This House Was a Little Noisy

The commotion by the river continued. More than a dozen constables arrived from various places and used pleasure boats to salvage the carriage from the water.

Fortunately, the inner river was not particularly deep. The two fine horses were unharmed, but the carriage itself was wrecked.

Countless scholars and commoners crowded around to watch, blocking the street so tightly that not a drop of water could get through. On a nearby side street stood three figures, with the property broker and the constable calling in every direction:

"Young Master Xie?"

"Xie Jinhuan? Xie Jinhuan? Where are you?"

"He hasn't run off, has he?"

Seeing no trace of Xie Jinhuan, Constable Xiao Wang grew nervous and wondered whether he should hurry back to report it.

Fortunately, they had not been calling long before a figure leaped off a rooftop and landed before the three of them.

"Sorry, I went to watch the excitement."

Seeing the man and his bird return, Wang breathed a sigh of relief.

The broker hurried forward.

"Young man, I told you to wait here. Why did you go wandering off? Steward Hou took time out of his busy schedule to come here. You can't afford to waste his time."

"My apologies. Steward Hou, please... er..."

Having gotten himself entangled with an all-powerful succubus, Xie Jinhuan was hardly in a promising situation. His mind was a jumble, and he had not paid much attention. Only when he looked up did he discover, to his astonishment, that Steward Hou, standing in the street, looked spectacularly unconventional!

He was at most five feet three, skinny as a monkey, holding a white paper fan and wearing a black jacket. As if his shifty eyes, pointed mouth, and monkey cheeks were not enough, he also sported two little wisps of mustache.

If that sixteen-foot succubus earlier had been the ceiling of beauty, this steward was unquestionably the gutter oil of looks. They went in opposite directions, but it really was hard to say which was more extreme!

Even with his strong nerves, Xie Jinhuan was stunned. He put even that earth-shaking succubus aside for the moment and looked the man over, wondering whether he had accidentally transmigrated into Underground Transportation Station.

Perched on his shoulder, Coal Ball also gaped at the man, beak open and eyes round. The look probably meant-could this be a monkey spirit?

Steward Hou gently waved his folding fan, seemingly accustomed to his own terrifying presence, and said impatiently:

"You're the one looking to rent a house? The Commandery Princess's Manor has plenty of properties. What sort do you want?"

The only commandery princess with her own estate in Danyang was Commandery Princess Changning, who held a Principal Second Rank title and was the Prince of Dan's eldest legitimate daughter. Xie Jinhuan had not expected his landlady to have such an illustrious background, or her steward to be quite so outrageous. He first suppressed his distracting thoughts.

"I'll only be staying a while. Somewhere to settle down will do, preferably in Clear Spring Lane."

With a bunch of keys hanging at his waist, Steward Hou waved his fan and led the way.

"Clear Spring Lane is a fine spot. Step out of the lane and you're in Peach Immortal Ward, where every inch of land is worth its weight in gold. Food, drink, entertainment—it's all convenient. There's even a Flower Tower Street. The girls there are so fresh and lovely, tsk, tsk..."

Flower Tower Street...

Xie Jinhuan remembered the bandits' conversation again, but he really was in no mood to see foreign dancing girls now. He asked:

"How much is the rent?"

"Fifty taels a month for the smallest single-courtyard house. One month's deposit and three months up front."

Fifty taels?!

Xie Jinhuan stopped short, stunned.

Although he had never worked before, he was not ignorant of prices.

His father, an eighth-rank county commandant, earned only fifteen taels a month, plus a little grain, firewood, and cloth.

Fifty taels in monthly rent was roughly three months of his father's income. With one month's deposit and three up front, that came to two hundred taels.

That rent rivaled a mansion beside the imperial city!

At that thought, Xie Jinhuan took the money pouch the monk had donated from his waist and checked it.

Inside were bits of silver, copper coins, and an official banknote. All told, it amounted to less than thirty taels...

