Chapter 26

[Ding, Malice Points +3.67]

Watching the two walk away, Zero-Zero-Zero said, [People in the entertainment industry really are the best at passive-aggressive remarks. Everyone knows today's stunt was Pei Mingxuan trying to violate the spirit of the contract.]

Shi Jihan was stunned. [Zero-Zero-Zero, you grew a brain? I didn't even catch that.]

[Huh? I was reading the bullet comments.]

[...Never mind. Go play.]

The promotional photos came out quickly. Pei Mingxuan had a headscarf wrapped around his head and posed with a shovel over his shoulder, giving the camera a thumbs-up as though he were being threatened: If you're working in the fields, this is what you wear!

Shi Jihan marveled at what a fine cornfield-themed photoshoot it was.

Then he turned around and forwarded it to Zhou Jingcheng.

[Why Are You Still Awake?: Fine things should be shared.]

The other side immediately called him on video.

Before the video had even connected, a teasing voice came through. "President Shi is certainly generous with sharing, though not particularly considerate of my eyes."

The first thing Zhou Jingcheng saw was the enormous sunglasses on Shi Jihan's face. He paused, then looked at the sky on Shi Jihan's end. "You're wearing sunglasses in the middle of the night? And using a flashlight to light the road?"

Who taught you to be this creative?

Shi Jihan pushed up his sunglasses and said solemnly, "I'm too shy and introverted. I don't dare show my whole face on camera."

Zhou Jingcheng said, "Then you really should cover it up."

Secretary Sun, who had been listening to their nonsense, quietly interrupted, "Boss, you need to sign these."

Several folders were pushed into the frame. Only then did Shi Jihan realize, "You're still working overtime at the office?"

"Thanks to President Shi, every brand Pei Mingxuan endorsed is cutting ties at lightning speed. Some would rather pay damages than keep him." Though he said that, Zhou Jingcheng clearly did not care. Without even looking, he swiftly signed each document, remarkably decisive.

Pei Mingxuan wanted to take the resources Zhou Jingcheng had given him and leave?

Zhou Jingcheng smiled. That was a little too wishful.

Shi Jihan said, "Then hurry up and sign them. Go home and sleep when you're done."

Zhou Jingcheng's signing hand paused. He looked into the camera, and the smile at the corner of his lips deepened almost imperceptibly. "You aren't worried about me, are you?"

"What are you thinking?" Shi Jihan asked, baffled. "I'm afraid you won't be able to get up tomorrow morning to walk Pizza."

The faint smile that had just surfaced in Zhou Jingcheng's eyes froze at his lips. After a long while, he curled his lips and said lightly, "...I really ought to thank you on Pizza's behalf for your concern."

"No need to be so polite! That's it for now, bye."

"Wait," Zhou Jingcheng stopped him and asked, "Where are you sleeping tonight?"

Shi Jihan did not understand why he was suddenly asking. "Me? I had the director arrange some random room."

Zhou Jingcheng frowned. "Then you need to stay away from Pei Mingxuan."

Seeing that Shi Jihan still did not understand, he reminded him, "Pei Mingxuan likes cute boys like you."

Shi Jihan sucked in a breath and immediately clutched his collar to protect his virtue. "Sleep? I'm carrying the plane home overnight!"

The call ended.

Secretary Sun said, "Even if Pei Mingxuan likes him, he probably won't want to see Young Master Shi again."

Zhou Jingcheng lowered his head and continued signing. "Better safe than sorry."

-

Shi Jihan really did leave the moment he said he would.

He was far too afraid that the tight floral cotton jacket would latch onto him. After all, he was so handsome.

[There's nothing I can do. People as good-looking as me have this kind of trouble.] Shi Jihan leaned against the window, gazing at the night outside the plane and pitying himself with a melancholy sigh.

Zero-Zero-Zero asked for his opinion. [Host, do you need me to wake you up with a splash? Boiling water or liquid nitrogen?]

Shi Jihan made an OK sign with his fingers, breathed out, and quickly flicked the marinated egg away!

Though he had left, he had still left Pei Mingxuan a little gift. He hoped Pei Mingxuan would not like it.

That meant another source of extra income for him.

That entire night, some people slept soundly, while others tossed and turned without sleep.

And some people did not sleep simply because they were too excited.

The moment the reality show aired, the internet exploded.

The first site to be flooded was Bilibili. The segment of Pei Mingxuan dancing in the oversized floral jacket was edited by a shameless uploader into a brainwashing meme video. Every line of "Y-you-you-you want to dance?" came with endless replays of him twisting his waist and thrusting his hips.

Netizens commented enthusiastically: [Wok, there's a bedsheet performing an exorcism dance!]

[Thank you, I've un-stanned. Don't tag me, don't disturb me, peace and quiet in these passing years. 🙏]

[No worldly desires.jpg]

[Why does this video have more views than his actual stage performances?]

At the same time, Shi Jihan's fourth victim appeared on the trending searches.

#Pei Mingxuan's Most Hardcore Stage#

The directors and the liaison departments of his endorsement brands saw the trend and immediately turned to his competitors. Some had been discussing collaborations with Pei Mingxuan's assistant Kian one second, then withdrew their messages the next.

[Sorry, dear, I clicked the wrong chat window. This wasn't for you. 🌹]

Kian was furious and went to find Pei Mingxuan before dawn the next day.

But he found Pei Mingxuan in the middle of a complete breakdown.

