Fortunately, Su Mian was quick enough to notice that Duan Xuanyu was about to do something reckless.
She hurriedly kicked Lin Xi away and stepped in front of Duan Xuanyu.
By then, staff had also come over to inspect the light fixture, and the venue manager came to apologize again.
Amid the chaos, no one noticed Su Mian pulling Duan Xuanyu into a corner again.
"Don't do anything reckless! Killing people at will is against the law here!"
Duan Xuanyu was seething. "I am the Son of Heaven! He offended my empress. I can exterminate nine generations of his clan!"
Su Mian took a deep breath.
It's okay, it's okay. I did wrong him by using him to get home back in ancient times.
So, now that he had this rare chance to study abroad in the modern world, she could teach him about modern culture and knowledge.
She could let him take it back to build up Great Liang, clear his reputation as a tyrant, and help him achieve great things. She would count it as repaying her emotional debt!
She thought over their upcoming schedule. After today's icebreaker filming ended, they would all set off together tomorrow to film on an island.
So she still had tonight to give Duan Xuanyu a proper introduction to the modern world.
She pacified him first. "If you don't behave, I'm not going back with you."
Duan Xuanyu choked on his words and shut his mouth, looking thoroughly unconvinced.
Soon, the host announced the results.
When time ran out, no one in Cheng Qin's group had completed the task.
So, in the end, only Su Mian and Duan Xuanyu won any prize money.
This would become their first funds for living on the island.
After filming ended, Su Mian hurriedly took Duan Xuanyu away.
She brought him to where she lived, searched for an educational video titled "Understand History in Just Thirty Minutes," and gave it to Duan Xuanyu to watch.
Thirty minutes later.
Duan Xuanyu looked utterly bewildered. "So this is thirteen hundred years after Northern Liang?"
"Yes." Su Mian nodded.
Northern Liang was not a fictional setting. It had actually existed in this world's history.
Duan Xuanyu pointed at the phone. "The little man trapped in this box is falsely accusing me! I never did any of the things he mentioned!"
Su Mian had spent time with him and knew he could be ruthless and decisive in certain matters, but he could never have been a tyrant who slaughtered people like mowing down hemp.
Something must have gone wrong somewhere.
"I don't know why history recorded you that way either."
"Also, this little box is called a phone. There isn't anyone trapped inside..."
"I'll find a few more books to take to the island. During these next few days on the dating show, just find somewhere to read."
Su Mian immediately went to look.
Duan Xuanyu still only half understood many things.
But he had already learned how advanced and developed this era was.
He had always wondered why his empress knew so much. Now he understood.
He looked up at Su Mian. "So your homeland is this wonderful."
Su Mian paused, then went back to packing.
"Actually, this isn't really my true homeland either..."
At the thought that she also needed to grind his disgust points, Su Mian suddenly felt an urge to tell him everything.
She put down the books, walked over to sit in front of Duan Xuanyu, and looked earnestly into his eyes.
"Duan Xuanyu, the truth is, I never really loved you."
"Everything I did for you in Northern Liang was to earn your affection so I could go home."
"I don't want to be an empress, and I don't want to be a celebrity either. I just want to go back to my real home and be an ordinary office clerk working nine to five."
"Do you understand?"
Their eyes met for a long time.
Duan Xuanyu wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her into his embrace. "No. If you didn't love me, why would you have done so much for me?"
Su Mian: "..."
Forget it. There are still several episodes of this dating show left anyway.
There'll be plenty of chances to reveal my true colors! I'll slowly make him loathe me!
Right, I can start revealing them now!
Su Mian pushed him away, sat straight down on the sofa, and crossed one leg over the other.
"Go get me a glass of water!"
The modern world really is better. Back in feudal times, how would I have dared speak to the emperor like this?
Duan Xuanyu had not expected his empress to have such a lively, interesting side beneath her gentle grace either.
The corners of his eyes curved without his noticing, and he immediately got off the sofa to pour her some water.
Su Mian looked down at her phone and searched for news about today's dating show.
Sure enough, everyone was calling her a gold digger and praising Fang Nuonuo for being understanding.
