Legendary Deliveryman's Vest

"Another job."

Cow-Horse looked toward the door.

The activity board was pushed open again, and that bony hand slowly reached inside.

"I'm curious. Is it really just a hand?"

Liu Zheng asked.

"No idea. Why don't you try pulling it in?"

Cow-Horse egged him on.

"Maybe after my brain turns inhuman too."

"Tch."

Cow-Horse scoffed and ignored him.

Liu Zheng walked over and picked up the new delivery order.

"Meal: One Fishman Family Bucket"

"Address: Room 606, Building 4, Green Laurel Garden Crazy City"

"Time limit: One hour"

After checking the map, he saw that at his current speed, it would take around half an hour.

It looked like a simple order, just like the first one.

"By the way, boss, how do I know when physical delivery is possible?"

With his current strength, he probably did not need to be as cautious as he had been at the start.

"There's no way to know. Even I can't be completely certain."

Cow-Horse shook its head.

"If you can talk, talk. If you can't, beat the shit out of them. In Bloodstained Restaurant, don't expect to live long enough to retire anyway."

It spoke lazily.

"Fine."

Liu Zheng shrugged.

After checking the meal and heading out, he went straight for Dai Lego.

From far away, he heard French Plane Tree's chainsaw-like singing.

"Aux armes, citoyens!"

"Formez vos bataillons!"

"Marchons, marchons!"

A tree singing La Marseillaise, and solo at that. It had a rather romantic flair.

Liu Zheng found it amusing, but his steps unconsciously fell into rhythm.

His thick goat hooves pounded the asphalt, their drumbeat-like footsteps echoing through the street.

French Plane Tree seemed to notice him as well, and its singing grew ever more impassioned.

"Qu'un sang impur!"

"Abreuve nos sillons!"

When he reached the vicinity of the black earth, Dai Lego waved all its branches and brought the performance to a perfect close.

"Excellent accompaniment. It made my roots spin. Love from France. HOLY SHIT!"

French Plane Tree turned toward Liu Zheng, its features twisting in fright.

"That last sentence wasn't French, was it?"

Liu Zheng said, narrowing his eyes.

"Of course you curse in English. No, how did you become like this?"

Dai Lego asked in shock.

"I ate Black Goat's Young sashimi and drank Hell Rock Cola, and then I ended up like this."

He shrugged his tentacles.

"Hahaha, serves you right. That's what you get for stealing my cola."

Dai Lego laughed loudly.

"Hey, we're business partners at least. Could you show a little sympathy?"

Liu Zheng said helplessly.

"I don't even have a heart, let alone sympathy. Did your brain disappear too?"

French Plane Tree rolled its eyes.

"Heh. Fine, then I'll keep that stuff and drink it myself."

He turned around and made as if to leave.

"Wait, did you bring lichens?"

Dai Lego asked excitedly.

"Lichens? What makes them worthy of being traded for a Paradise Island couples' vacation voucher?"

Liu Zheng snorted disdainfully.

"Seriously?"

Dai Lego's eyes widened.

It naturally knew the value of a Paradise Island couples' vacation voucher. What kind of supreme drink could be worth trading it for?

In an instant, more than a dozen legendary vintages flashed through its mind.

"Watch closely."

Liu Zheng opened the wine box, then immediately shut it.

Though it lasted only an instant, French Plane Tree still caught sight of the crimson blood wine.

"La vache! Quick, pour it into my mouth!"

Dai Lego screamed.

Green saliva seeped from its lips and dripped onto the black earth.

"Can you afford to trade for it?"

Liu Zheng asked with feigned contempt.

"Foolish human, my wealth is beyond your imagination."

Dai Lego replied disdainfully.

"Don't try to fob me off with useless junk. You know I only want things with practical value to me."

He emphasized.

"This..."

Dai Lego had a headache.

Though it was a local, it did not have many collectibles of this caliber, and even fewer that would suit Liu Zheng.

Did it have to take that thing out?

Dai Lego was reluctant. It had paid a huge price to acquire it, and its actual value was far greater than a bottle of wine.

But that was the Vlad III Limited Edition.

Missing a wine of that caliber would practically be a betrayal of its noble French bloodline.

"Putain, deal!"

French Plane Tree said viciously.

Then, a tree root burst from the ground, holding a storage box as it came before Liu Zheng.

Inside the storage box was a neatly folded yellow vest.