Discovering that killing three people had not even scraped together a month's rent, Xie Jinhuan could not help being shocked by Danyang's housing prices. He put the pouch away and asked:

"Does County Commandant Yang live here too?"

Steward Hou pointed his folding fan at two lit lanterns deep in the lane.

"Right there. County Commandant Yang is an old hand at the yamen. The Prince's Manor assigned him that house, so he pays no rent. You're different. You don't seem to have brought enough traveling money, lad. I happen to have a large two-courtyard house that's a little noisy and hasn't found a tenant. If you don't mind, I'll let you have it for twenty taels, no deposit, paid monthly."

Twenty taels was plainly no small sum either. Xie Jinhuan had chosen to rent nearby because his traveling funds were limited. As things stood, he would have been better off at an inn; twenty taels would cover a month or so.

Constable Xiao Wang, accompanying them, understood that the rent was excessively high and helpfully spoke up:

"Young Master Xie is only passing through and helping the yamen with a case. He won't be staying many days. Could you make an exception and lower the rent, Steward Hou?"

Steward Hou said impatiently, "Two taels at the lowest. Not a coin less."

"Chirp?"

All three staggered at his words. Even Coal Ball was dumbfounded!

The price had already been slashed to the bone, and now he was taking another ninety percent off. How was that different from giving it away?

Had the entire household been executed?

Or did a downpour outside mean a drizzle indoors?

Full of suspicion, Xie Jinhuan followed Steward Hou down the lane. Soon, a residence with white walls and blue tiles appeared before them.

The residence was very new. Stone drums carved with auspicious beasts flanked two white stone steps, and the heavy black-lacquered gates bore a brass lock.

When the gates opened, a spacious front courtyard came into view. A white stone path ran down the middle, with stables, a kitchen, guest rooms, and a tea room on either side. Straight ahead was a moon gate set in a white wall capped with blue tiles, through which they could see an elegant rear courtyard.

The entire residence was roofed in blue glazed tiles. Its carved beams and painted decorations were elegant and imposing, and even the paving stones had been chosen with care. Apart from a few fallen leaves, there was nothing to fault.

Xie Jinhuan was no stranger to the world. One look at the kitchen walls told him the house was brand-new; no one had even lit the stove.

"Steward Hou, are you sure the monthly rent is two taels?!"

Steward Hou frowned. "Still too expensive? I can knock off another three mace at most. Take it or leave it..."

You can go even lower?!

Xie Jinhuan knew cheap goods were never good, but he really could not imagine what loss he might suffer. He entered the courtyard and looked around.

"What's noisy about this house? Does it have invisible guests?"

"Nothing like that."

Steward Hou was perfectly frank, gesturing behind them with his folding fan.

"Right behind the main house is the Commandery Princess's Manor's Martial Might Pavilion. Her Highness often holds banquets there at night, so some music and noise are unavoidable. If you can accept that, rent it."

Xie Jinhuan did not believe a word.

However noisy his landlady was, she could not possibly throw banquets every day. Besides, it was only people exchanging toasts. How loud could that get?

Such a huge mansion, for only one tael and seven mace a month...

There must be invisible A Piao...

Xie Jinhuan happened to have a female ghost with him. If this really was a haunted house, it would provide better cover. After some thought, he took out a handful of silver.

"All right, I'll take it."

"Decisive."

Steward Hou produced a rental agreement. Once Xie Jinhuan had signed, he took it back to inspect it, narrowing his shifty eyes slightly.

"Well, now~ Fine handwriting."

Xie Jinhuan had known from childhood that he needed to win at the starting line. How could he neglect handwriting, which was his calling card? He had begun copying renowned calligraphers' model books at three, and even wrote his father's official documents for him.

Faced with the compliment, Xie Jinhuan was about to be modest, only for Steward Hou to continue:

"That settles my New Year couplets. Don't end your lease too early, lad. Best leave after the New Year."

"?"

Xie Jinhuan could not be bothered to respond.

Before long, Steward Hou, the broker, and the constable left one after another, closing the gates on their way out.

