Tea and stories

After sighing, Ding Songyan picked up his teacup, took a slow sip, and fell silent.

Twelfth Madam Luo, sitting on the swing, waited for a long time and couldn't help but ask:

"Then what?"

Ding Songyan looked up with slight surprise:

"What I just said was to explain why it wasn't obvious, not the beginning of the story."

He doesn't like to share his past or his feelings.

"Oh..." Twelfth Madam Luo was slightly disappointed.

Ding Songyan was lost in thought for a few more moments, then gave a self-deprecating laugh:

"Actually, that's not my past, it's just a story. If you want to hear it, I can tell you, but you'll find that it doesn't match Ding Songyan Second Brother Ding's real experiences."

Twelfth Madam Luo asked, slightly taken aback:

Why do you want to talk about it again?

"When a story has been buried in your heart for too long, there will always be a time when you want to tell it. You and I met by chance, and we may never meet again in the future, so it's the perfect time to tell and listen to each other," Ding Songyan said in a low and gentle voice.

The knot in my heart had already faded; speaking it out is like a ritual to completely untie it.

Luo Mingyin remained silent for a moment, then left the swing and sat down opposite the stone table.

Ding Songyan placed a teacup in her cup and poured in light yellow-green tea.

Twelfth Madam Luo picked up her teacup, took a small sip, and turned her gaze to Ding Songyan.

Ding Songyan looked at the few tea leaves bobbing up and down, and chuckled:

"At that time, I had not yet learned martial arts, but I was very proud of myself and arrogant, thinking that I would definitely achieve great things in the future."

"Later, I met a girl of unparalleled beauty, one who made many men feel inferior and dare not approach her. But I didn't feel unworthy at all; even then..."

Ding Songyan thought for a moment and gave an example that Twelfth Madam Luo could easily understand:

"Even if the Greatest Beauty in the World Feng Yining in front of me, I would still dare to pursue her like a gentleman."

Twelfth Madam Luo's mouth opened slightly, and after a few breaths she burst into laughter:

"Indeed, I was young and impetuous."

Ding Songyan brought the teacup to his lips and looked at Twelfth Madam, saying:

"I do have some talent when it comes to pursuing a beautiful woman, and I eventually won her heart."

"After that, after experiencing many things in life, I realized that I was really ignorant and arrogant in the past. My so-called talent only brought me setbacks and failures one after another. Not to mention great achievements, I couldn't even touch the achievements that I used to think were insignificant."

"During my most destitute year, I was supported entirely by that girl's Silver Coins. When my family members fell ill or suffered misfortune, she was the one who ran around handling everything. I vowed then and there to give her the best future."

Twelfth Madam Luo listened intently, her voice unconsciously softening:

"Then why did you break up?"

"During that time, the repeated setbacks shattered my Dao Heart, gradually turning me from arrogant to insecure, and my mind became extremely sensitive." Ding Songyan revealed a self-deprecating expression. "And she was such a beautiful girl, there were always people admiring her around her. In order to earn Silver Coins, she couldn't possibly stay at home and not go out. I started to be suspicious, and I would always feel jealous because of some suspicions, and then we would argue, not speak to each other, and treat each other coldly. When I found out that it was indeed a misunderstanding, I would try to please her and mend the rift."

"At first, this actually made our relationship better, but I was like I had Heart Demon. Even though I knew it was wrong, I couldn't help but be suspicious. We argued, became distant, apologized, and made up again and again. In the end, we were both exhausted, and our feelings faded and we grew tired."

"The day I emerged from the mire and achieved some success, she suggested breaking up, and I agreed."

"Continuing like this would be torture, for her and for me. It's like the question you asked before: we want to get closer, yet we resist each other."

"She didn't want anything from me; she left alone and went back to her hometown."

Twelfth Madam Luo quietly contemplated the feelings and scenes Ding Songyan had described for a while, then spoke softly with a deep gaze:

"This is the work of Heart Demon."

"Your heart has a flaw, and you've been exploited by your Heart Demon."

"Twelfth Madam, there's no need to comfort me." Ding Songyan shook his head and smiled. "I achieved a lot later, and my Dao Heart was gradually pieced back together. Looking back, I realized how terribly wrong I was back then. It had nothing to do with Heart Demon; it was all my own mistakes."

Twelfth Madam Luo slowly shook her head:

"I'm not trying to excuse you. Your Heart Demon are two sides of the same coin. Well, let me put it another way: human desires. When they go too far, they become demons; when they are too little, they become inhuman. What we need to do is to be impartial and Hold Fast to the Mean."

"When your heart is broken, the jealousy in your desires deviates from the right path and exceeds the limit, thus becoming Heart Demon."

"Heart Demon can be overcome and eliminated, but they can never be truly eradicated. Their Seed is human desire. Hence, the sage Master Zuo said, 'Examine yourself three times a day.'"

At this point, Twelfth Madam Luo sighed and smiled:

I thought you would refuse to admit your mistake.

Ding Songyan smiled wryly:

"For a time, in the dead of night, when I woke up and thought about the past, I wanted to sit up and slap myself, yelling, 'You deserve to die!'"

Twelfth Madam Luo was initially in low spirits, almost burst out laughing. She looked at Ding Songyan, hesitated for a moment, and said:

"Didn't you try going to see that girl again?"

Ding Songyan was silent for a moment, then smiled and said:

"Time has passed. Once, when I returned to my hometown, a friend who knew us both told me that she had found a good match and had recently gotten married."

Twelfth Madam Luo remained silent for a long time, then hesitantly asked:

"How did you feel at that time?"

