(This novel was typed entirely by hand, no AI. If I used AI, may my whole family die!)
(Please excuse any awkward sentences or paragraphs, including those that have been revised.)
(Brain storage.)
"If you're happy today, clap your hands, clap clap."
"If you're happy tomorrow, clap your hands too, clap clap."
The night in Liyue was especially cool.
On his way back to his little home in Chihu Rock, Shen Luolun hummed a tune cheerfully.
He had received his royalties today.
A full ten million Mora.
Writing books paid well.
Or rather, plagiarizing books paid well.
That was right.
Shen Luolun wasn't from this world.
In his previous life, he had tried to save a giant snake being chased by a dump truck, only to be taken out by the truck himself. He had reincarnated into his favorite game-Genshin Impact!
Fortunately, he hadn't transmigrated into someone else's body.
Otherwise, he would have been cursed out.
After all, someone else would have done all the work for his benefit.
Ahem, back on topic.
With the help of the brilliant literary works from his previous life, Shen Luolun had thrived in the culturally impoverished Teyvat. He had even become an honored guest in the Seven Nations and led a carefree life.
Shen Luolun often marveled at it.
Living such an awesome life so early, at his age, he had to be doing better than 99% of Genshin Impact players, right?
Actually, that was too low.
"Now that I've got my royalties, I'll go order ten Buddha Jumps Over the Wall from Xiangling and get my crit rate up to a hundred. After eating, I'll go listen to Yun Jin sing a tune or two. She's got new songs lately. Oh, right, Sister Ying'er left me a note saying she wanted to talk about life tonight. Talk about life? That's my favorite thing to talk about."
Shen Luolun happily planned out his evening's entertainment.
Completely oblivious.
An irregular black shape lay on the ground in front of him.
If nothing went wrong, something was about to go wrong.
"Ow!"
As Shen Luolun walked, his right foot caught on something. He lost his balance and slammed into the ground.
"Which goddamn bastard left a rock here?!"
"Ow, damn it, you nearly killed your grandpa Shen!"
"Son of a bitch!"
Shen Luolun cursed under his breath.
This road was a little secluded at night, but he had walked it countless times, and hardly anything ever happened.
Yet today, something had to happen.
Motherfucker.
Could someone be jealous of my huge royalty payment and trying to rob and murder me?
The Geo Archon has been murdered! Lock the place down!
Shen Luolun got up and rubbed his scraped wrist, then glared at the "obstacle" that had tripped him.
I'm throwing this damn rock away!
But when he took a closer look-
Gulp-
Shen Luolun swallowed hard and stumbled back three steps in fright.
That was no rock. It was a person!
In the faint moonlight, a woman lay on the ground.
She had an exquisitely beautiful face, black silk stockings, large waves, and a Staff of Homa on her back.
(Staff of Homa: How rude!)
Unfortunately, she wasn't in good shape. Blood trickled from the corner of her mouth, and her eyes were shut tight. She was clearly badly injured.
"Hiss..."
Shen Luolun sucked in a sharp breath.
Teyvat's carbon dioxide levels decreased by 0.000001%.
"What happened here? Who is she?"
Why is someone lying on the ground this late at night?
Could there have been a murder nearby?
The Treasure Hoarders did seem to have been causing trouble lately, killing and robbing people from time to time. As a result, his close friend Yelan often stayed out all night, swamped with work, and occasionally complained to him about it.
At the thought, Shen Luolun's face fell.
Ah, no, not this kind of thing.
All I want is to take my royalties home, go out and have fun, and enjoy a happy life lying flat like a salted fish!
Murders and all that can screw right off.
"Hey, hey, are you all right?"
Shen Luolun spoke tentatively.
The mysterious woman in black silk stockings didn't respond.
He picked up a twig and poked the large waves.
Still no response.
Fortunately, a closer look showed the faint rise and fall of her chest, proving she was still alive.
Having confirmed that the mysterious woman in black silk stockings was merely unconscious and not dead, Shen Luolun breathed a sigh of relief.
Phew, she scared the hell out of me.
I really thought someone had died.
Running into this sort of thing at night could give a guy cardiac arrest.
Once he had calmed down, Shen Luolun found himself in a quandary.
"What now?"
Since she's not dead, do I save her or not?
It would have been fine if he hadn't seen her, but he had.
He couldn't just pretend nothing had happened.
