Toilet paper

What were the three essentials for a transmigrator?

Soap, glass, and papermaking.

Westeros already had soap. Even sellswords could afford it.

Glass?!

The glass windows in the Red Keep were already beautiful enough.

Papermaking?

The Citadel held the knowledge of papermaking. Paper was expensive, usually made by stretching out a sheepskin, scraping it flat, and trimming it fine, a time-consuming process.

And so!

"Beloved of the gods," Baelon, the prince of prophecy, received knowledge bestowed by the Crone through his extraordinary prophetic dreams.

He naturally came to understand how to turn waste into treasure.

How to make paper from reeds, wheat stalks, scraps of linen, and old fishing nets.

There were many kinds of paper, too.

After personally investigating conditions in Westeros and its literacy rate, Baelon cheerfully decided that he would make toilet paper!

There was no helping it. Westeros had an appallingly low literacy rate.

Even the great lord of the Stormlands, the newly appointed Duke Beaumont Baratheon, could not read a single word.

He relied entirely on the maester at his side to read the letters brought by ravens.

And when it came to cleaning their backsides, the people of Westeros had very limited options.

Westerosi commoners had moss, leaves, and straw. The nobility had little better.

Baelon truly could not stand those scraps of satin that, once smeared with shit, were left piled in wooden buckets to ferment for days before the maids washed them all together.

Then they were shared around and used again!

Who the fuck knew whose yellowish-brown shit was still lurking in the depths of that tightly woven fabric-

That scrap of satin touching his fingers and asshole!

"Urgh... cough, cough!"

Having nearly made himself vomit with those memories, Baelon hastily shook his head and selectively blurred out the unbearable recollections.

A row of square, red-brick factory buildings stood along the Blackwater Rush.

In front of the broad plaza of hard-packed earth.

Three people in black, red, and green woolen uniforms stood at the junction, looking out.

The one in black was Bodo, the toilet paper factory's steward, wearing a golden reed-flower brooch.

The man in red wore a brooch set with a red garnet, representing the brickworks.

The man in green wore a bouquet brooch.

Thirty or forty raggedly dressed people stood in the plaza. Some had bundles of reeds by their feet, while some children held tattered linen and fishing nets.

At the front of the line, several purchasing clerks in plain black clothes were quickly weighing reeds and handing out copper coins.

The people stood in line, watching the three distinguished stewards curiously.

What was special about today? Why had they all come out to the junction?!

Their curiosity was soon satisfied.

Prince Baelon had arrived. No wonder!

As soon as Baelon stepped out of his carriage, the three men who had been waiting so long immediately trotted forward, grinning to reveal blood-red teeth.

"Prince Baelon!"

"We'll visit the paper mill first. Bodo, spare me the pleasantries!" Baelon smiled in response to the commoners greeting him enthusiastically in the plaza as he strode into the red-brick paper mill.

"How have toilet paper sales and raw material purchases been this quarter?"

"And how are the thirty-five workers in the factory doing?"

Bodo brought over a ledger he had prepared in advance and reported animatedly, "My prince, ninety-six houses across the Seven Kingdoms purchased drag... toilet paper this quarter!"

Baelon nodded, unsurprised.

Nobles liked to distinguish themselves from commoners and display their noble status in all sorts of ways.

He picked up a roll of yellowish, coarse toilet paper, its surface covered with fibers of varying thickness.

This was not the soft, snow-white toilet paper Baelon remembered from his previous life. It was more like thicker yellow paper.

Before using it, you even had to rub it between your hands a few times to soften it.

But compared with shared silk and linen, this portable, disposable toilet paper perfectly suited the nobles' tastes.

And Baelon knew how to capitalize on popularity!

He branded the toilet paper with Valyria's name.

Valyria was to this continent what ancient Rome was to Europe: a genuine top-tier sensation, a hugely popular brand that could sell products.

The Targaryens were of Valyrian blood. No one had a more legitimate claim to capitalize on its popularity.

Riding the popularity of the continent's biggest name, combined with its own practicality, toilet paper sold not only throughout Westeros but also to many countries overseas.

No noble who had used disposable toilet paper would ever willingly go back to sharing linen with others to wipe their backside.

Not only were all the nobles of any standing in the Seven Kingdoms scrambling to buy it, but a toilet paper craze had swept as far south as Dorne and as far away as the Free Cities across the Narrow Sea.

The establishment of the toilet paper factory and the growth in export trade not only brought the Targaryens a steady stream of gold dragons, but also stabilized public order in King's Landing.

Driven by toilet paper, ships came and went through King's Landing's harbor. Many street-side shops saw their incomes rise, and the poor could make a living at the docks by unloading and carrying cargo.

Bodo spoke as though seeking praise. "My prince, one of the workers discovered that adding a little less reed makes the paper tougher."

"And lately, quite a few refugees from who knows where, along with young people from nearby villages, have been going into the reed beds to cut reeds."

"The reeds we've purchased have started piling up in the warehouse." He asked tentatively, "Do you think we should limit purchases?"

"Make some of the new paper for me to inspect. If it passes, follow our usual innovation reward policy and give that worker three gold dragons," Baelon said.

"As for buying reeds?" He shook his head without hesitation. "No. Keep buying!"

King's Landing was a great city of five hundred thousand people. Some of the strong and able could find work carrying cargo at the docks, and his factories provided a small number of jobs.

But there were still far too many unemployed people left over.

Whether to play the "My King's Landing" simulation game well or for his own safety, he had to find them a way to make a living.

So Baelon simply outsourced raw material procurement to the people of King's Landing.

Go and get to work, all of you!

Cut reeds, collect scraps, and trade them for a better life!

Hope was the most formidable thing. Once people had something to look forward to and hope for, even an illusory hope, they could endure anything.

Once the unemployed had work and income and had tasted a stable life, they would no longer dare take risks.

"But lately, quite a few houses have offered suggestions about the toilet paper. They hope to have their house sigils printed on it, and they're willing to pay more for that."

Baelon nodded. "That's fine."

Why turn down gold dragons?

Bodo: !

He actually agreed?!

If they painted the sigils on, wouldn't that leave their backsides covered in color?!

But if Prince Baelon had agreed, he must have his reasons!

Bodo thought that perhaps this was what noble taste meant. He still had so much to learn.

Without hesitation, he said, "I'll immediately have people buy pigments and find painters. We'll produce a batch of house-sigil paper before the next quarter!"

Baelon: ?

Pigments?

An image surfaced in his mind of Beaumont Baratheon yanking down his trousers, showing off his yellow backside, and laughing wildly in a storm.

Baelon: ...

Unable to accept that, he proposed embossing instead. "Don't use pigments. Hammer dots into a sheet of iron to form the house sigil, then press it onto the paper."

"Try making a batch and give it to those houses for free. See whether they're willing to pay extra for it!"

"Hmm..."

He pondered for a moment. But what if the nobles liked their house sigils in their original colors?

He issued an important instruction. "Buy the best pigments you can."

He did not want the Targaryens sporting red or black backsides.

And treating them as a fashion trend among the nobles of Westeros!