Chapter 23

Under the collective gaze of Qi Xiaoyuan, the Liu family's seven brothers, and passersby on their way to work who had stopped to sneak a look at the Immortal Pretty Boy, Second Potato, Xia Youyu, displayed his impeccable credentials as a high-end believer—

"Quick, quick, quick! Get to work while it's still cool in the morning!"

"The construction crew should go clear the weeds and level the ground over there first. Use the best materials to put up the shed. Remember to leave a little yard in front of it—this riverside soil is fertile, so we might even be able to grow crops."

"The transport team, carefully carry over the offering table and offerings! I handpicked all of those, and there's even my family's heirloom Ming-dynasty porcelain bowl! Don't you dare chip it—that's for offering spring water to Lord River God!"

"Everyone, put your backs into it! Let's finish by noon, and we'll settle your wages on the spot!"

The dozen or so burly workers answered in unison. Before the watching crowd, the River God's little riverside house and sacrificial altar were born.

Then it parachuted straight onto the trending searches.

[Holy shit! That Immortal Pretty Boy has set up camp by the river, aaaaaah!]

Author's note:

The construction crew sends hearts!

No need to worry about the shed. There's Water Gourd!

Shui Wuyuan: Rain God bless— you.

Xia Youyu: Don't worship the Rain God!!! You'll become poor—and unlucky!!!

He Qinglan: ...I don't have that many worldly desires... This shed isn't pretty enough.

Chapter 23

July 7 was another day for the entire nation to feast on gossip.

The moment office workers and homebody netizens opened their eyes and checked their phones, their attention was seized by trending topics such as #ImmortalPrettyBoyCampsByQinglanRiver#, #RiverGodAltar#, and #IsBuildingAShedByTheRiverAnIllegalConstruction#.

Clicking into the top topic about the Immortal Pretty Boy camping out, they saw more than a dozen brawny men putting up a small shed. The three-cubic-meter shed took only a little over an hour to go from a pile of wooden boards to a finished structure, while the little altar for offerings to the River God did not even need assembling—it only needed to be placed in a relatively level, clean spot.

The exquisite little altar was set by the river. Against the filthy, garbage-strewn sewage river that had run dry, the contrast became especially stark: the beautiful looked more beautiful, and the ugly looked uglier.

For no reason at all, it stirred a sense of melancholy in people's hearts.

[No way, no way, no way—does this Immortal Pretty Boy really plan to live by the river and keep picking up trash?!]

[It looks like he really does... Alright, my horizons were too narrow. I'd firmly believed the Immortal Pretty Boy was putting on a show and wasn't seriously picking up trash, but now it seems he's not only doing it with genuine feeling—he's even picked it up with flair and style!]

[He's even put up a shed now. Does this mean he won't leave unless the waters of the Qinglan River run clear?!]

[Why do I suddenly think the Immortal Pretty Boy is kind of amazing? And this strange sense of amazement feels like it isn't the first time I've had it? Who else have I sighed over like this before?]

[This pure, unpretentious feeling of staying true to himself feels familiar +1.

But what I want to know more right now is, who is that elite young man in glasses who brought over the construction crew? Why did he immediately start building a shed for our Immortal Pretty Boy, and even set up an offering altar for the River God?]

[Most importantly, isn't Glasses Guy afraid of drawing the Bicheng Urban Management Brigade by doing this? Does this little shed count as illegal riverside construction?!]

[The person above has a very valid concern! I just passed the entrance to Bicheng College of Arts and already saw Bicheng's number-one internet-famous urban management officers, the "Husky" squad, heading toward the river. They're expected to reach the battlefield in ten minutes!!]

The livestream viewers instantly grew excited. They sat up straight and rubbed their hands fiercely, ready to watch the grand spectacle of the "Huskies" battling the Immortal Pretty Boy.

Would the Immortal Pretty Boy's house be demolished and he be driven away, or would the Huskies scatter in retreat? Their instincts told them it would definitely be spectacular!

At this moment, the River God's mood was also rather complicated. Looking at Xia Youyu, who seemed pumped full of chicken blood and was staring at him with shining eyes as if begging for praise, the River God fell silent for half a minute before speaking.

"I can feel your sincerity and faith, but there's really no need for a temporary shed or anything like that."

The River God wore the expression of an immortal. "I told you, I don't have that many worldly desires."

Yet Xia Youyu seemed to hear only the praise, and became even more encouraged. Pulling out the Clear River Plan proposal for offerings to the god, which he had spent all night writing, he said,

"Although you do not have many demands, as your, ahem, River God's loyal believers, we below must think what the River God thinks and worry over what the River God worries over!"

"A mature believer must learn to take the initiative in making offerings and exerting himself for the River God. You don't need to say a word—just let me do it!"

He Qinglan was once again rendered speechless by that chuunibyou fervor: "..."

Only then did the utterly confused Qi Xiaoyuan shudder all over as he realized the identity of this bespectacled fellow. He was actually a River God believer just like him?!

In an instant, the number-one believer scrutinized this latecomer from head to toe with an exceedingly critical gaze, then reached the conclusion that this man had come with ill intentions—

This young man, who looked a few years older than him, was clearly no pure and kind soul. From the way he had spoken and acted just now, Qi Xiaoyuan could further determine that he was a pretty boy skilled at fawning and bootlicking! In ancient times, someone like him would surely have been a great villain worthy of being recorded in the annals of treacherous ministers. He had to come to the river more often and not let Lord River God be bewitched by this pretty boy!

Qi Xiaoyuan narrowed his long, narrow eyes and sneered inwardly. Wasn't there a ready-made problem right now?

"Indeed, loyal believers should think more for milord, but they should also do the right things and not cause trouble for milord.

"For example, I had also considered putting up a tent or building a house for milord here before. But this is riverside land. It belongs to the state and cannot be privately purchased. Building a shed here at will could get it forcibly demolished and result in a fine."

"And as the person in charge of the construction, this... brother in glasses might very well be taken away for some ideological education."

Qi Xiaoyuan looked at Xia Youyu, waiting to see how he would keep currying favor now.

Upon hearing this, Xia Youyu finally snapped out of some of his chicken-blooded fervor from the night before. He pushed up his glasses, annoyed with himself. How had he forgotten something so important the moment he got excited?!