Chapter 22

[Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha (one hundred words omitted)]

[Holy shit, Ning Luo, your craziness scares me]

[Has everyone on your production team gone to see it??]

[I surrender, Dad]

[Let me see what my colleagues are doing

After watching: 6]

Shen Wenyu gave a light cough, trying to remind the two people in the room.

He no longer dared to look at the comments.

No one cared about him at all.

Ning Luo had never expected Wang Lin to play along. His eyes instantly lit up as he tested, "Ten years, life and death, separated by boundless vastness."

Wang Lin chuckled. "Five years, life and death, separated by boundless vastness."

Ning Luo slapped the sofa and sat up straight. "An inch of time is an inch of gold!"

Wang Lin said, "Three inches of time, one inch of Xin."

"Amazing!" Ning Luo clapped like a seal, his eyes full of admiration. "Director Wang, I never thought you possessed such talent. We truly are kindred spirits."

Wang Lin smacked him on the head. "Amazing my ass! You bear full responsibility for what I've become today!"

"Cough, cough!" Shen Wenyu coughed loudly, his face red from holding it in.

His gaze met Ning Luo's, who had been about to flop down with Wang Lin's force and scam him for sympathy.

Time seemed to slow countless times over. Shen Wenyu clearly saw those eyes widen as confusion, shock, disbelief, and finally terror flashed through them.

All the blood in Ning Luo's body seemed to flow backward.

His first reaction was to fling up a hoof and kick the straw sandal off his foot.

The straw sandal traced a perfect arc through the air. "Splat."

It hit Wang Lin squarely on the chin.

Wang Lin: "..."

"Director Wang!"

Ning Luo scrambled over and covered his chin, shouting, "Director Wang! If you're eating something, just eat it. Why are you throwing it around for fun? See? It hit you right on the chin!"

The grinding of Wang Lin's molars was clearly transmitted into the livestream viewers' ears.

[Hahahahahaha, I can't take it anymore, guys, I'm dying, hahahahahahahahahahahahaha]

[Does Ning Luo think we didn't see any of that? Hahahaha, help, why is this so funny!]

[I'm laughing so hard I've been put on vibrate mode, hahahaha]

[I laughed out a snot bubble that carried me away from Earth's gravity. What do you gain from this!]

[Fuck, I laughed until my jaw dislocated. Pausing the livestream, going to the hospital!]

[I'm laughing so hard I'm doing backflips, laughing until I can't take care of myself, laughing until I smash my neighbor's door in, hahahahaha]

Shen Wenyu was starting to forget what the word "ha" even looked like.

Wang Lin suddenly stood up and began looking for something.

Ning Luo shrank into the sofa and asked weakly, "Director Wang... what are you looking for?"

Wang Lin's blood rushed to his head. "Where's my dog-beating stick?!"

Ning Luo covered his mouth and quietly grabbed his shoe, ready to make a run for it at any moment.

Shen Wenyu hurriedly stopped him. "Don't do this. We're still livestreaming."

Wang Lin barely managed to calm down.

Oh, right. They were still livestreaming. The viewers were watching.

Shen Wenyu said, "I'll end the livestream first, then we'll give him a mixed doubles beating."

Ning Luo: ???

Fuck, he'd forgotten they were livestreaming!

[Oh my god, no, I'm about to laugh myself unconscious]

[So Ning Luo is this entertaining on set too? Hahahaha, this is too fun]

[Who said Ning Luo gets excluded? He's clearly the officially recognized group punching bag, hahahahahaha]

"Ning Luo." Shen Wenyu grabbed someone trying to sneak away, hauled him back like a chick, and smiled. "Come on, say hello to the viewers."

Ning Luo didn't want to. Right now, he just wanted to find somewhere empty, bury himself, and gently scatter a handful of ashes over himself.

A fake professional smile rose on his face. "Hi, hello, everyone in the livestream."

Inside, though, he was already a little boy on the verge of shattering.

[Well, what a cold-hearted person. Why did you drag me back... gomenasai, everyone had to see something unpleasant. Someone like me should just disappear into the beautiful 2D world. There are no humans there trying to defile this "love." Sumimasen...]

"..."

Wang Lin had become quite accepting, but even he wanted to strangle Ning Luo right now.

Ning Luo asked Shen Wenyu the question he cared about most. "Bro, when did you come in?"

Shen Wenyu said, "Oh, just now. I came in and immediately saw you saying Director Wang was throwing something around."

Ning Luo instantly sighed in relief, and the smile on his face became much more genuine.

[Hahahahaha, Brother Wenyu, you're lying]

[Shen Wenyu, you've changed. You know how to lie to children now]

[Yes, yes, say it just like that. Let Ning Luo think he escaped disaster, then when he gets home and goes online, he'll find his straw sandal trending, hahahaha]

[So evil, but I also want to see Ning Luo's reaction then, hahahaha]

[Guys, the related topic is already third on the trending list. Let's work harder so Ning Luo sees it the second he gets back!]

Ning Luo had no idea what the viewers were plotting. By the time Shen Wenyu handed him the selfie stick, the comments had completely returned to normal, without a single hint of anything amiss.

Ning Luo's relief lasted until he returned to the production hotel.

