Ryuk stared at the glittering gold touchscreen Book of Life and Death before him, his claw hovering in midair, unable to bring himself to touch it.
"Tap it!" Horse Face urged beside him. "Director Lin's newly developed 'Book of Life and Death OS 2.0' is waiting for you to test its first soul-reaping assignment."
Trembling, Ryuk poked the name of a thoroughly wicked arms dealer on the screen. Flashy effects suddenly burst across the interface: [Ding! Premium customer detected! We recommend the 'Hell VIP Package': enjoy 20% off, plus unlimited free refills of Meng Po's soup!]
"What the hell is this?!" Ryuk's skeletal wings flared in fright.
"Business innovation." Horse Face swiped expertly across the screen. "Look, we can even send dying people a 'Terminal Care Investment Package.' Installment payments accepted..."
Before Horse Face could finish, a system pop-up appeared: [Warning! Target is currently watching "The Complete Collection of Hell Jokes"! Under Article 38 of the new regulations, official duties may not be performed during a customer's entertainment time!]
Just then, the crisp click of dress shoes rang out in the corridor. Lin Chen approached in a tailored suit, holding a holographic tablet. The badge on his chest now read "Chief Engineer of Three Realms Digital Transformation."
"Ryuk, your customer satisfaction rating last month was only two stars." Lin Chen adjusted his gleaming glasses. "Someone complained that you played 'Good Fortune Comes' as background music while reaping their soul."
"Wasn't that the system's built-in advertising jingle?!" Ryuk slapped the touchscreen in despair and accidentally tapped the [Hell Live Stream] icon.
[Welcome to the "Death Is Coming" live stream! Current viewers: 380 million] [User "Sweet Little Meng Po" tipped one red spider lily] [User "Bro Yama" commented: Can the streamer reap a soul live for us?]
"Turn it off!