The king dreamed, the goddess loved; my heart was stirred

A composed woman said, "The most pitiable of all is our younger sister Mingzhu of Iron Pear Mountain Manor. She was a close friend of Lotus Fairy Nan Xinlan, and when she heard the terrible news, indignation filled her heart. She went to seek revenge, and now there has been no word of her for days. If she too has fallen into that lecher White Chrysanthemum's hands, who knows how he will defile her?"

"Master sent us down the mountain to slay this lecher. If we sisters run into him, we'll skin him and pound his bones, and make him regret ever coming into this world."

The more the women talked, the more furious they grew, and the more savage their words became. Wang Chong listened with his heart pounding and his courage quaking; even the hot bathwater no longer felt comfortable. He hurriedly finished washing and changed into his newly bought scholar's robes. Rather than eat immediately, he took out the rouge and face powder. Once, to accompany his seventh ex-girlfriend to a comic convention in cosplay, he had been forced to learn a trick or two of Asia's foremost dark art.

Wang Chong first changed his hairstyle, replacing his warrior's topknot with a scholar's, then applied some makeup and added eyeshadow, making his complexion look all the paler. He looked like a pallid pretty boy with weak blood and Qi who spent his days poring over poetry and books. Though his makeup skills were mediocre, in an ancient society like this they could already be called divine. Once he had finished, he looked like an entirely different person.

He had originally wanted to disguise himself as a one-eyed man, but that was no longer convenient. After all, if someone with bright, piercing eyes checked in and a fierce one-eyed brute came out, anyone would suspect something was wrong. As for growing a beard or tanning his skin, those were out of the question; there was not enough time. He could only make these hasty adjustments, aiming chiefly to look familiar to the innkeeper but unfamiliar to everyone else.

He then circulated his internal power again, rubbed his original body's clothes to shreds, and tossed them all beneath the bed.

After a full day's travel, Wang Chong was a little hungry. Having finished these miscellaneous tasks, he was eating with his head down when he heard a woman's voice ask softly from outside the courtyard, "Are you here, young master?"

Forcing himself to remain calm, he called, "I am an upright gentleman. Please leave, miss."

A woman chuckled outside the door. Like butterflies fluttering and colorful wings taking flight, several women vaulted over the wall one after another and landed in the courtyard. Every one of them was exceedingly beautiful, like a heavenly fairy banished to the mortal world.

Wang Chong put on a frightened expression and cried, "Are you mountain spirits who have cultivated enough power to abduct handsome men? I have long studied poetry and books, and within my breast dwells a mighty, righteous spirit. I shall never allow you fiends near me!"

The women doubled over with laughter, giggling merrily. The most gallant-looking among them, a tall woman whose eyebrows swept into her temples, said, "We are cultivators from Mount Qingcheng, not mountain spirits or tree ghosts. We have only come to ask a few questions."

Beside her, the youngest, a girl in pink of no more than thirteen or fourteen, said, "Second senior sister, this frail young gentleman doesn't look like a lecher."

Wang Chong feigned a sudden rage and shouted, "I am an upright gentleman, well versed in poetry and books! How dare you insult me by calling me a lecher? Such a disgrace to refinement, such a disgrace!"

The tall, gallant-looking second senior sister, whose eyebrows swept into her temples, gave an exceedingly gentle smile and said, "On our master's orders, we are pursuing the lecher White Chrysanthemum. If you are not he, we sisters will gladly apologize."

"Of course I am not!" Wang Chong cried. "Do not repeat such words that sully my reputation. Do not repeat them!"

The pink-clad girl's eyes shifted slightly, and she said, "You call yourself a scholar, young master, so let me test you. If you can compose a poem about our visit, we'll believe you aren't the lecher, and gladly pour you tea in apology."

Wang Chong wore an indignant expression, but his mind was pondering which poem would suit the occasion for him to copy.

His thoughts raced, and he promptly recited:

"On the third day of the third month, the weather is fresh; many fair ladies scale the wall into the garden.

Their bearing rich, their thoughts far-reaching, gentle and true; their skin delicate, their flesh and bones well proportioned.