"It's been too long, I don't remember," Ding Songyan, recalling. "I probably didn't have any deep feelings, since we've been apart for so long. I only remember that the sky was very blue that day, and the cicadas were chirping loudly."

Twelfth Madam Luo gave Ding Songyan a deep look, then suddenly asked:

"Wasn't it this young lady who said I shouldn't have answered your question?"

"Yes." Ding Songyan smiled slightly, but his gaze remained fixed on the surface of the tea.

Twelfth Madam Luo took a sip of tea, unsure whether she was asking herself or Ding Songyan:

"So, did you let it go later?"

Ding Songyan finished his tea, poured himself another cup, and said with a wry smile:

"For a time, I tried to find someone else, but whenever we were about to truly connect, I couldn't help but back down, run away, and give up. I don't know why I did that, so I simply stopped searching and started indulging in a life of pleasure and debauchery."

"And then?" Twelfth Madam Luo sensed the unfinished meaning.

Ding Songyan picked up his teacup, but forgot to take a sip; his gaze seemed to be fixed on a distant place.

"Later, I met two outstanding girls. I met one when I was in trouble, and I had no time to think about anything else. When my situation improved, the two of them were very far apart and could only correspond by letter. They were good friends. At first, I was moved by the romance and sincerity in her letters, but after all, they were far away, and the ripples quickly subsided."

"There's another girl, well, if nothing unexpected had happened, we should have naturally gotten together by now."

"Your Senior Sister?" Twelfth Madam Luo's interest in hearing gossip was piqued.

Ding Songyan glanced at Twelfth Madam Luo:

"I've already said, this is just a story; don't apply it to the present."

Twelfth Madam Luo changed the question:

"So, you've let go?"

"How could I truly let go of such an important part of my life? I can only say that I've resolved my inner conflicts, stopped dwelling on the past, and am willing to embrace new possibilities and a new future," Ding Songyan said truthfully.

"There is no such thing as true letting go, only whether or not the knot in one's heart is untied..." Twelfth Madam Luo repeated the meaning behind Ding Songyan's words.

She pondered for a long time, then looked at Ding Songyan and said somewhat shyly:

"Actually, I'm quite curious about how you resolved your inner conflict."

"Everyone's circumstances are different; you can't imitate them," Ding Songyan chuckled. "When I first met that girl, I was in a state of fear, despair, unease, and uncertainty about the future. She came from the darkness like Zhuguang, illuminating my path and bringing hope."

"This made me feel especially close to her, and I was willing to share my life experiences with her. We practiced martial arts together every day, strolled around together, played together, and went on adventures together. We would bicker sometimes. In the eyes of many people, we were already considered a couple. Until an elder asked me what I thought of that girl, I instinctively chose to back down and run away."

"But this also woke me up. If I don't want to ruin someone else's reputation and don't intend to marry her in the future, it's best to keep my distance."

"I carefully recalled every moment I spent with that girl and realized I didn't want to give up. So I told myself, 'Give it a try, try to resolve this knot in my heart.'"

"She was a very warm and cheerful girl who gradually illuminated my heart, which had become somewhat dark and tainted with demons. I don't know when it started, but I forgot my inner turmoil."

Twelfth Madam Luo sighed with heartfelt emotion:

"Very nice.

"Such an experience is truly something that others cannot imitate."

She asked with concern:

"You two were separated by accident, is it possible for you to get back together in the future?"

Ding Songyan smiled slightly:

"I'll try my best; she seems to be getting the hang of it too."

At this point, Ding Songyan let out a sigh of relief:

"The problem is, my enemy can't stand to see me doing well, and I can't beat her. If I get together with that girl, it will bring her to her death."

Twelfth Madam Luo paused for a few moments, her expression unconsciously turning serious, and asked solemnly:

"Then will you give up?"

"Why give up?" Ding Songyan asked in surprise.

How could I give up trying to seduce my Senior Sister just because of Demoness Ji's threat?

That's the mindset of the weak!

Twelfth Madam Luo asked blankly:

"Didn't you say your enemy was very powerful?"

"Just because she's powerful doesn't mean I have to give up!" Ding Songyan said with a laugh. "I'll find an opportunity, a suitable occasion, a place where that enemy can't get close, and be honest with my senior Senior Sister, uh, that girl. If she has feelings for me, I'll ask her to wait for me, to wait until I attain Celestial Person, and then I'll marry her openly and honorably. Until then, I'll keep my distance, or do it secretly."

"In short, don't give up, and don't let her misunderstand."

Twelfth Madam Luo seemed to be seeing Ding Songyan for the first time, staring at him blankly for a long while before sighing and smiling:

"Even though you have a thousand faults, your tenacity and ruthlessness are still commendable."

Ding Songyan poured Twelfth Madam Luo a cup of tea and said with a smile:

"Thank you for the compliment, Twelfth Madam."

"My story is finished, it's your turn."

"Me, I want to speak too?" Twelfth Madam Luo was somewhat taken aback.

"You can't just listen to my story for free; you have to exchange it for your own," Ding Songyan said with a click of his tongue.

Before Twelfth Madam Luo could respond, he shook his head and smiled:

"Just kidding, Twelfth Madam, you can tell me if you want, or it doesn't matter if you don't. I just feel that if a story has been buried in your heart for too long, there will always be a time when you want to tell it. And since we met by chance and may never see each other again, it's just right for you to tell and hear it."

He repeated his earlier words.

Twelfth Madam Luo silently drank the tea in her cup. After a while, she sighed softly.

My story is very simple.