Simulated Star Rail: Ruin Mei's Lifelong Regret from the Start
Chapter 20

Questioning the Heart

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"Who are you?"

Bai Heng stood with sword in hand amid the rain of blood, yet the torrential downpour, thick with blood, merely passed through his body without affecting him in the slightest.

Clearly, this was only an illusion.

Or rather, this had originally been his sea of consciousness, transformed into its current state by that black sun.

And that black sun was perhaps the Ancient Dragon before him, mountain-like in size and covered from head to toe in black scales.

In response to Bai Heng's question, the Ancient Dragon spoke in a deep, ancient voice.

"If you know of Suiren, then you can understand my existence."

Having lived on the Xianzhou for more than a decade, Bai Heng had naturally heard Suiren's story.

Legend had it that during the Xianzhou's war against the fire calamity, Qiongsang, homeland of the Wingweavers, was drawn by the power of The Ambrosial Arbor and slowly approached the Luofu.

The Wingweavers and the colossal beasts of the Denizens of Abundance had also begun pressing in on the Xianzhou fleet.

At that time, an unnamed hero stepped forth and made a body-possession bargain with Suiren, who had been imprisoned within the Xianzhou Zhuming, borrowing Suiren's power.

With a single arrow, the unnamed hero severed The Ambrosial Arbor, pierced the colossal beast, and cut the connection between the Luofu and Qiongsang, turning the tide of battle in one stroke.

Later, that unnamed hero vanished in the war, and later generations of the Xianzhou honored him as the Lord of the Divine Bow.

"I remember that Suiren was imprisoned in the Xianzhou Zhuming. If you are also a Suiyang, do you have some connection to it?" Bai Heng voiced the doubt in his heart.

"As you can see, I differ from ordinary Suiyang. They imprisoned me here because I am Suiren's shadow, a fragment split from it, one that nurtures a portion of destruction! And the strongest portion at that!"

It stared at Bai Heng. Its crimson-gold pupils shone like the rising sun, as though they could devour all things.

Yet Bai Heng was unaffected by that oppressive presence. He spread his hands and said,

"I may understand your purpose now. Just like Suiren and the Lord of the Divine Bow, you wish to make a body-possession bargain with me. You will grant me your power, but in return, you need my help to gain freedom. Is that right?"

"That is correct." The deep voice seemed to descend from the heavens, majestic and overwhelming.

Having received its answer, Bai Heng frowned and looked at the Ancient Dragon.

"Why me?"

The Ancient Dragon spread its pitch-black wings. Those mountain-sized wings blotted out half the sky as it spoke again.

"You are not my only choice, but you are the most suitable one thus far. There are two reasons. First, to us Suiyang, the emotions of long-lived species are like a cup of bitter wine, while the emotions of short-lived species are like fine brew. In a life-or-death crisis, we would not choose to coexist with a long-lived species. And you are the finest vessel I have found so far."

"Second, I am the shadow in which Suiren placed destruction, while both you and that sword carry a dense aura of destruction. It feels familiar to me. Moreover, They seem to be watching you as well."

"Destruction... They... those dreams?" Bai Heng muttered thoughtfully.

He did not know what other motives this Suiyang might have.

But the Luofu stood at the brink of ruin, and he had no other choice.

Even if he had to throw himself into the game, he had to try.

After a moment, he raised his head and said, "If I agree to your bargain, what must I do?"

The Ancient Dragon looked toward the blood-red firmament overhead and said,

"The reason I entered your sea of consciousness was to give you one final trial after you agreed to bargain with me. After all, I only have one chance. I cannot gamble my life on it. If you pass this trial, I can form a contract with you immediately."

"What is the trial?"

Bai Heng gripped Soulsever and asked,

The Ancient Dragon's voice rang like a great bell.

"Question your heart."

With that, it gave Bai Heng no time to react.

The scenery around him shifted, and the scorched earth of blood and fire became another scene.

Bai Heng found himself in a dilapidated little town. The place was desolate and dead silent. The low stone houses had been reduced to crumbling walls and ruins, devastation as far as the eye could see. The pedestrians on the streets were frail and lifeless, all moving numbly and mechanically, silently awaiting the day their threads finally snapped.

Even after more than a decade, Bai Heng could not forget this place. After all, it had once been his home.

Bai Heng continued forward, while the people around him seemed unable to notice his presence.

Until a small, thin boy with delicate features stood before him.

Bai Heng recognized the boy. He was his former self.

His younger self looked at Bai Heng and asked,

"Big Brother, you clearly knew being taken away meant death. Why didn't you tell Sister that night and let her be taken away by Mom and Dad? You clearly had a chance to leave with Brother and Little Brother. Why did you abandon them and leave alone? You're so strong now, so why don't you go find them? Why don't you take revenge? Why? Tell me, why?"

Bai Heng could not answer, because during this questioning of the heart, he was merely a defendant with no right to speak.

The scene changed again, the barren little town becoming a silent, abandoned starport.

A boy covered in dust, his face scraped and bruised, looked at Bai Heng and demanded,

"Why? Why were you the one who survived in the end? Why did only a selfish bastard like you survive? Why did they have to become sacrifices in the game? They made the plan. They piloted the skiff. You were nothing but dead weight who could not help with anything, yet you became the only one to survive. Why?"

Bai Heng ignored the other's fury and took a step forward.

This time, he appeared at the Sea of Stars Skiffs on the Xianzhou Luofu.

The person before him was no longer the child from before, but his present self: the disciple of the Sword Champion and a Cloud Knight Vanguard.

That version of himself held a sword in one hand and spoke as Bai Heng passed by him.

"Why do you wield a sword? Bai Heng, is it to personally kill your comrades-in-arms? Slash after slash, you pierced their shells and carved apart their flesh. They call you the Reaper. I think it suits you well. After all, your hands are stained with more than just the blood of abominations! When you swing your sword, do you feel remorse? Do you pity them? Regrettably, I know the answer in your heart. You do not. To you, they are still merely strangers. If it had been your master or your senior brother who became Mara-Struck, would you have swung your sword so easily?"

Bai Heng's steps did not hesitate in the slightest. He continued onward.

Until he returned once more to that scorched earth of blood and fire, where the person standing before him became his present self.

The person before him asked the final question.

"Tell me, what is the path you wish to walk? What have you truly been seeking all this way? Tell me."

He repeated the question again and again, until Bai Heng stood before him and spoke his first words.

"Are you done?"

Before the other could respond.

Bai Heng drew his sword, and Soulsever slashed out.

The remnant shadow known as the heart demon turned to fragments.

Bai Heng said softly,

"Sorry, but you talk too much. I can't be bothered to listen."

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