As long as I live, the trouble never stops

--Leave your brain here--

(The protagonist has a Japanese name because I personally think a Chinese name would look strange in Naruto, a Japanese anime, so I used a name generator. The name has no connection to real life, and the protagonist's allegiance is Chinese by default. I'm a new author with no experience, and I'm really sorry if this has spoiled your reading experience. Let me kowtow in apology!) (Also, by "fun," I mean the characters stabbing each other in the back while we readers enjoy the show.) (The early story focuses on causing trouble, while the later story leans toward everyday life. Please read whichever parts suit you.) (Hope you all enjoy reading!)

"CRASH!"

Watanabe Ichiro had been sitting in a restaurant, peacefully enjoying his dinner, when he looked up and saw the front of a truck glinting coldly as it smashed through the glass doors. It roared toward him and reached him in an instant.

"Huh?!"

Watanabe Ichiro's pupils widened. Before he could even begin to dodge, the dump truck neatly dispatched him to another world.

"So, this is the world of Naruto?"

Watanabe Ichiro sat cross-legged, propping up his chin as he watched the battlefield before him, where the sounds of slaughter shook the sky.

Judging by their clothing, the two sides in the melee were probably the Uchiha Clan and the Senju Clan. Ninjutsu and all kinds of concealed weapons flew across the battlefield as though they cost nothing, while death and grievous injuries unfolded across the land.

At the moment, Watanabe Ichiro was nothing more than a transparent spirit sitting in the middle of the battlefield, letting Shuriken and Kunai pass straight through him.

"But where's my body?"

"Please remain calm, esteemed host. I am the [Fun-Seeker] system. All you need to do is cause trouble to earn points. Those points can be exchanged for abilities and supplies in the shop, or used to construct bodies with different identities, potential, and bloodlines."

A translucent blue interface appeared before Watanabe Ichiro, and he casually browsed through it.

Good grief, this shop really had everything. There were Naruto-specific things like the Otsutsuki bloodline, the Rinnegan, and the Tenseigan... as well as some strange items, such as a room you couldn't leave without having sex, something that made your nose grow whenever you lied, and something that took off one centimeter whenever you missed an update... Tsk. These were truly evil things that shouldn't exist in this world.

Watanabe Ichiro's eyes lit up, but when he looked at the point costs listed beside them, he couldn't help sighing.

Items native to the Naruto world were still priced within a reasonable range, but anything from another world started at ten digits. The more powerful an item and the more outrageous its effects, the more points it required. Even unassuming little things from other worlds were expensive. They offered far too little value to be worth buying.

"Points are a numerical representation of energy, and constructing an item from another world requires a hundred times the energy needed for one from this world. I am only a beginner-level system, so I cannot reduce the point costs for you. I am truly sorry, esteemed host." A hint of guilt crept into the system's mechanical voice.

"How do I earn points?" Watanabe Ichiro waved dismissively, signaling for the system to continue explaining.

"By causing trouble. Sources of points include, but are not limited to, emotional fluctuations in canon characters, changes to the worldline, and alterations to canon characters' fates..."

"You may bind yourself to a target. Any changes related to that target will earn you double points."

"So I can pick someone and keep screwing him over to earn points more efficiently?"

"You could put it that way."

"Then what counts as causing trouble?"

"[As long as it pleases me, anything goes.] Your will is my will. As long as you're having fun, your points will increase."

That good? That's way too lenient. Watanabe Ichiro couldn't help feeling suspicious. Since when was there such a thing as a free lunch?

A pop-up suddenly appeared before him. It read:

[System service rating collection]--From the Main God World

"If it's convenient, could you give me a five-star review? It really means a lot to me! We systems rely on these to upgrade. Pretty please! (Slides onto knees)"

So that's what you were after. Watanabe Ichiro was speechless. Has the rat race gotten so bad that even transmigration systems have KPIs now?

Whatever. One corporate drone shouldn't make life difficult for another. The system had a good attitude, so he gave it five stars with a sweep of his hand.

"Thank you so, so much!!! (Offers flowers)"

"The [Fun-Seeker] system offers comprehensive service. May you enjoy the journey ahead! Have fun!"

After considering it for a moment, Watanabe Ichiro chose [Black Zetsu] as his bound target.

There were three reasons.

First, that sneaky old bastard Black Zetsu had lived longer than anyone else in the Naruto world, making him the richest source of points to milk.

Second, once he had bound his target, Watanabe Ichiro could locate Black Zetsu through the system at any time. He wouldn't have to worry about Black Zetsu secretly plotting against him without his knowledge.

Third, as a good person who valued family and enjoyed helping others, he found the story of the devoted son Black Zetsu rescuing his mother so touching! Watanabe Ichiro's conscience would never rest if he didn't lend a hand!

Finding a way to drag this master of hiding into the spotlight and make him the center of attention in the Shinobi World sounded entertaining just to think about.

It's decided. My next goal is to send Black Zetsu straight to the top of the Shinobi World's rankings!

Meanwhile, somewhere far away.

Black Zetsu: "Achoo! I feel like something nasty has its eye on me."

Step one of causing trouble: make a body.

The system offered two options: customize one himself, or spin a wheel.

There wasn't much to explain about customization. Just like starting a major online game, he could choose his family background, talents, appearance... but there was a pay-to-win element here. Better families, more handsome looks, and stronger talents all cost more points. Even with the beginner bonus, the best he could make was someone moderately above average.

The other option was spinning a wheel, which depended entirely on luck. The wheel had everything: items, ninjutsu, talents, alternate identities...

They were roughly divided into four tiers. The best was six-star rainbow gold, followed by five-star gold and four-star purple. Everything three-star and below was white.

There was a free beginner ten-pull with a guaranteed gold reward. How could he not give it a spin?

Watanabe Ichiro pressed the draw button, and golden light blazed.

White, white, white, gold, white, white, purple, white, white, white.

[Gold · True Damage Infusion] (Removable) (Non-transferable) Your attacks can deal true damage. This effect can be applied to weapons and objects. When applied, it manifests visually by turning the weapon black.

[Purple · Character Profile Card] Twins. If one dies, the surviving twin's talents, stamina, energy, and all other attributes double.

[White · Military Rations Pill] Restores a small amount of stamina and chakra. Watermelon flavor.

[White · Military Rations Pill] Restores a small amount of stamina and chakra. Banana flavor.

[White · Military Rations Pill] Restores a small amount of stamina and chakra. Orange flavor.

The drop rate for these Military Rations Pills was seriously high! His ten-pull had yielded only the guaranteed gold card and an ordinary purple card. Everything else was Military Rations Pills in assorted flavors.

Watanabe Ichiro put the Military Rations Pills into his system inventory, equipped [Gold · True Damage Infusion], and held the Character Profile Card in his hand for a closer look.

As a purple card, it didn't allow him to give the twins excessively powerful backgrounds or talents. Things like an Otsutsuki background or being Indra's reincarnation were off-limits, which made it somewhat underwhelming.

Still, that didn't mean he couldn't do something with it.

Watanabe Ichiro's gaze settled on the battlefield before him. After their fierce battle, the Senju Clan and the Uchiha Clan had each withdrawn their forces. Support personnel were either collecting or destroying the corpses strewn across the ground.

He drifted through both clans in his spirit form. Hashirama Senju and Madara Uchiha were still young, and the plot had yet to begin. According to the system, Black Zetsu was far away from here, doing who knew what.

Good, good. I've only got two cards in hand, but they're enough.

He would have to plan this carefully and make [Lord Black Zetsu]'s name ring out across the entire Shinobi World!