Food diplomacy

For Shinji, the biggest challenge in the Ninja Academy's academic classes wasn't the material itself. It was figuring out how to coast through without revealing that he was an old soul masquerading as a child.

The Will of Fire ethics class was Shinji's designated nap time. Whenever Umino Kakumatsu, or the occasional substitute teacher Ito-a middle-aged male ninja with sharp eyes-passionately proclaimed from the podium, "Where leaves dance, fire burns eternal," stressing devotion, sacrifice, and the spirit of protecting the village, Shinji usually propped his chin on his hand and stared into space, his thoughts already miles away. Sometimes he pondered the bizarre achievement names in his system; sometimes he tried to remember which games he hadn't finished in his previous life. More often, he was sound asleep.

Naturally, his spaced-out demeanor didn't escape everyone's notice. A few students from minor clans who flocked around Masashige Sarutobi occasionally shot him disdainful looks and muttered, "The Uchiha really don't care about the Will of Fire." Shinji ignored them all. Minato Namikaze, who sat diagonally ahead of him, listened with exceptional attention every time, his blue eyes shining with agreement and aspiration as he took meticulous notes.

By comparison, mathematics and basic ninjutsu theory managed to perk Shinji up a little. Not because he particularly loved studying, but because these subjects involved logic and underlying principles, giving him an instinctive sense of familiarity as a former programmer. Still, he stuck to his policy of keeping a low profile and never volunteered an answer. Only when a teacher called on him did he lazily stand, give the most concise and accurate answer possible, then sit down amid looks that said "Of course" or betrayed a hint of surprise.

This attitude of knowing the answers but being too lazy to show it left Ito, who taught theory, both impressed and exasperated. He admired Shinji's talent and despaired of his attitude.

The real display of being in a completely different league came during a history lesson.

That lesson covered the alliance between the clans in Konoha's early founding days. When the teacher mentioned the legendary battle between Hashirama Senju and Madara Uchiha at the Valley of the End, he added in passing, "...As for the specific details of the battle between these two forebears, especially the many powerful ninjutsu Madara Uchiha used, the passage of time has left much of the historical record unclear or lost..."

Shinji had been idly twirling his pen. Hearing this, he unconsciously muttered under his breath. His voice wasn't loud, but it carried with unusual clarity through the quiet classroom. "...Nothing particularly special. He just used the Sharingan's chakra control and his enormous chakra reserves to push the fusion of shape and nature transformations across multiple high-level Fire Release techniques to the limit, then crushed his opponent with the absolute power of Perfect Susanoo. The core tactic was to use terrain and genjutsu to create an opening for a one-hit kill. Too bad he ran into a cheating bastard who could activate Sage Mode..."

Quiet though he was, Shikaku Nara's ears twitched in the front row. He turned and looked at Shinji as though he were a monster. The teacher at the podium also stopped, staring at Shinji in bewilderment. "Uchiha, what...did you just say?"

Only then did Shinji realize he might have said too much. He immediately adopted an innocent, confused expression. "Huh? Teacher, I didn't say anything. I was just marveling at how powerful those two forebears were!" His performance was natural and flawless.

The teacher remained skeptical but didn't pursue it, assuming he had misheard. Only Shikaku's gaze gained an extra layer of meaning. After class, he came over and asked quietly, "Hey, Shinji, what did you mean by 'cheating bastard'? And what's 'Perfect Susanoo'? Some clan secret?"

Shinji's expression didn't change. "You misheard. I was reciting a ceremonial prayer passed down in my clan. The pronunciation is pretty archaic."

"...Like hell I believe you," Shikaku said. Still, he was smart enough not to press further, merely committing those two terms to memory.

Lunchtime was when the school's miniature social scene was on full display.

Children from the major clans mostly brought their own lunches, carefully prepared and nutritionally balanced. Choza Akimichi's lunchbox was always the largest, piled high with all kinds of calorie-rich food. His happy, absorbed expression as he ate was positively infectious. The Ino-Shika-Cho trio usually gathered to share their food. Occasionally, Shikaku would "steal" a piece of fried chicken from Choza, making him squawk in protest while Inoichi laughed and played mediator.

Things were livelier around Masashige Sarutobi. Several children from minor clans gathered around him, chatting and laughing as they ate. Their conversation occasionally drifted toward things like, "Yesterday, my father went on a mission with Lord Hokage..." with a subtle undertone of showing off.

Minato Namikaze and Kushina Uzumaki presented a different scene altogether. Minato's lunch was simple, usually rice balls, fried eggs, and some vegetables, but he savored it. Kushina's looked like the standard meal from the school cafeteria. She still seemed to be adjusting to Konoha's food, sometimes frowning as she poked at her meal and quietly complained that it wasn't as good as the food in Uzushio Village.