"Name: Legendary Deliveryman's Vest"

"Type: Item"

"Quality: Perfect"

"Effect 1: During deliveries, all attributes increase by 50."

"Effect 2: During deliveries, immunity to most sanity loss."

"Effect 3: During deliveries, attacks against most targets deal true damage."

"Can be taken out of the instance: No"

"Note: You can only choose one—bad reviews or staying alive."

It was insanely powerful.

Liu Zheng stared at the yellow vest with an expression even more ravenous than French Plane Tree's when it saw the red wine.

The effects were outrageously luxurious, and the numbers looked like they had been filled in with someone's foot.

This was not an item at all. It was straight-up a cheat.

"So? Is that enough to trade for your wine?"

Dai Lego said smugly.

"Enough. I'm just curious—how did you get this?"

He asked.

Anyone who could become a legendary deliveryman was certainly no weaker than Cow-Horse.

With the vest's buffs on top of that, beating French Plane Tree senseless should not have been a problem.

"Don't ask what you shouldn't."

Dai Lego said with obvious displeasure.

"We're fucking buddies. What's there that you can't tell me?"

Liu Zheng urged.

"Who the fuck is your buddy? He gave it to me as a Valentine's Day gift."

Dai Lego gave him a disgusted look, but still revealed the truth.

"A Valentine's Day gift?"

Liu Zheng looked at its rough bark with the expression of an old man staring at a phone on the subway.

"He thought so. To me, it was just a transaction."

Dai Lego snorted.

"A transaction? What kind of transaction?"

His puzzled gaze traveled over French Plane Tree's trunk before finally settling on its mouth.

"Oh."

Liu Zheng seemed to understand everything.

"Enough of that. Come on, drink."

Before Dai Lego could lose its temper, he immediately took out the Vlad III Limited Edition and poured it over the tree roots.

"Slower, slower! Do you even know how to taste wine?"

French Plane Tree said painfully, hurriedly extending more roots to catch the splashing wine.

A moment later, the entire bottle of red wine had been emptied.

"Quel pied!"

Dai Lego let out a satisfied moan, feeling as though the chloroplasts in every one of its cells were cheering.

"Pleasure doing business."

Liu Zheng put away the yellow vest and turned to leave.

He still had not completed his order and had no time to accompany French Plane Tree in getting drunk.

After walking more than ten meters, Liu Zheng took out the vest and put it on. It automatically changed into a style that fit him.

A warm current flowed into his body, and he felt strength filling every part of him.

Liu Zheng swung his tentacles forward. The four tentacles cut through the air with violent gusts, their force no less impressive than an industrial fan.

If I had a bucket of ice in summer, who wouldn't get blown into a trance?

He thought smugly.

Unfortunately, he could not maintain this form after returning to reality. Otherwise, he would either be sliced up for research or turned into sashimi.

Stopping his windmill routine, Liu Zheng broke into a mad sprint.

The scenery along the way rapidly vanished from his sight like game textures that had failed to load in time.

The human-bone cane kept jabbing against the ground, nearly striking sparks.

"Hm?"

Suddenly, he stopped.

Inside the building to his front right, Liu Zheng sensed a gaze filled with malice.

That malice was so intense that it stood out like a crane among chickens amid all the hidden stares.

He narrowed his eyes and walked toward the three-story building.

As he approached, the malice deepened even further.

Yet at the same time, that gaze seemed to be retreating.

"Is it... afraid?"

Liu Zheng froze for a moment, then his mouthparts stretched into an exaggerated grin, revealing a mouthful of sharp teeth.

He raised his tentacles and lashed the front door in a relentless barrage.

The thick rolling shutter continuously warped under the heavy blows, and the entire building seemed to tremble.

"Why the fuck are you peeking? Come out and fight me head-on if you've got the balls!"

Liu Zheng howled madly.

Soon, the rolling shutter collapsed with a thunderous crash under his one-sided beating.

The inside of the building was pitch-black, with only a flash of phosphorescence vanishing in an instant.

"Sanity loss immunity successful."

The system prompt flashed by.

"I thought you were terrifying. Turns out you're just like me—little punks who bully the weak and fear the strong."

He glanced around and spoke with contempt.

No one responded. Many of the prying gazes quietly vanished.

"Pah!"

He spat a mouthful of foul-smelling saliva onto the ground and continued toward the delivery address.