The self-cultivation of a Magical Girl

Su Xiaoxiao was still enthusiastically gesturing with the little golden lace umbrella on the lawn, chanting the names of various moves.

Su Bai glanced down at his watch; the hands had already passed the 2 a. m. mark.

"That's enough. If we don't go back now, nobody's going to get up for school tomorrow."

Su Bai pushed the electric scooter back onto the road, interrupting his sister's self-entertainment.

After finishing the testing and getting back to the Xingfuli Apartment, it was already 3 a. m.

Su Xiaoxiao was so exhausted that she didn't even have the strength to hang up her school uniform jacket. She collapsed onto the hard bed in her bedroom, and her even breathing could be heard as soon as her head hit the pillow.

The house was so quiet that only the ticking of the living room clock could be heard.

Xia Ning, however, couldn't fall asleep no matter what.

She was wearing Su Xiaoxiao's oversized old T-shirt with faded anime patterns, the hem of which hung down to just above her knees.

The room was stuffy and the air was filled with the musty smell that is unique to rainy days.

Xia Ning tiptoed out of the bedroom and pushed open the glass sliding door connecting the living room to the balcony.

The slide rail made a slight friction sound.

The night wind was so damp you could wring water out of it; it blew in through the security bars on the balcony, making your skin feel cold.

Su Bai was leaning against a rusty iron railing, holding a steaming cup of cheap instant coffee.

The street outside the balcony was pitch black, with only a few faulty streetlights casting a faint glow in the rain.

Su Bai heard footsteps behind him and turned his head to look.

"Why aren't you sleeping? What are you doing wandering around here?"

Su Bai's voice was low, with a hint of hoarseness from staying up all night.

Xia Ning walked to the railing and stood there, placing her hands on the cold iron bars, keeping her head down and saying nothing.

Su Bai casually pushed the coffee cup he was holding next to Xia Ning.

The warm ceramic cup pressed against Xia Ning's palm, dispelling the goosebumps that had risen on her arms in the night breeze.

Xia Ning held the cup, and the sweet aroma wafting from the rim of the cup filled her nostrils—it was the smell of a two-yuan pack of three-in-one sweet water.

"Brother Su Bai, why aren't you asleep yet?"

Xia Ning asked softly, her fingers gently stroking the inside of the cup.

"Go to sleep after you finish this drink."

Su Bai glanced at the empty alley downstairs and gave a casual reply.

"I earned thirty yuan in cleaning fees tonight. After accounting for the charging losses of the electric scooter, I barely broke even."

"I won't be able to close my eyes in peace until I've settled all the accounts."

Xia Ning lowered her head, her gaze fixed on her toes.

She wore faded plastic sandals, the insteps of her feet turning bluish-white from the night breeze.

"Brother Su Bai, am I particularly useless?"

Xia Ning's voice was dry, and the words were squeezed out of her throat with difficulty.

Su Bai raised an eyebrow but didn't respond.

Xia Ning kept her head down and continued muttering to herself, her emotions gradually spilling out with each word.

"When I was facing those two monsters in the convenience store, my legs were actually shaking the whole time, shaking uncontrollably."

"I've already transformed many times before."

"I was clearly the first person to fight alongside Lady Ziwei."

"But when I saw those two beasts charging at me, my mind went completely blank, and I couldn't even maintain a basic defensive shield."

Xia Ning bit her lower lip, her eyes reddening slightly in the night.

"If Lady Ziwei hadn't arrived in time, Xiaoxiao and I would be two rotten lumps on the ground right now."

"And Xiaoxiao..."

Xia Ning sniffed, her voice growing softer and softer.

"She only just figured out how to condense Star Core today, and she's already created that kind of unreasonable defensive weapon."

"I practiced water arrows for months, and I still couldn't break her little parasol."

"I can't even avoid the rebounding water."

Xia Ning gripped the coffee cup in her hand even tighter.

The liquid in the glass rippled slightly, reflecting her disheveled figure.

"Lady Ziwei is invincible; she is a goddess who saves everyone."

"Xiaoxiao is a genius, one in a million. She can easily cross the level barrier with just a wish."

And what about me?

Xia Ning gave a self-deprecating laugh, tears streaming down her cheeks and dripping onto the cement floor.

"I'm stuck in the Germination Stage, caught between a rock and a hard place. I'm useless in combat, and my support abilities are limited to providing only weak and ineffective attacks."

"What am I, in the Star Magical Girls group, anyway?"

"He's nothing but a ridiculous clown."

She buried her face in the wide neckline of her T-shirt, her shoulders trembling slightly with each sob.

The frustration and fear that had been building up for most of the night finally burst forth at this moment.

Su Bai stood to the side, holding the empty stirring stick in his hand, and listened quietly to her long string of nonsense.