According to Shen Wenyu next door, that night's scream was comparable to a slaughterhouse.

It was accompanied by repeated thuds against the wall and Ning Luo's heart-wrenching howls.

[Fuck, I'm not living anymore! Whoever wants this life can have it! How can anyone not go crazy? I'm a person, not a watermelon, celery, pineapple, or Krabby Patty! But maybe I'm a monkey, hahaha! Like monkeys, become a monkey! Ha! Hey! Ho! Swinging in the primeval jungle! Throwing bananas! Roaring loudly! Roaring loudly!]

Shen Wenyu was next door under his blanket, nearly laughing himself insane, his whole body twitching with laughter.

Perhaps Ning Luo had exhausted himself from all the fussing. The room next door soon fell quiet.

Then Lu Tingzhou's phone screen lit up.

A specially followed account named "Pants.Crotch on Fire" had posted a new update.

[Pants.Crotch on Fire: It's okay, baby. You survived another day. That's already amazing.]

Attached image: [Let heaven know I refuse to surrender.jpg]

Ning Luo's previous heavy blow had suddenly gained this account quite a few followers, and comments quickly appeared below it.

[Yo, Teacher Pants.Crotch, why are you so emo today?]

[Pants.Crotch on Fire: You wouldn't understand. This is the loneliness of the adult world.]

[I understand. Being human is exhausting. Otherwise why would we be called humankind?]

[Why are you acting crazy instead of sleeping in the middle of the night? Your hairline pulled up is higher than my blood pressure]

[Pants.Crotch on Fire: Why sleep so much while alive? After death, one shall naturally sleep forever.]

[What, did you take too many Xiaoyao pills and turn into a bodhisattva saving all living beings?]

Ning Luo's already fragile heart shattered again. He wriggled around in bed like a maggot.

Wicked netizens! Wicked netizens!

He might look strong and carefree, but he would still die if a car hit him!

Ning Luo played the Great Compassion Mantra for himself and put it on repeat more than a dozen times before falling asleep with the light of Buddha all over his face.

Yes, that was it. Forgive everything before bed.

The Buddha was compassionate.

The next day, the moment he opened his eyes, he remembered yesterday's livestream and kicked his pillow into the air!

Forgive everything before bed, overturn the whole world upon waking!

All of you can go die!

When Taozi knocked on Ning Luo's door with today's fat-loss breakfast, she was met with a face stretched long. Startled, she asked, "What's wrong? Oh dear, why do you have dark circles too? Didn't sleep well last night?"

Ning Luo peeled an egg and let out a long sigh at the bald egg white. "I realized I often do stupid things, then get so stupid I cry."

Taozi said, "You only just realized that? Ah, no, I mean, ahem, it's fine. Just remember the lesson next time."

Under Ning Luo's resentful gaze, she forcibly corrected herself.

Ning Luo dejectedly ate eggs one after another. "But I can't bear to blame myself either. Living is hard enough already. If you can blame someone else, you should let yourself off the hook."

Taozi: "..."

She could tell.

Makeup took a little longer today because Ning Luo needed to cover his dark circles.

After filming for half the day, Taozi was afraid he would get low blood sugar again, so she bought him a hot roasted sweet potato. Ning Luo sat cross-legged on the ground, holding it as he ate until his mouth was shiny with oil, his eyes narrowing in contentment.

So sweet!

Shen Wenyu was talking to Wang Lin about taking leave.

"There are always more things going on at the end of the year. I have to attend a charity gala," he said. "Sun Shaoyi will definitely be going too."

Sun Shaoyi nodded beside him.

Wang Lin said, "I know. I arranged the schedule for you two ages ago, so there won't be any conflict. Remember to promote yourselves more in front of the cameras, stir up some CP buzz, and warm people up for our drama."

Sun Shaoyi made an "OK" gesture.

"Oh, right, doesn't Ning Luo have to go too?" Shen Wenyu turned to Ning Luo, who was focused on eating his roasted sweet potato.

Taozi knew his schedule and replied, "He does. I was just about to tell Brother Ning Luo."

Ning Luo was a little reluctant. He would rather lie dead in the hotel playing games than wear formal clothes in the freezing weather and go hungry. He asked listlessly, "What gala?"

Shen Wenyu said, "It's hosted by Laiyin, once a year. Ning Luo, haven't you gone before?"

Ning Luo searched his memories, and it seemed like he really had.

Wait... Laiyin?

[Ahhh, isn't this the time Ning Xibai accidentally drank an aphrodisiac and started going at it with Jin Rong in the bathroom, only to be discovered by Chen Chuan'ang, turning it into a three-way showdown that got secretly photographed?!]

[I remember Big Brother and Second Miss Chen, Chen Yan, will be there too. Holy shit, this is so exciting!]

Wang Lin and the others: Holy shit, that was exciting?!

Ning Luo sprang up from the ground, his eyes shining as brightly as searchlights. He eagerly raised his hand. "A gala, right? I'm going, I'm going, I'm going!"

[Your own games may be fun, but other people's gossip is even sweeter!]

Wang Lin made the decision on the spot. "We're taking a day off. I'm going too!"

A qualified gossip enthusiast would never miss a single juicy scoop!