Tsk. I refuse to believe Fang Nuonuo doesn't have someone pulling strings behind her!
For all I know, she wrote that viral post insulting the original owner herself!
Suddenly, a glass of water was held out before her.
Su Mian took it.
Just as she was about to bring it to her lips, a sharp, strange smell hit her...
"Where did you get this water?"
"Over there." Duan Xuanyu pointed toward the bathroom. "From a white vat."
"..."
It's okay, it's okay. One day as husband and wife brings a hundred days of affection!
Then she spent another hour explaining what everything in the house was called and how to use it.
She also needed to give him some understanding of the world outside.
She took him out to buy modern clothes and get a haircut.
Buying clothes went fairly smoothly.
However, since the original owner had only a thousand yuan in savings to her name, she could only buy discounted items at shops that were cheap to begin with.
Fortunately, Duan Xuanyu had a good figure. He was a walking clothes hanger who would look good even in a sack.
When it came to his haircut, they could not afford a salon in the mall either.
They could only go to a little roadside shop that charged thirty yuan a cut.
To her surprise, Duan Xuanyu actually started making a fuss now.
"My body, hair, and skin were bestowed upon me by my parents. Absolutely not!"
"If you don't cut it, I'm not going back with you."
"..." Fine. Hair could grow back, but if he lost his empress, she would be gone.
One of his imperial uncles had even shaved his head when he became a monk, and it had grown back afterward.
So Duan Xuanyu had no choice but to get a modern man's haircut.
Su Mian stood outside the shop, enjoying the breeze.
A snide voice suddenly sounded behind her.
"Su Mian, did you deliberately wait somewhere you knew I'd pass?"
It was that dumbass Lu Zhou.
Su Mian was too tired today and had no intention of wasting her breath.
Unexpectedly, Lu Zhou suddenly lowered his head and leaned toward her. "Have you realized what you did wrong?"
Su Mian said, "...I've realized which is worth more: LV or love."
"You're still such a gold digger." Lu Zhou took a deep breath. "But even though you're so despicable, I still have to admit that I once loved you."
Su Mian said, "Even though you look like a piece of shit, I have to admit that I once shat you out."
"..." Lu Zhou gritted his teeth in fury. "Money! All you know is money! Don't even dream of getting back together with me for the rest of your life!"
Su Mian remained composed. "Oh, you're mad. You're mad."
Lu Zhou truly had nothing left to say. He turned and left in a fury.
A woman with eyes but no vision. You have no idea what you've missed out on!
You'll regret it sooner or later!
Su Mian waved at his retreating back.
"Rest in peace!"
Sooner or later, she would settle the score over Lu Zhou pretending to be poor and sponging off the original owner for three years.
These days, anyone with even the slightest connection to show business would make a PowerPoint exposing their ex after a breakup.
She had not done it yet because she did not have enough influence.
Once this dating show had trended a few times and she was a little more famous, exposing him would have the best effect.
As she was thinking this, Duan Xuanyu emerged from the barbershop.
He also looked in the direction Lu Zhou had gone. "My empress, who was that? Why were you arguing with him?"
Su Mian turned to look at him, and her eyes lit up.
A well-cut white shirt and neat, crisp short hair. He looked fresh and handsome!
A tyrant's radical makeover into an innocent college boy!
Su Mian was impressed by her own styling talent. She truly lived up to being a veteran Love Nikki player.
She turned back and answered his earlier question. "A scammer. He cheated me out of quite a lot of money before."
Duan Xuanyu said, "Did you report him to the authorities? Get it back."
Su Mian said, "I did. It's complicated. I couldn't get it back."
Duan Xuanyu could not understand. "In Northern Liang, anyone who swindles a woman out of her money must not only return it but also be flogged. A man who embezzles his wife's dowry is exiled as well... Your world is so advanced and civilized. Why won't the authorities stand up for you?"
"..." Good question!
Duan Xuanyu smiled faintly and rubbed the top of her head. "No matter. If the authorities won't uphold justice for you, I'll stand up for you."