Two figures drifted down from above and landed without so much as stirring a speck of dust.
"Oh, it's you, Josen!"
Realization dawned on Saitama, and he immediately relaxed. He didn't know the old man beside Josen who was giving him such a leering once-over, but anyone who came with Officer Josen surely couldn't be a bad person.
"I spotted this guy stealing when I passed a music and video store, so I chased him all the way here," Saitama explained, scratching the back of his head sheepishly. "Sorry you had to see that."
"What's there to be embarrassed about?" Josen shook his head, countering with a serious expression. "All I saw was a noble character. That's exactly what I'd expect from someone I chose as a friend!"
As he spoke, he discreetly put away a brand-new "Limiter Fragment."
Bang nodded with a smile as well. "The courage to face a monster head-on is a rare quality in itself. Are you a Hero too, young man?"
"Haha, you really think that highly of me?" Embarrassed by their praise, Saitama answered, "To be precise, I'm still training to become a Hero. I've got a long way to go!"
"Is that so? You're quite modest!" Bang nodded to himself at Saitama's answer, his opinion of the young man rising another couple of notches.
Still, why do I get the feeling this kid is just like Josen, with no interest in martial arts either...
At that thought, the old man's good mood crumpled, and he sank into a funk.
Unlike the old man, Josen was in a very good mood.
He reached out, and another "Limiter Fragment" went into his deck.
Perfect!
"By the way, Saitama, have you had lunch? If not, join us. We're heading to my place for a drink."
Josen asked casually, raising a hand to mime drinking.
Gurgle...
A strange noise sounded in the alley, and all three of them immediately looked toward its source.
Saitama's stomach.
Clue detected.
Josen immediately waved a hand, sparing Saitama any explanation. "All right, I get it."
"..." ×2
"Um, I accidentally tore my clothes again, so I'd like to stop by a clothing store first." Saitama had more or less grown used to Josen's enthusiasm. He nodded and tugged at his badly damaged sweatpants to show him. "I know a really nice shop owner. Sometimes he doesn't even charge me."
"Uh..."
Josen had been about to offer him some of his own clothes, but then reconsidered. Friendship needed to be on equal footing. If all he ever did was give, wouldn't that turn into charity?
"All right, then. We'll wait for you at my place. Be quick."
"Roger!"
Watching Saitama dash away, Josen glanced at the motionless monster on the ground and thought for a moment. "Mr. Bang, how about contacting Lanny to have this taken care of? We really shouldn't leave a monster lying here."
"Indeed," Bang agreed.
Josen called Lanny and explained the situation, specifically mentioning that Saitama had defeated the monster.
But when Lanny heard that Saitama wasn't a registered professional Hero, her interest immediately faded. She simply assured him several times that she would send someone over right away to handle the aftermath.
Josen had no intention of making decisions for Saitama, either. After all, Saitama himself didn't care about empty fame.
(A certain bald man, looking frantic: "Hey, I still care about the bounty for the monster!")
Sizzle-
Pungent cooking fumes rose through the kitchen, only to be whisked away by the range hood's powerful suction.
Ingredients floated all around Josen, obediently washing themselves clean, landing on the cutting board to be chopped into suitably sized pieces, then jumping into the pan one after another.
Next came precisely measured seasonings and sauces. The entire process was neatly ordered; the guy holding the spatula only had to stir-fry.
In fact, if he wanted to be even lazier, he could have left the whole thing to his Psychic Power.
In the living room, Saitama and Bang held their teacups and glanced in unison toward the man showing off in the kitchen. Even the young idols singing and dancing on television had lost their appeal.
"Psychic Powers really are such a cheat..."
Saitama muttered, meeting Bang's gaze.
(ーー゛)
( ﹁ ﹁ )
┑(￣Д ￣)┍×2
"Hey, hey, heeey! Chicken soup's here~"
Wearing an apron, Josen carried over a huge pot of chicken soup, with several plates of hot dishes floating beside him. "Since there are three of us, let's have hot pot. I also stir-fried a few dishes to go with the drinks. Nobody leaves sober today!"
He clapped his hands, releasing a wealth of fresh ingredients from the convenience store out of Fantasy Cards. The electric hot pot, now plugged in, began to boil as well.
Bubble, bubble, bubble...
The rich aroma of broth made from a whole chicken filled the air, tantalizing all three men's taste buds.
Soon, the spacious coffee table was covered. As Josen brought out several large cases of beer, some chilled and some at room temperature, Bang's and Saitama's gazes gradually turned solemn. In that moment, their masculine instincts reached a mutual understanding, telling them-
This would be war!
That night.
After seeing off the drunken Bang and Saitama, Josen stretched and activated his Psychic Power, cleaning up the wreckage of the battlefield.
One was a formidable martial artist, and the other was a bald demon king destined to stand at the pinnacle of the world. Josen had no concerns whatsoever about their safety.
If anything, the monsters of Z City had better burn incense and pray to the gods that they wouldn't run into either of them outside.
Last month, even four ten-pulls, including the drops from monsters, had failed to yield anything good. Yet the "Water Breathing Technique" he had farmed from Bang today was only his third SR since transmigrating! Josen hardly knew what to say. At least his body had grown a little tougher thanks to his steadily improving four core stats.
The increase in Psychic Power in particular had made his telekinesis easier to use, to the point that he had briefly considered switching classes to become an artillery mage.
Unfortunately, he still hadn't unlocked a light spell, so that idea had remained on hold.
Today, he had saved up enough for another ten-pull. With his Stand's upgrade complete as well, his card-drawing itch immediately flared up.
My turn! Draw!
[Speed (N): Attribute Card, description omitted.] [Constitution (N): Attribute Card, description omitted.] [Strength (N): Attribute Card, description omitted.] [Constitution (N): Attribute Card, description omitted.] [Strength (N): Attribute Card, description omitted.] [Constitution (N): Attribute Card, description omitted.] [Strength (N): Attribute Card, description omitted.] [Strength (N): Attribute Card, description omitted.] [Spirit (SR): Attribute Card, 100 units of the spirit attribute, description omitted.] [AT Force Field (SR): Ability Card, a soul substance (spiritual power) unique to life in the EVA world. The "wall of the heart" that separates oneself and one's ego from the objective world, also known as the "Absolute Domain."]
What a god-tier pull!
Two successive flashes of purple nearly blinded him. Josen rubbed his eyes hard before finally confirming that he wasn't dreaming.
Seriously? Nothing for a whole month, and now you all show up at once?
That makes three SRs in a single day!
But hey, you can never have too many of these~
Before you continue