Shinji's lunch was lovingly prepared by his mother, Uchiha An, and the portions were enormous-specifically increased to account for his [Glutton] talent. He usually found a seat by the window and ate alone, demolishing his food in a whirlwind. His speed and appetite occasionally left classmates who happened to glance his way speechless.

As the two reigning kings of enormous appetites, Shinji and Choza got along quite well. They often abandoned their respective friends to engage in a thoroughly satisfying lunchtime showdown!

That day, Shinji was busy digging in when an indignant voice rang out beside him. "Hey! Shinji Uchiha!"

Shinji looked up to see Kushina with her dazzling red hair. She held a cafeteria tray that had barely been touched, and displeasure was written all over her face.

"What's wrong, Little Chili Pepper? Cafeteria food not to your taste, so you want to steal mine?" Shinji teased after swallowing his mouthful.

"Who wants to steal yours?" Kushina glared at him, though there was more frustration than anger in her eyes. "It's...it's that idiot Minato!"

"Oh?" Shinji's interest perked up. "What did that sunny pretty boy do to upset you?"

"He...he actually gave me some of his fried egg!" Kushina said, her cheeks reddening a little. "Said I didn't seem to have much of an appetite... Who needs his pity? Besides, he barely had any lunch himself!"

Shinji looked at the admittedly unappetizing cafeteria food on Kushina's tray, then thought of Minato's simple lunch and understood at once. Suppressing a laugh, he said with a perfectly straight face, "How could that be pity? That's clearly a demonstration of solidarity and friendship between comrades! The Will of Fire put into practice! Namikaze has a very enlightened outlook!"

"You...what nonsense are you spouting?" Kushina stamped her foot at his absurd reasoning, but some of her awkward feelings seemed to fade. She glanced at Shinji's lunchbox, piled like a little mountain, and suddenly had an idea. "Hey, Shinji, you seem to eat a lot. Could you...share a little with me? I'll trade you my cafeteria food!" She really couldn't stomach today's dishes.

Shinji raised an eyebrow, amused by the awkward Little Chili Pepper before him. Generously, he pushed his lunchbox a little closer. "Here, help yourself. No need to trade. My mom's afraid I'll go hungry, so she always makes too much." Yep, the [Glutton] skill needs plenty of energy. Mom really gets it.

Kushina froze for a moment. She hadn't expected the Uchiha who bickered with her all day to be so easygoing about it. Murmuring a quiet "Thank you," she carefully picked out some tasty-looking dishes and placed them on her tray.

Minato Namikaze happened to walk over just in time to see this. Looking at the lovely, clearly homemade food now on Kushina's tray, then at the small gap in Shinji's lunchbox, he smiled warmly. "Thank you, Shinji."

"No problem. Just looking after our international friend's appetite." Shinji waved a hand and went back to digging in.

His phrasing made Minato laugh. Kushina glared at Shinji again, but this time there was no hostility in her eyes, only a little embarrassment. A small, slightly awkward bridge of friendship, built out of food, seemed to have quietly taken shape.

After lunch, Shinji took his customary stroll around the school grounds to help his food settle. Seeing Shikaku sitting alone beneath a tree, deep in thought over a simple game board that seemed to be used for simulating tactics, he wandered over.

"Shogi?" Shinji asked after a glance.

"Yeah." Shikaku didn't look up. "Want a game? I won't go easy on you this time."

Shinji scoffed. "You say that like you ever did." He sat down beside him. The outcome was a foregone conclusion. Without using his beyond-normal computing power-mostly because he wouldn't win even if he did-Shinji was once again utterly routed by Shikaku.

"Your tactical thinking is too straightforward," Shikaku drawled as he gathered the pieces. "No flexibility or traps. Just like your personality."

"Heh. Better than a certain sneaky old bas- ahem, strategist hiding in the shadows," Shinji shot back.

The two traded idle jabs, enjoying the leisurely afternoon. Sunlight filtered through the leaves in dappled patches, and the sounds of other children playing drifted over from the distant playground. For Shinji, who had endured the brutal grind of working life-twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week-this peaceful, mildly entertaining school routine was a different kind of pleasure. He just didn't know how long that peace would last. He looked at Minato Namikaze in the distance, smiling brightly as he spoke with several classmates, then at Shikaku Nara beside him, extraordinarily intelligent yet utterly languid. A faint premonition stirred within him: these seemingly ordinary classmates would all make considerable waves in the Shinobi World someday. And how would he, an "anomaly" carrying a system and memories of a previous life, fit into it all-or even change it?