Click~

The two-courtyard residence fell completely quiet, with only the rustling of bamboo leaves in the wind.

Rustle, rustle~

Standing alone in the courtyard, Xie Jinhuan headed to the rear residence with Coal Ball hopping about everywhere, searching for any A Piao that might be present.

The rear residence consisted of the main house and east and west wings. The master bedroom was quite spacious, with a redwood canopy bed big enough for four or five people to play poker together without feeling cramped. There were no quilts or pillows, though, only a bed frame.

Finding nothing unclean, Xie Jinhuan grew even more puzzled. Since he already had an enormous A Piao beside him, he could not be bothered to keep looking. He lay back on the bed boards and pondered what to do next.

He could not break the Soul-Locking Curse himself, nor could he have someone examine his head. The moment they asked about the cause, he would be exposed...

Nightly Great Succubus was alive. He dared not casually discard the sword, nor did he dare keep digging the grave.

The only thing he could do now was climb to the first rank as quickly as possible and bury that grand lady again.

As for his father's whereabouts, he could only investigate once he left Danyang alive...

With my measly strength, what madness possessed me to dig up the Demon-Suppressing Mausoleum?

While he was regretting his past actions, before he had fully sorted out his thoughts, the drawback Steward Hou had mentioned suddenly revealed itself:

"Clang, clang, clang~..."

"Dreams shattered in Mount Wu's cloud-and-rain curtains~ Cold crept through the emerald quilt; alone, I lay fully clothed~..."

As the night deepened, the sound of a pipa and a songstress's melody suddenly came from behind the Main Room. Judging by its source, it was on the second floor, diagonally above his bedroom.

The pipa was quite pleasant, and the singer's sweet voice was wonderfully lilting.

At first, Xie Jinhuan even thought this was a perk. Before long, however, the pipa was drowned out by a twittering chorus of women:

"You little hussy, are you cheating?"

"Eight sixes!"

"Why hasn't Qingmo come?"

"She said she wasn't feeling well and is resting in her room."

"Oh~..."

Rattle, rattle...

Clink, clatter...

There were rattling dice, running footsteps, women's bashful scoldings, and even crisp slapping sounds that sounded positively springy.

Bewildered by the noise, Xie Jinhuan turned to look behind him and thought:

Is the Commandery Princess's Manor having an orgy?

But those voices are all women. Sounds more like a lesbian party.

I've long heard the Capital City's wealthy ladies get up to all sorts of things. Are Danyang's girls this wild too?

Xie Jinhuan's brow furrowed. Figuring the banquet would end in two hours or so at most, he paid it little mind and prepared to sleep awhile.

But the master bedroom's rear wall seemed to be less than five meters from the Commandery Princess's Manor's banquet hall. After a short spell of commotion, a thunderclap suddenly rang out:

Bang-

It sounded like a firearm, deafeningly loud.

Lying beside him, Coal Ball puffed up in fright on the spot, jumped up, and spun a hundred and eighty degrees to stare at the roof, eyes terrified.

"Cheep-?!"

Xie Jinhuan also jolted awake and seized the Heavenly Gang Mace, only to hear a group of women chirping their praise:

"Your Highness, what a fine shot!"

"Again, again..."

Then firecrackers began going off nearby, just like New Year's Eve.

Bang, bang, bang...

Xie Jinhuan's face darkened. He suddenly understood why this house was renting for the price of cabbage.

Who the hell could live here?!

Even a Nian beast would have its fur scared straight up...

Xie Jinhuan felt he was still too young. Cheap goods really were no good. Brow tightly furrowed, he forced himself to endure it.

A moment later, however, he suddenly realized the noise had vanished again. The room fell deathly silent.

*?*

Xie Jinhuan froze and opened his eyes to look around, only to discover in astonishment that a woman had appeared beside him!

Wearing a red wedding gown and about his height, she lay right beside him, her face white as paper and her tongue hanging out, like the ghost of someone who had hanged herself!