He didn't reply immediately, but instead looked her up and down with an expression as if she were an idiot.

Xia Ning cried for a while, sniffling, and looked up, only to meet Su Bai's disgusted face.

Why... why are you looking at me like that?

Xia Ning wiped away her tears, feeling both embarrassed and angry.

Su Bai tossed the plastic stirring stick into the trash can in the corner of the balcony with a soft thud.

"Xia Ning, have you been reading too many online novels? Has it damaged your brain?"

Su Bai spoke without any politeness.

"I... I'm telling the truth!"

Xia Ning argued, "In the face of an absolute difference in combat power, mediocrity is the original sin!"

Su Bai leaned against the railing, arms crossed, and gave a cold laugh.

"Mediocrity is the original sin? Who taught you that? Those politicians in the Monster Hunting Bureau who can't pay their salaries?"

"Some members of the Monster Hunting Bureau refuse to back down even when their defenses are completely crumbling, and they will fight to the bitter end even when their resources are exhausted."

"Those idiots in the Monster Hunting Bureau are probably just like that."

Su Bai's eyes held undisguised sarcasm.

"Sending a bunch of teenagers to the front lines for the sake of some vague sense of face and so-called lofty righteousness."

"They died in the mud, and all they received was a thin certificate of pension, not even enough to buy a burial plot."

"You think that's something great, right?"

Xia Ning was speechless after Su Bai's words. She opened her mouth, but didn't know how to refute him.

Su Bai simply laughed, the sound of which seemed particularly jarring in the silent night wind.

"Xia Ning, get your identity straight."

"You're just a Magical Girl, a temporary worker who only does monster-fighting on the side. Why are you worrying so much?"

Su Bai stretched out a finger and poked Xia Ning's forehead hard, making her take half a step back.

"Does the Team pay you a fixed salary? Do they contribute to your social insurance and housing fund?"

"Every month, the Abyssal Core dropped by monsters, after being converted into money, still mostly end up in the organization's public account, don't they?"

"You haven't been paid the wages to save your life, so what are you pretending to Savior for? Just live your life honestly."

Xia Ning rubbed her reddened forehead, completely stunned.

She had never heard anyone deconstruct the meaning of Magical Girl from this perspective before.

In her mind, gaining extraordinary power meant bearing the heavy burden of saving the world.

But this ordinary young man, who meticulously calculates every penny for a few dollars each day, belittles all of this as cheap part-time work.

"But... but Monster kill people!"

Xia Ning retorted softly, "If we don't do anything, what will happen to ordinary people?"

"If the sky falls, the tall ones will hold it up."

Su Bai turned around, leaning against the rusty guardrail, his tone flat and without any emotion.

"The West District's defenses have collapsed. That's War General fault of the Monster Hunting Bureau's Headquarters and special agents. Deduct their performance bonuses and hold their bureau chief accountable."

"You're a minor girl who hasn't even graduated high school yet, taking a few meager tips while acting like you're saving the world. Aren't you shameless?"

Su Bai's words were crude and blunt, yet they struck Xia Ning's heart like a heavy hammer.

"Lady Ziwei can kill Monster in one move because she is the leader, she takes the biggest benefits, and it's her duty to be at the forefront."

"Su Xiaoxiao's ability to deflect attacks is due to her good luck; she stumbled upon a powerful weapon called the 'Turtle Shell'."

"And you? You blocked the way for three seconds at the convenience store today, buying time for the civilians behind you to escape. You've already exceeded your quota."

Su Bai took the warm coffee from Xia Ning's hand and took a big gulp.

"You've already exceeded the task requirements, and the organization hasn't even given you a bonus. You're still crying on the balcony, feeling like you're mediocre?"

"The first principle for working people is to avoid internal conflict and shift the risk to their superiors."

Xia Ning stared blankly as Su Bai finished the rest of his coffee, her mind a complete mess.

These absurd and nonsensical words, when they reached her ears, strangely dispelled the gloom deep in her heart.

So... is it possible to not work so hard?

So, when facing monsters, fear and trembling aren't some unforgivable sin?

The night breeze was still damp, but Xia Ning's chill had unknowingly dissipated by more than half.

She took a deep breath of the rain-soaked air, and the tightness in her chest finally subsided completely.

"Brother Su Bai."

Xia Ning lowered her head, and the corners of her mouth couldn't help but curve slightly.

"Your words are really harsh, but... they seem to make some sense."

Su Bai crumpled the empty paper cup into a ball and accurately threw it into the trash can.

"What's the value of reason? Being able to fill your stomach is the only real reason."

Su Bai patted the dust off his hands, yawned, and made a move to go back to the living room to sleep.

He had just reached the glass door when he paused, turned around, and glanced back at Xia Ning.

"For example, now that you know your role in this Star Magical Girls, what other unresolved issues do you have?"