Who was I, really?
Who was I?
"You're Osamu Dazai!"
"Oh, right. I'm Osamu Dazai."
"Dazai, my ass! Get up!"
Still half asleep, I heard a furious shout beside my ear, scratched my head, and abruptly sat up in bed.
The first thing I saw was a group of friends and family beside me, standing or sitting around my bed. All of them were already in cosplay, making me, still lying in bed, look completely out of place.
"Get up already. We've been waiting for you for an hour. Oda Sweetblade-no-suke is about to start complaining."
The Chūya Nakahara cosplayer furiously yanked off my blanket, grabbed my cosplay outfit, and flung it onto my head.
"What the hell is Oda Sweetblade-no-suke? Him complaining would be totally OOC!"
"If you know that, why aren't you getting up? It took me ages to get my uncle to cosplay old man Hirotsu. Everything's ready, and now you, our boss, are going to drop the ball?"
"Well, IF Line Chūya definitely wouldn't talk to me like that!"
"Shut up."
"Okay."
With that, the Chūya Nakahara cosplayer led an Atsushi Nakajima cosplayer out with his left hand and an eager Oda Sakunosuke cosplayer with his right, leaving me plenty of time to change.
I stared silently at the clothes in front of me, my thoughts drifting in a daze. Only when I heard the frantic calls to hurry up outside did I leisurely start getting dressed.
I remembered having a dream yesterday, one that had filled me with both delight and terror.
I dreamed that I'd traveled to another world, but despite cosplaying the boss, I hadn't ended up in a Bungo Stray Dogs storyline. Instead, I'd gone next door to Jujutsu Kaisen. I dreamed that I'd slowly undergone Assimilation, and then, and then...
What else had happened?
I couldn't quite remember, but none of that mattered anyway. Dreams meant the opposite of reality, after all.
With that thought, I grabbed the Red Scarf lying beside me and put it on, then ran smugly over to the full-length mirror in the bathroom, clutching the Complete Suicide Manual to my chest.
"Yep! This is perfect."
I thought for a moment, and for some inexplicable reason, I took the rope for hanging myself along too.
I'd secretly brought it home after our last photo shoot together, intending to take some pictures on my own, but my laziness had eventually put an end to that plan.
After carefully checking that both my makeup and my clothes were all right, I ambled out of the bedroom.
A group of friends and family stood in front of me, so I put on the airs of the Port Mafia boss and cheerfully took my place at the front.
I also discussed with the Chūya Nakahara cosplayer what sort of heart-wrenching scene we should come up with next to make it truly unforgettable.
Come to think of it, I was going bungee jumping with my friends today too. I'd arrange for the photographer to capture my fall perfectly!
Port Mafia office building: "One leap to end all sorrows" achievement unlocked ✓
Anyway, I was determined to claim the titles of most dedicated cosplayer and most convincing cosplayer!
With that thought, I sat in our chartered van, lost in a daze.
I kept feeling as though I'd forgotten something, but yesterday's dream had already grown hazy.
Forget it, forget it. No more thinking about that.
I cleared my mind, only to stop short as we passed the Jujutsu Kaisen photo shoot next door.
Teacher Yaga, Satoru, Geto, Nanami, Haibara... what else?
Two names rose unbidden in my mind: Nozomu Sakai and Sōsuke Mizukawa. Huh? Why would those two names be there?
What had I forgotten?
"Come on, boss!"
Before I could stand there in a daze for long, I heard my friend beside me speak through gritted teeth.
"Yeah, yeah. What's the hurry, little slug?"
"I finally understand why Chūya Nakahara always wants to punch Osamu Dazai!"
"You're OOC, shorty."
"You bastard!"
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