But the intuition he had honed over many years told him this woman was definitely no ordinary person. A mysterious, beautiful woman in extraordinary clothes was lying on his way home.
Classic. Too damn classic.
That was how novels always went.
Once the protagonist saved her,
A whole series of troubles would follow, including but not limited to losing his fortune, the destruction of his family, the night his clan was wiped out...
Do you want to dance and feel pain too? How many floors must a bag of rice be carried up?!
So, I have to be careful, careful, and damn careful.
Saving her might bring a whole heap of trouble.
Although Shen Luolun knew that every detail of a novel's plot was made up, what if?
Just then, Shen Luolun's little devil appeared with a pitchfork and said wickedly:
"That's right, just leave her here. We've barely had a few days of the good life. Don't lose the big picture over something small."
"Let her live or die on her own here."
"Out of sight, none of our business."
Shen Luolun was still torn:
"But my little head dad told my big head son to save her. A woman this beautiful has to be saved!"
The little devil flew into a rage:
"Is your little head controlling your big head? A beauty? Now that you're rich, you can order as many as you want. Why care about her? Don't go looking for trouble."
The little angel appeared. He agreed with Shen Luolun:
"No, we can't just stand by and let her die."
"And she's such a pretty young lady. What if she offers herself to you in return?"
The little devil curled his lip.
What if?
Don't make your bro Shen laugh.
He had stayed single for so many years through sheer ability.
What good would her offering herself to him do?
Shen Luolun rubbed his chin and pondered.
He actually wanted to express his feelings with the classic protagonist's signature moves: rubbing his nose, smiling wryly, and shrugging.
But they were too cliché, and he was afraid the readers would curse him out, so he decided against it.
"Forget it, forget it. I'll save her."
In the end, he couldn't bring himself to leave her there.
When it came down to it, he was a sucker for a pretty face.
If it were a several-hundred-pound soulmate or a lump of menzi, just see whether your bro Shen would hesitate.
This kind was the hardest to scrape off the bottom of a shoe.
Right, certain world-number-one ice-element Hunt main DPS?
(I heard there's going to be a crossover with the game next door. That new shark girl is so impressive. Does she even dare ignore me now?)
(Image.)
Shen Luolun scooped the woman up.
Her light weight surprised him a little.
"She's way too light."
Black silk stockings and large waves, yet she weighed even less than Yaoyao. He had thought she would be heavy.
By ordinary logic, that shouldn't be the case.
Even if Genshin Impact was a supernatural world, it still had to obey the basic law of conservation of mass, right?
Truly amazing.
And it looked like all her nourishment had gone to the right places.
Nice!
A certain Shenzhou flat board would surely cry in frustration if she found out.
(Fist of Taixuan!)
(Have mercy, immortal! Socks!)
"All the better. Less effort."
Shen Luolun muttered and carried her back to his little home.
Along the way,
Shen Luolun looked calm on the surface, but in reality...
Subarashii~
She smells so nice.
So soft.
So smooth.
Hiss~
Ah~ So this is a girl's body?
Nice!
Of course, he was merely holding her and didn't make the slightest inappropriate move.
Your bro Shen wasn't used to playing co-op in the wild.
Before long, he arrived home.
Shen Luolun pushed open the bedroom door and laid the woman on the bed.
He thoughtfully covered her with a blanket, crouched beside the bed, took her soft, smooth jade hand, and gazed at her tenderly.
In this life, if you do not wake, I shall wait for you for the rest of my life.
"Wait?"
Shen Luolun slapped himself and came to his senses.
What am I doing?
Why am I setting myself up as some kind of air conditioner?
Good grief, I've lost it.
That's what playing Genshin Impact did to me.
"My plans for tonight haven't changed. As for her, she can lie there. I'll deal with her tomorrow."
Shen Luolun was an independent man.
A male lead through and through.
He loved only himself.
Bringing her back was already thanks to the excellent social values he had cultivated in his previous life. That was as far as they went.
What? He was supposed to stay with her all night, then take care of her when she woke up? Even after learning she had offended the whole world, he was supposed to stand against the whole world for her?
Don't make Brother Shen laugh.
He didn't even know her, yet he was supposed to act like some devoted, noble gentleman?
He just lusted after her body. How shameless!
Brother Shen lusted after her too, but lust wouldn't put food on the table.
There was no need to fawn over her.
Life and death were up to heaven. Whatever happened, happened.
If she lived, he'd save her. If she died, he'd bury her.
It was that simple.