Drunkenness

After seeing the guests off, Liu Yuanzhou and the other two returned to the courtyard to clean up the remnants of the feast. Seeing Liu Yuanbo and the bride helping to clear the bowls and chopsticks as well, Zhang Shi went over, took her daughter-in-law's hand, and said, "Xiao Mei, go back to the cave dwelling and rest. We can handle these things." As she spoke, she called Liu Yuanbo over and told him to take the bride back to the cave dwelling.

By the time they had cleared away the bowls and chopsticks, gathered up the tables and chairs, and swept the courtyard, it was already late. The sun had set. Zhang Shi asked Liu Jiahong's family to stay for dinner. Liu Jiahong was Liu Da's younger brother, and he, his wife, and his two sons had been helping with the feast all day.

Once the meal was ready, everyone gathered around the table to eat. The dishes were all leftovers from the feast—fish, chicken, beef, roasted meat, everything—filling the large table to the brim. There were also white flour buns, and naturally, wine. Liu Yuanbo called everyone to sit down. Liu Yuanbo's wife, Li Shi, the bride from that day, brought out a large basin of millet porridge and served everyone a bowl. Having only just married into the family, she was still unfamiliar with everyone. Aside from greeting people, she hardly spoke on her own.

Liu Da and his younger brother Liu Jiahong ate and drank as they chatted about the day's wedding feast—how much gift money they had received, how much they had spent, and so on. Liu Yuanzhou, Liu Yuanhang, and the other younger ones kept their heads down and ate heartily. Though they had attended the feast at noon, faced with a table full of delicacies they might not get to eat even once or twice a year, none of them could ever feel they had had enough.

After dinner, friends from the village who were close to Liu Yuanbo came over to tease the bride and groom in their wedding chamber. Before long, a group of children came too. Zhang Shi had specially prepared wine and food for them, along with sunflower seeds, peanuts, and the like.

As his own brother, Liu Yuanzhou could hardly join in teasing his elder brother in the wedding chamber. He entered the cave dwelling where he lived and looked at its emptiness. Listening to the bursts of laughter and revelry outside, he unexpectedly felt a little melancholy. From now on, I'll be the only one living in this cave dwelling.

He lay on the kang, his head resting on his folded arms. Thinking back over everything that had happened that day, he grew irritated without realizing it. When will I be able to enter Bright Force and become a martial master? If I were a martial master, would Li Laocai still dare humiliate my family like this? If I were a martial master, I could openly go look for Er Ni. Why should I have to pine away by myself?

After letting his thoughts run wild for a while, he could no longer lie still. He got off the kang, went to the central cave dwelling to ask his mother Zhang Shi for some drinking snacks, then took two jars of wine and headed out. Zhang Shi assumed he was going to find Liu Chuang and the others, so she said nothing, only telling him to return early.

Carrying the wine and food, Liu Yuanzhou arrived at Third Master's home. Seeing light still shining through the window, he guessed Miss Qin had not yet gone to bed. He knocked softly on the door and said, "It's me, Liu Yuanzhou. I brought some wine and food over for you to try."

"Come in," Miss Qin answered.

Liu Yuanzhou opened the door and entered the cave dwelling. Miss Qin was mending clothes beneath an oil lamp, so he moved the lamp aside a little, set the wine and dishes on the kang table, and laid out the chopsticks and cups.

Miss Qin put down her work and smiled. "What brought you here to drink with me? Are things at home finished?"

"They were finished long ago. What did you eat tonight?"

"I heated up yesterday's leftover dishes and buns, then ate a little at random."

Liu Yuanzhou immediately felt bad and blamed himself somewhat. "It was my fault. I forgot to bring you something to eat."

Miss Qin smiled but said nothing.

Liu Yuanzhou poured the wine and said, "Have some food. This is cold pork jelly, this is vermicelli stew, and this is cold pork liver. Try them."

Miss Qin picked up her chopsticks and sampled each dish. Finding them fairly tasty, she took several more bites.

When Liu Yuanzhou saw that she had eaten some food, he raised a cup of wine. "You can drink, right? If not, just eat the dishes."

Miss Qin picked up her cup and drained it in one gulp. The wine was homemade corn liquor bought at the market. It was fiery going down, and she could not help frowning.

Liu Yuanzhou drained his cup as well.

Miss Qin then asked about the wedding procession and banquet that day. As a woman from the south, she was quite curious about northern wedding customs.

Liu Yuanzhou told her about everything that had happened during the wedding procession, except for the matter involving Li Laocai.

The two chatted as they drank, and before long, more than a dozen cups of wine had gone down their throats.

"I see your brows tightly knitted, as though something weighs on your mind. What is it? Your brother got married, yet you aren't happy?" Miss Qin suddenly asked.

"How could I not be happy that my brother got married?" Liu Yuanzhou asked in return. He took another sip of wine. Perhaps because he had been drinking, or perhaps because he believed that he and Miss Qin ultimately belonged to different worlds, he suddenly felt an overwhelming urge to confide in someone. Many words that had long been buried in his heart slipped out without his noticing.

"The reason I'm unhappy is that my family suffered a humiliation beyond all humiliation today, yet I could do nothing. Can you understand that feeling of helplessness?" Liu Yuanzhou buried his face in his hands.