Embroidered silken robes brighten late spring, with peacocks in gathered gold and qilin in silver.

What adorns their heads? Kingfisher-green ornaments hang beside their temples and lips.

What is seen upon their backs? Pearls weigh down their waistbands, fitting their figures snugly."

After pondering a moment, he offered another: "On the mountain of nine spirits and supreme wonder, dwelling in Kunlun's gardens, stands a city a thousand li across, with twelve jade towers, gates of precious blossom, halls of lustrous emerald, nine-tiered mysterious chambers, and purple-green cinnabar rooms. The Jasper Pool girds its left, emerald waters encircle its right. There is a heavenly maiden, born amid glaciers, who soars in flight, the essence of utmost yin, her station matched to the west..."

The women watched this man, his face filled with flustered indignation, yet the verses he recited floated beyond the dust of the mortal world. They had never heard them before, and the language was magnificent. Only... every one petered out unfinished.

The youngest girl in pink asked with innocent charm, "Your verses are indeed extraordinary, young master, but why are they incomplete?"

Wang Chong said resentfully, "Composing poetry is an elegant pursuit. In such straits, how could I be in the mood? I merely threw together a few lines to satisfy you."

"Does this now establish that I am a scholar?"

"Surely that lecher could never possess such literary talent."

The women exchanged glances, immediately believing him eight or nine tenths. They had heard from the innkeeper that a lone man occupied the neighboring courtyard, and had come to inquire for fear of missing the lecher. They belonged to the Qingcheng Sect. Before taking religious vows, their master, the Red-Sleeved Divine Nun, had been a renowned talented woman, and the disciples she taught were accomplished in both letters and martial arts. In particular, their second senior sister, the Purple-Green Jade Maiden Chu Qiuzi, excelled at elegant writing, with poetry and prose her greatest strengths. Her reputation as a talented woman had spread throughout the land, and she had once defeated dozens of scholars in a poetry contest on the Lijiang River. They could all appreciate the excellence of these verses Wang Chong had "composed," and were utterly won over. Especially since he claimed to have thrown them together in distress, the achievement was all the more remarkable.

Chu Qiuzi led her junior sisters in a graceful bow and said softly, "Chu Qiuzi of Qingcheng and her junior sisters apologize to you, young master."

Wang Chong secretly wiped away his sweat and said airily, "There is no need to apologize. You need only withdraw."

Yet Chu Qiuzi did not leave. A faint spring blush touched her jade-like face as she said, "These verses of yours are of the highest order, young master. When might you complete them, so that we sisters can hear them in full?"

Wang Chong gave a dry chuckle. "I'm not in the mood. I can't finish them."

He paused, then said, "But I do have another that may be called complete. I'll give it to you."

"A light silk fan, a white orchid; a slender waist, a jade sash, dancing heavenly gauze. I thought a fairy had just scaled the wall, till she glanced back smiling-a she-devil."

Having recited the poem, Wang Chong swept his broad sleeves, returned to his room, and barred the door, thinking, If these women fly into a rage, I may have a fight on my hands. Honestly, why did I have to mock them at the end? I had already covered everything up.

Hearing the first two lines, the youngest girl in pink had been lost in pleasant reverie. At "she glanced back smiling-a she-devil," she burst out laughing, then realized something was wrong: he was plainly mocking them sisters. Indignantly, she said, "That pedantic young gentleman actually slandered us as she-devils."

Chu Qiuzi, however, was not angry. She gazed lingeringly at the door and said, "Let's go! Don't make ourselves any more unwelcome."

This time, the senior and junior sisters did not scale the wall. They pushed open the courtyard gate and filed out, like a band of fairies returning from a garden outing after enjoying themselves to the full.

Wang Chong waited a long while, then peered through the crack in the door. Seeing that no one had come to call him to account, he let out a great breath of relief. He went to bed, but tossed and turned, unable to sleep, and began pondering the martial arts he possessed once again.

...Wang Chong: Toad, give me a hint ahead of time. Am I actually a lecher or not?...

...Chu Qiuzi: The king dreamed, the goddess loved; my heart was stirred...