"Why is there a floral jacket spread over the kang bed? It was clearly Blooming Prosperity yesterday!"

The owner of the guesthouse explained, "The fabric is smooth. Mr. Shi left quite a lot for us."

Pei Mingxuan flung open the window and pointed outside. "Then why is every goose in the yard—every single one!—wearing these floral jackets?"

The old man smiled shyly. "Mr. Shi gave us so many. There were simply too many."

Pei Mingxuan's vision went dark. His PTSD had been triggered.

[Ding, Malice Points +2.45]

[Ding, Malice Points +1.78]

Shi Jihan listened to the heavenly sounds with satisfaction for a while, then immediately asked Zero-Zero-Zero, who had just returned from the Unified Realm, [How did it go? What did the Main System say? Is it going to deduct money?]

Zero-Zero-Zero took out the second penalty notice, looking miserable. [The Main System said that it had never seen anyone complete every mission objective while making the main plot collapse like this.]

[The way it put that, aren't we just broadening its horizons?]

Shi Jihan met Zero-Zero-Zero's resentful black-bean eyes and immediately covered his mouth. [I'll stop talking. Hurry up and tell me.]

[It said it's extremely disappointed in us, that this is completely unacceptable, and that we must be punished severely! Money deductions and performance deductions!] Zero-Zero-Zero deliberately added "us" to show how united he and his host were.

Shi Jihan slowly, slowly slid off the sofa onto the carpet.

Like a Three-Body person whose water had been drained away.

[But!]

[It has decided to give us one last chance!]

[Ding, mission issued: Final Death Throes]

[Forge a divorce declaration stating that the relationship has broken down, and deliver it to Shi Bochuan. Reward: none.]

[Penalty for mission failure: unknown]

[Mission countdown: 03:00]

Zero-Zero-Zero shook Shi Jihan. [Host, pull yourself together!]

[This is the most crucial mission point. If this fails, the Main System will activate the automatic correction mechanism!]

Shi Jihan struggled to get up and pull himself together. [No. Once money enters my pocket, it can't decrease. I'll write it right now!]

But he did not dare do it himself, orz.

Shi Jihan held the sheet of paper, unable to bring himself to write a single word.

After thinking it over, he set his sights on someone else.

He opened his chat with Zhou Jingcheng.

[Why Are You Still Awake?: Xiao Zhou, the time has come for you to repay my kindness.]

The other side only replied after a while.

[z: What do you need?]

[Why Are You Still Awake?: Write me a divorce declaration. It has to be emotionally intense, heartbreakingly tragic, the kind that makes all eternity mourn.]

[z: ?]

[z: I'm not even married. Why would I write a divorce declaration?]

[z: Not writing it. It's bad luck.]

Seeing the mission countdown ticking away, Shi Jihan got so anxious that he directly sent a voice message, loudly demanding, "You're definitely getting married within the next ten years anyway, so can't you just pretend you're already married?"

Zhou Jingcheng replied with an even louder question. "I'm definitely going to die within a hundred years, so can't you just pretend I'm already dead?"

Chapter 26

Zhou Jingcheng's words were shocking and forceful, leaving Shi Jihan completely dumbfounded.

When he considered it carefully, it made sense.

So he quickly replied to Zhou Jingcheng, "Okay, you're already dead. It's fine."

"Now imitate your partner and write a widowhood declaration. It has to be emotionally intense, heartbreakingly tragic, the kind that makes all eternity mourn."

Zhou Jingcheng sent him several question marks, then added another message.

[z: Shi Jihan, be a decent human being.]

Shi Jihan pointed out, [You called me President Shi last night. What a fickle man.]

[z: Okay, President Shi.]

[z: Daily question: Has President Shi been heartbreakingly shattered today? Has he undergone mitosis? Split in half?]

[Why Are You Still Awake?: ?]

[Why Are You Still Awake?: Don't make me slap you.]

[z: [Shrug]]

Shi Jihan stared at the emoji and detected Zhou Jingcheng's uniquely passive-aggressive tone. He dropped a heavy bomb.

[Why Are You Still Awake?: Zhou Jingcheng, you wouldn't want to trend again, would you? [Evil Cow Cat Smile]]

[z: ...]

[z: Send me the requirements.]

Very good. Wouldn't it have been better if he had listened so obediently from the start?

Shi Jihan happily sent them over, then thought about it and still felt uneasy. [No, I need to watch you write it so I can correct you in time.]

[I'll go to your office and find you right now!]

Before Zhou Jingcheng even had time to reply, the other party had already energetically sent, "Heading out, see you," and completely stopped replying.

"A divorce declaration..."

Zhou Jingcheng pondered. The only married people around that guy were Shi Bochuan and his partner, right? First he had Zhou Jingcheng's younger brother inspect their love, and now he wanted a divorce declaration. What exactly was he up to?

And besides, how was one supposed to write this thing?

Zhou Jingcheng had a headache.

Just then, Secretary Sun came in with documents. Zhou Jingcheng checked them, signed after confirming there were no issues, but did not immediately dismiss Secretary Sun. Instead, he stared at him for a long time. Secretary Sun's scalp tingled under that gaze, and he wondered whether Zhou Jingcheng had discovered that he had zoomed an Excel sheet to 500% that morning and scrolled his mouse to look busy while actually doing nothing.

Just as he was nervously about to confess first, Zhou Jingcheng asked, "Have you ever been divorced? Have you ever written divorce documents?"