Miss Qin sighed, and her heart felt strangely clogged. Softly, she said, "Come, I'll drink a cup with you."

After they drank, Miss Qin said again, "What exactly happened? Saying it aloud may make you feel better."

Liu Yuanzhou told Miss Qin how Li Laocai had blocked the road that day, how his father had swallowed humiliation and borne a heavy burden, and everything else. Hearing it, Miss Qin could not help developing hatred for that so-called Li Laocai.

"Do you want me to teach that Li Laocai a lesson?" Miss Qin suddenly said.

A warm current flowed through Liu Yuanzhou's heart. To have met Miss Qin, I must have been blessed for three lifetimes. He shook his head and sighed. "Could it be that I can't even beat an old man? I hate Li Laocai to death, but the person I truly hate even more is myself. I hate my own helplessness."

"Like that day at the market, when Fatty Wang humiliated me. If I had been strong enough, would he have dared?"

"And Er Ni—I want so badly to go into the city and find her. But in my current state, what could I do if I went? Even if I found her, what then?"

"So in truth, I've placed all my hopes on martial training. But after training for so long, my skills have barely improved at all. Do I lack talent, or have I simply not worked hard enough? Miss Qin, can you tell me?"

Liu Yuanzhou looked at Miss Qin. By then, tears were already streaming down his face.

Seeing Liu Yuanzhou's tear-streaked face and the pain he was in, Miss Qin felt a wrenching ache in her heart. Liu Yuanzhou's face gradually overlapped with a face from her memories. Without realizing it, she reached out and wiped away the tears on his face.

"If he were alive, he would be about your age too, wouldn't he?" Miss Qin murmured.

"What did you say?" Liu Yuanzhou asked through sobs.

Miss Qin's heart jolted, and clarity returned to her eyes. She withdrew her hand without a trace and sighed. "Nothing. I meant that martial training, especially Enter Samadhi, must be done slowly. The more impatient you are, the more it backfires."

"How could I not know that? But I just can't control the anxiety in my heart." Liu Yuanzhou gave a bitter laugh. He poured more wine, and the two drank slowly, neither saying a word for a while.

After another four or five cups, one jar of wine was nearly empty. Both of them had become somewhat drunk without realizing it.

Miss Qin's cheeks were flushed red. Propping her chin on both hands, she suddenly smiled. "Tell me about the Er Ni you mentioned earlier. Her name was Er Ni, right?"

Liu Yuanzhou leaned against the wooden chest behind him and smiled. "If you want to hear it, I'll tell you."

"My family lived quite close to Er Ni's. When we were little, we often played together. She was two years older than me."

"Later, as we grew older and gradually came to understand things, we played together less and less. Er Ni was truly beautiful after she grew up. Every time I saw her, I didn't even dare look at her directly. Heh heh."

"But that day, when I came back from gathering firewood, I ran into her carrying a huge basket of pig grass. She was struggling with it, so I helped carry it to her doorstep. Then she asked me to meet her at dusk in the willow forest behind the village, saying she had something delicious for me."

"That evening, in the willow forest, she came as promised. She wore a pale pink dress and looked beautiful beyond words. She took out a piece of pastry wrapped in a handkerchief and said her uncle had brought it back from the city. That pastry was so sweet and fragrant. I had never eaten anything so delicious."

"From then on, we had an unspoken understanding. Every two or three days, we would meet there, bring something to eat, and talk. Of course, sometimes we also went to that cave."

"Ah, on the eighth day of the fourth month this year, her whole family moved to the city. There has been no news of them ever since."

At this point, Liu Yuanzhou could not help letting out a long sigh. Miss Qin listened silently.

After finishing Er Ni's story, Liu Yuanzhou struggled over to the table, picked up the wine jar, and shook it. It was already empty. He said, "The wine is gone, and it's getting late. Let's call it a night." As he spoke, he began clearing the mess from the table. He truly was drunk. His body swayed this way and that, his chopsticks fell several times, and a dish nearly dropped onto the floor as well.

"Liu Yuanzhou, do you really want to become a martial master?" Miss Qin still propped her chin on both hands. She stared at Liu Yuanzhou, her eyes deep and unfathomable.

"Isn't that obvious? I dream about it every day." Liu Yuanzhou looked up at her.

Miss Qin stood and moved to Liu Yuanzhou's side. She took off a bead the size of a longan from around her neck. The bead was black and threaded on a string. She said, "Look at this bead. It can change your fate."

Liu Yuanzhou merely assumed she was joking in her drunkenness, so he stopped what he was doing and looked at the bead.

The bead swayed back and forth, and Liu Yuanzhou's eyes followed it without realizing it.

"Empty your mind. Recite after me: Heaven and earth, dark and yellow; the universe, vast and wild. The bead is called Xuanming, its light shines upon this small chamber, washing away my stubborn filth; heaven's light, clear and pure..." Miss Qin's voice drifted over, faint and ethereal.

Liu Yuanzhou did as she said. He only felt that the bead before his eyes grew larger and larger, closer and closer. In the end, the entire world was filled with that bead. At last, he felt himself sink into a stretch of darkness, even every sound drifting away from him. He suddenly began to feel afraid.

Then, all at once, a sheet of light exploded forth, as if the sun itself had burst apart. Then that light swallowed him whole.