Someone who sought death...

I had Suguru Geto and Satoru Gojo take Nanako and Mimiko to Miss Shoko Ieiri ahead of me.

I wandered around Jujutsu High alone, not knowing where to go.

I had no intention of raising them myself. Besides, Geto had raised them well in the original story, aside from a few problems with their beliefs.

But none of that mattered to me. After all, even the children I raised were more or less... (Dark Atsushi and the main world's Akutagawa were both kids Dazai raised in the Port Mafia. Hmm, did growing up in the Mafia make them more unusual?)

Still, I didn't think that was my problem.

As for why I didn't want to raise Nanako and Mimiko, no one should expect someone who sought death to give another person's life meaning.

There was no need. For now, I had no interest in instilling my philosophy of suicide in those two lovely little ladies, nor did I feel like raising two children as someone who would soon die.

I firmly believed that one day, I would successfully kill myself!

With that thought, I looked at my wrist, which had only just scabbed over, then at the dagger I always carried. After a moment's consideration, I silently unwound the bandages around my wrist and brought the blade down.

Blood instantly gushed out, and I quietly sat alone on the railing, waiting to bleed out and die.

After an entire day on the road, time had passed quite quickly.

From the dawn when I first met Satoru Gojo and Suguru Geto to the dusk before me now, all that had really happened was a long drive.

A faint, warm breeze brushed against me. This was the same platform where I had watched the sunrise years ago, and it hadn't changed much since then.

The battering of wind and rain seemed to have taken little away. I, too, sat here just as I had back then.

Slowly, my body began to grow cold. I was terribly dizzy, yet reflexively kept myself from falling from this height.

In the warm glow of dusk, dark red blood ran down my wrist to my fingertips, dripping below the edge of the balcony.

For a moment, I felt dazed. Yet no matter how hazy my mind became, I maintained a composed smile and a carefree silhouette, still sitting on the railing just as before.

Ah, could I finally embrace the death I had dreamed of?

If that was true, how wonderful!

As I thought that, my mind grew ever foggier. I tilted my head up slightly, gazing toward the shimmering sunlight as I waited for the sun to set-and for my life to end.

"Dazai!"

Suddenly, a voice came from behind me, followed by the hurried sound of running footsteps.

Someone seemed to be calling me. Honestly, why did they have to find me at a time like this?

With that thought, I barely fought off the drowsiness and turned my head slightly, wearing the same faint smile as before.

"Ah, it's you, Teacher Yaga."

As I spoke, I tightened my grip on the railing beneath my hand, rose with a flourish, and landed squarely on the ground, though the blood loss nearly kept me from standing.

Teacher Yaga frowned, clearly disapproving of what I had done, but perhaps because I had already attempted suicide far, far too many times before.

Although Teacher Yaga was unhappy, he didn't say much. He merely patted my shoulder lightly and frowned at my still-bleeding wrist.

Then he searched my pocket for some unused bandages and wrapped them around the bleeding wound, layer after layer.

Teacher Yaga brought me back to my dorm room, then tossed me onto the bed despite my vehement protests. After a deep sigh, he searched my room for the first-aid kit normally used to treat me.

In theory, there shouldn't have been anything like a first-aid kit in my room. But Teacher Yaga brought one along every time he came, and eventually, I lost interest in throwing it away.

Still looking somewhat exasperated, Teacher Yaga dressed my wound. Once he confirmed that I was all right, he left me alone in my room.

After Teacher Yaga left, I staggered out of bed again and locked the door, fighting through my headache.

Then I threw myself back onto the bed and gazed blankly as dusk gradually faded and a sky full of stars slowly appeared before my eyes.

Summer nights always took so very long to arrive. Fortunately, most of my assignments were at night, and I kept the curtains in my dorm room drawn for long stretches during the day.

All in all, it wasn't something that mattered much to me, was it?

At least, that was how it seemed for now.

Even though I hadn't rested for over twenty-four hours, I still didn't feel sleepy.

I simply stared silently at the bandages wound around my wrist and the freshly treated wound.

"Ah-how mean, Teacher Yaga. You interrupted my suicide again."

I'd finally had the sudden inspiration to kill myself by slitting my wrist. I'd already been so close to dying, yet Teacher Yaga had dragged me back.

I grumbled and complained under my breath, but obediently pulled the blanket over my head. After a glance at my travel-worn self and the bandages I still hadn't changed, I ultimately stayed in bed.

Someone who sought death really had no business making those two adorable little ladies suffer.

Someone certain to die early had no need to leave others with too much to remember them by.

There was no need... but why had Teacher Yaga never looked disappointed in me?

I'd pushed Teacher Yaga away countless times. I'd told him over and over that I didn't need any concern or affection at all.

Even though...

As my thoughts slowly wandered, the blood-loss buff began to make even my normally vigilant self drowsy, until time wore away the last trace of consciousness.

Perhaps it was because something weighed on my mind. Whatever the reason, I slept terribly that night, just as I always did.

But since this was already normal for me, I didn't have much to say about it.

It was only three in the morning, and the sky was still completely dark. I rubbed the space between my brows, climbed out of bed, and hurried over to the sink.

I removed the bandages that had covered my body, then eagerly ran to the cabinet to rummage for fresh ones.

Before heading out, I put on my faint smile once more, and warmth returned to my brown eyes.