Yanshan would disturb him, so Feng Zhiyou was somewhat surprised when Jiang Li entered.

"Mom, what is it?" As soon as Feng Zhiyou finished speaking, he coughed several times.

Jiang Li frowned and stepped forward with concern. "Why have you caught another cold?"

Feng Zhiyou smiled and set aside his work. "It's nothing. I just got caught in the rain last time."

Jiang Li said, "Caught in the rain? Don't you know what your health is like? And you still got caught in the rain."

Feng Zhiyou said, "Yes, I'll be more careful next time."

Jiang Li looked at the empty bowl on Feng Zhiyou's desk. "Have you been drinking the medicinal soup meant to strengthen your body?"

Feng Zhiyou said, "Yes, I've been drinking it."

Jiang Li said, "Then why hasn't it had any effect at all?"

Feng Zhiyou smiled bitterly. "Maybe I was born this way."

"Mom, what did you come to see me about today?"

Jiang Li looked troubled, her gaze darting away. After several seconds, she finally said, "Zhiyou, in your heart, Tingfan is your younger brother, right? And I'm your mother too, right?"

Feng Zhiyou paused. "Mom, why are you asking that?"

Jiang Li sat down on the single sofa, and tears immediately began to fall. "You've seen it too recently. Your father only has eyes for that biological younger brother of yours."

"Not only does he want to announce his identity, but Tingfan was beaten so badly today and your father did not even pursue the matter. Would he have acted like this before?" Jiang Li spoke as she cried. "I'm afraid that after some time, Tingfan and I won't have any place in the Feng Household."

Her sobbing continued. Jiang Li covered her face, but secretly watched Feng Zhiyou's expression.

Fortunately, Feng Zhiyou had always been expressionless and rarely showed emotion. Jiang Li could not read anything from his face.

After a long while, Feng Zhiyou finally said, "Mom, don't worry. In my heart, you will always be my mother, and Tingfan will always be my younger brother. No matter who appears, no matter who Dad favors, that won't change."

"Tingfan is the one who grew up with me, and you are the one who has always taken care of me."

"I can tell the difference."

"Blood relations don't mean anything."

"To me, Bai Yunsheng is just a stranger who appeared out of nowhere."

Jiang Li sniffled and wiped away her tears. "Zhiyou, hearing you say that puts me at ease. Can I ask you for something?"

Feng Zhiyou gave a hum.

"After your younger brother is discharged from the hospital, could you take Tingfan to school? It won't be for long, just one week. I only want others to see that you value Tingfan. Maybe then Tingfan will have an easier time at school."

Feng Zhiyou was silent for a few seconds, then nodded. "All right."

Only then did Jiang Li truly smile. "Zhiyou, thank you."

Feng Zhiyou said, "It's nothing."

Jiang Li stood up. "Then I won't disturb your work."

Feng Zhiyou gave a hum.