Help Me, Help Me!

Ling An felt as though his ears had been violated.

What kind of ancient god's whisper was this?

He remembered Sanhua asking him last night whether he could talk.

All he'd done was play a tiny prank.

Did she really have to hold such a grudge?

An angry Ling An said goodbye to Chixia and headed to the Border Fortress alone.

Clearly, he needed to teach Sanhua a lesson she wouldn't forget.

At the entrance to the Border Fortress, a guard stopped him. "The Border Fortress is a restricted area. Unauthorized persons..."

The guard glanced at Ling An and amended his statement. "Unauthorized cats are also forbidden from entering."

Ling An silently pushed the gourd toward him.

The guard took the gourd to verify his credentials, surprise appearing in his eyes.

"This level of clearance is probably second only to the Magistrate's and Rover's."

He immediately straightened up and said solemnly, "So you're the newly appointed Patroller Ling An. Please come in!"

Ling An swaggered into the Border Fortress.

In the reception room, he found Sanhua sitting alone.

Through Sanhua's eyes, a fierce aura of Tacet Discords came rushing toward her.

She startled at first, then immediately realized who it was. "Ling An? What brings you here?"

Ling An leaped onto the table without a word.

He simply fixed his slit pupils on Sanhua.

Looking a little guilty, Sanhua said, "Even though you're a Patroller now, the Border Fortress is a restricted area. You should avoid coming here too often..."

Ling An remained impassive. With a light tap of his claw, the gourd sounded:

"Help me, help me!"

Sanhua froze, then immediately realized why Ling An had come looking for her.

She tilted her head up to avoid his gaze, as though her thoughts at that moment were audible:

This ceiling sure is a ceiling.

Ling An paid no heed. "Help me, help me!"

Sanhua said quietly, "I specifically asked the Research Institute to make this. A lot of effort went into it..."

"Help me, help me!"

"Oh, right. As a bodyguard, I haven't made a proper patrol today..."

"Help me, help me!"

Sanhua rose and hurried away.

Ling An followed right behind her. "Help me, help me!"

He trailed Sanhua through the corridor, never once stopping his paw from pressing the button.

The noise from the gourd filled the entire Border Fortress.

At the entrance, the guard peered inside curiously.

Something seemed a little unusual about the Border Fortress today.

"Lady Sanhua, is that you speaking?" he asked.

The guard's voice was the final straw that broke Sanhua.

She waved a hand feebly. "It's nothing."

Then she looked at Ling An, who had remained silent the whole time yet somehow made an incredible racket.

"Fine, you win. I'll replace the audio clips for you. Happy now?"

Ling An didn't move.

She thinks she can get rid of me just like that? Does she take me for a beggar?

Come to think of it, when she'd held him on the street last time, Sanhua's embrace had been awkward and cold.

Still, it had a charm all its own.

He pressed the gourd. "My turn!"

Sanhua stared blankly at him and murmured, "What turn?"

Then she saw Ling An stand on tiptoe and spread his arms.

"Absolutely not!" She shook her head repeatedly, refusing sternly.

She absolutely did not want to experience that a second time.

Ling An gave a wicked smile inwardly. That's not up to you.

He made the gourd blare again. "Help me, help me!"

Sanhua quickened her steps even further.

She wanted to cry but had no tears left. Who was going to help her now?

If she'd known this would happen, she never would have pulled that prank.

Only after half an hour did the noise filling the Border Fortress finally stop.

Sanhua leaned against a wall, her eyes lifeless.

Ling An stuck doggedly to her feet.

Heh heh.

There was nothing Ling An set his mind to that he couldn't accomplish.

Of course, he only dared act so brazenly because he knew Sanhua was cold on the outside but warm on the inside.

Deciding the time was right, Ling An sprang into the air.

Without the slightest hesitation, he jumped into Sanhua's arms.

Here comes the little flying kitty!

The next second-

"Great Red Lotus!!!"

Ling An flew backward down the entire corridor and landed sprawled at the entrance.

"Patroller Ling An, what happened to you?" The guard gave Ling An a puzzled look, then stole a glance inside the Border Fortress.

A wave of bone-chilling cold surged out of the Border Fortress.

Ling An got up awkwardly and made a show of dusting himself off.

What are you looking at?

Wasn't there some event lately involving running along rooftops and walls?

Can't I get some practice in early?

Sanhua, honestly.

If it's a no, just say no. Did she really have to use her ultimate?

Good thing I'm tough.

Otherwise, that hit would've left me bedridden for half a month.

He took off the miniature gourd, pushed it toward the guard, and pointed inside.

The guard immediately understood what he meant and said earnestly, "Don't worry. I'll make sure Lady Sanhua receives it."

Only then did Ling An leave the Border Fortress, thoroughly satisfied.

That hit the spot.

He had to admit that while Sanhua was a little slow on the uptake in certain respects, she really was efficient.

Before noon, the newly modified miniature gourd terminal was delivered to Ling An.

The new gourd was identical to the previous one in every other respect; only its audio clips had been updated.

Of course, quite a few of Ling An's suggestions had been incorporated into the new audio clips.

The gourd now contained a huge number of clips, covering all sorts of communication for daily life and combat.

At last, he could communicate normally.

It wasn't as though Ling An had never considered using the gourd as a cover while speaking in his real voice.

But since he had taken feline form, he would have to open his mouth to speak normally.

Surely he wasn't going to learn ventriloquism just for something so trivial.

There was no guarantee he'd succeed, either. Come to think of it, could cats even do ventriloquism?

With the gourd successfully modified, Ling An finally had a reliable external vocal organ.

But why do these voices sound like a mix of men, women, old people, and children?

Are machine recordings in Jinzhou really this unusual?

Ling An fiddled with the terminal. He was now an official Patroller, too!

He was sure it wouldn't be long before his name spread throughout Jinzhou City.

In truth, Ling An had underestimated himself.

His name had already spread throughout Jinzhou City and beyond the moment he defeated Jingming at the Training Camp and became a Patroller.

After all, a cat becoming a Patroller certainly gave people plenty to speculate about.

If he could see Jinzhou's headlines right now, he would surely be shocked speechless.

Speculation about his current identity was flying everywhere in the headlines.

As Ling An walked along the street, whispers reached his ears.

Secrets!

Ling An's eyes lit up.

He looked over and saw two passersby sitting on a bench, chatting.

As far as Ling An was concerned, no decent person should ever eavesdrop on someone else's secrets.

It was utterly shameless.

So, naturally, he crouched behind the bench and pricked up his ears.

What are you looking at?

I'm not a person.

"Hey, did you see today's Jinzhou headlines?" one asked.

"Of course. You mean the cat Patroller, right?" the other replied.

"Exactly, exactly. I'm telling you, things really are changing in Jinzhou. They actually made a cat a Patroller. Sure, let him catch mice, but making him a Patroller? I don't get it."

"Oh, come on. Haven't you seen everyone speculating about it? If you ask me, there's definitely more to it!"

"Let's hear it, then?"

"The most popular theory right now is that this cat isn't an ordinary cat at all!"

"What's so ordinary or extraordinary about a cat?"

"Listen." The passerby's voice grew quieter. "Apparently, this cat is very likely Lady Jinhsi's pet, and she's just arranged a position for him!"