Lucas nodded. "Anything else you want to make up? Tell me all of it, and then, depending on how entertaining the story is, I'll decide whether to throw Vought a bone and give it a chance to fulfill its ambitions."
"What did you say?" Ashley had not expected Lucas to say that, and her voice rose considerably.
"Perhaps you could have Soldier Boy call me right now and explain it himself," Lucas said mockingly. He had long wanted to meet this veteran from the last century.
After much hesitation, Ashley chose a compromise: having the relatively more reliable Homelander explain.
Lucas insisted on making the call from his own phone, so he asked for the number.
After a few rings, the call connected.
Unexpectedly, Soldier Boy's voice came from the other end. "Hello? Homelander's not here. Which pussy is this?"
Lucas glanced at Ashley in disbelief. "Are you sure you gave me the right number?"
Since the phone was on speaker, Ashley had also heard the voice on the other end. After a long, awkward moment, she braced herself and shook her head.
Lucas said nothing for a long while, recognizing Soldier Boy's voice. At that moment, time seemed to stand still, with only the occasional swallows flitting past the window seeming to prove that everything was still moving.
"This is Lucas," he said, losing his patience.
"What kind of shitty name is that? Sounds like a stray dog. Call back later."
Even his name had come under attack. Lucas's expression darkened further, and he spoke almost one word at a time. "Listen carefully, Soldier Boy. I am the president."
"If you're the president, then I'm the president of planet Earth. Try making another scam call, and I'll be knocking on your door within half an hour." Soldier Boy hung